Chameleon Soul
by LanaRae
Summary: An Amity girl takes the plunge, right down a hole in the ground. Is Dauntless the place for her? Eric seems to hope so.
1. Chapter 1

**Some people are not made brave**

**Some people are not honest**

**Some people wouldn't help a stranger**

**Some people don't read**

**Some people don't enjoy being outside**

So what do you do when you're forced to choose between the five, do you struggle to fit into one, or do you just accept your fate and go live with the outcasts, the people that don't belong anywhere?

Factionless.

Lana is about to make this very decision

* * *

"Choose,"

The Abnegation giving me my tests voice spoke calmly throughout the room.

"Why?"

"Choose," That was all I got.

Staring between the cheese and the knife the choice seemed obvious,

Grabbing the knife I waited to see what would happen, maybe I should have taken the cheese?

Soon after the thought crossed my mind a growling dog lunged at me from out of nowhere.

Without thinking I stabbed the knife in-between the dog's shoulder blades not wanting to kill it, but to injure it enough to climb out from underneath it.

Quickly the scene changed and I was on a crowded bus, something I had never been on before. People pushed past you, something else I didn't see much, people pushing and shoving to get their way.

"Do you know this man?" A gravelly voice echoed, a man with a half burned face turned to me, holding out a newspaper.

Without a thought I answered,

"No,"

"You could save me," he continued on not taking no for an answer.

I had seen the man on the paper before, but I'm not quite sure where, he wasn't an Amity.

"I'm sure."

My breath increased as I was pulled out of the stimulation,

"Lana, your safe, it's over," the abnegation spoke sweetly, had she given me her name?

"And," I don't think my heart could take the suspense any longer. I had known my whole life what the test would tell me.

"Dauntless," she spoke with a small smile.

It would tell me I didn't belong.

After the tests were over I followed my fellow faction members out to the trucks.

Outside the cool air felt good against my skin, I hadn't thought I had been that nervous until it was over. I had always know it would tell me I wasn't Amity.

The dauntless train could be heard beating against the track as the faction grouped up to catch it, running with all their might they ascended the train, making it look so easy like there were invisible stairs they ran up.

An awkward honking noise filled my cranium as the Amity truck pulled up to herd us into the back.

Climbing in with everyone else, I wondered if I could make it onto the truck if it was moving. More than likely not.

"So, aren't you excited to get this over with?" an overly excited girl spoke from beside me. I knew who she was, we had been forced together since we were small.

"What over with?"

"Initiation so we can get on with our life,"

Oh she was talking about Amity initiation. Britney was an Amity for life, she was trustful, self-sufficient, and kind. She even played the banjo in the fields for the farmers for Christ's sake.

"Yeah, can't wait," I yelled over the music that had just began playing, choosing not to join in on their mean less singing.

Staring over at Britney again as she began belting out the tune and clapping along, I couldn't help but to feel hatred towards her, she was perfect, everything I and my mother, along with the leaders of our faction had tried to push me to be.

I had spent more time in the _"Timeout," _room growing up then I cared to speak of, I had indecent thoughts that grew more every day.

When someone wronged me, I ALWAYS, ALWAYS got revenge, sometimes at the price of my faction.

And it felt good, damn good.

Stepping off the truck I snuck away from the group not wanting to carry a bag of food to the leader hall like everyone else had.

I needed to think before they got there.

I venture out into the woods, further then allowed and climbed the tallest tree until I could no longer hear the singing from the inner circle of town.

'_Would I really leave home? Away from my family and all I knew, I was finally getting the hang of faking Amity. Smiling at the right times and laughing in unison with the groups. I could stay behind and have a nice life; Britney seemed to think we were friends, I could stay with her. We could work in the fields together, which personally didn't sound pleasant, but doable. She was already looking forward to initiation with me._

"Lana," my mother's voice traveled through the trees, it had a loving tone that I would never grow old of,

"Alana, come to me,"

With a rarity of a true smile I jumped out of the tree and followed her voice.

"Hello baby, how was your test?" She was not supposed to ask, why was she asking?

"Um good mom," I leaned forward allowing her to press her lips to my forehead.

"I was thinking, tomorrow after choosing, I would like to discus with the group you working in my section of field, how would that be?" she asked reaching out for my hand to follow her.

She thinks I'm staying. She wants to bring up the matter of me staying to the group. The group that so desperately wants to relieve themselves of me.

"That would be nice mom,"

Once we got to the house my father was setting in our backyard eating a bowl of greens, my parents made a choice when they first decided to marry to eat meat free, to love the animals instead of slaughter them.

"Dad," I nodded my head in his direction setting down beside him with my own bowl. Soon we were joined by my mother who was carrying my 5 month old baby sister Becky.

Sitting down she pressed her lips against my father's for a longer time then I deemed necessary, which they didn't seem to mind.

Free love and all.

It was so free I was their first child out of marriage, at the ripe old age of 16. They had choose Amity together, never telling me where they were from, and they had chosen each other as well. I was born exactly 10 months later.

"Lana, when we leave tomorrow I signed you up for crop carrying right after the ceremony so be sure to dress appropriately."

No other words were spoken as he pulled out his guitar and began strumming a beat while my mother bopped around with my sister in her arms.

This was living.

For them;

They didn't suspect I would leave, because in their eyes there was no better way to live.


	2. Chapter 2

The sound of banjo's in the field woke me up, early, far to early.

That was something I wouldn't miss.

After dinner last night my parents decided to allow me reflection time before bed. Sometime I used to dread, usually because as a child that meant I had done something wrong and instead of being yelled at I would be put in a room by myself, hoping I would look at my inner self for punishment.

Had I not known then I wasn't cut out for this?

As a child I would pack my bags, with what little things I had, usually a corn husk doll and an extra pair of sandals, and take off for the city, they would always catch me before I would make it to my desired destination.

The faction less, I had always had an obsession with them. They had the kind of freedom I would kill for.

They belonged to no one and no one or nothing belonged to them.

Now the closest thing to freedom I could muster was the people riding the trains, and that was where I would go.

On the truck towards the city I was sat between my family and Britney, who likewise was beside hers.

"Meet me after the ceremony we will ride together," she spoke to me in almost a hushed tone.

_Why was she whispering, we were encouraged to make friends. _

"Yeah, that would be great," I faked smile at her, something I had become a pro at.

My mother rested her head on my shoulder as we passed into the city territory.

"Don't be nervous my sweet baby, I'm sure the group will allow you to work,"

How could I tell her?

I felt in the pocket of my jeans to be sure it was in there, a single lined note I had written to my mother last night.

Three words in my goodbye.

**Mom. I'm Sorry.**

I didn't know how to say it, so I wouldn't.

Maybe Britney could help her on the ride home, hold he as she cried for the loss of her child.

The beginning of the ceremony passed in a jumble of words and kids moving up to the stage to choose.

" Alana Eversong,"

My body moved faster than my mind, getting out of the chair and onto my legs, I grabbed my moms calloused hands, slipping the small piece of paper in, and I never looked back.

"DAUNTLESS,"

My new faction cheered, and the rest of the room calmly clapped.

If I looked at her what would I see, disappointment? Tear? I think what worried me the most would be to see a smile on her face.

"Britney Graceson,"

The name wasn't enough to drag me out of my mind I knew what I was missing, her choosing to be the perfect Amity she was for life.

"DAUNTLESS,"

My green eyes looked up just in time to see Britney look up at the crowd where her family was seated and flip them the bird.

Things just got weird.

Quickly she made it off the stage and over to the empty seat beside me.

"What are you doing Britney?" I said more of a demand than a question,

"What I said we would ride together, you didn't think I meant back to Amity did you?" She asked with a smirk on her face, I had never seen a smirk on any Amity's face, but mine in the mirror.

Before I could answer she continued on with her words.

"Surely you didn't think that I thought you would stay? You're in trouble more than the Dauntless kids are,"

* * *

"Follow me,"

The Dauntless representative spoke to our group as the Dauntless born congratulated each other and the new transfers silently glanced at the floor.

Making our way into the city I couldn't help but smile into the bright sun, a thousand pounds of weight lifted off my shoulders.

Soon everyone began running, I knew where we were going, I had been watching them for years.

"Wow, watching the train you never notice how fast it's going," Britney spoke as I hauled her onto the train after I steadied myself.

"I know, they just hop and are on,"

I sat myself against the cold metal wall of the train, making room for her,

"I never pictured myself here, with you, no offence," I said in her direction.

"I didn't either," she paused for a moment, "I didn't think I'd ever be the real me," she smiled one of the biggest smiles I had ever seen.

"And then you flipped your parents off," I laughed shoving her shoulder.

"In my defense, I don't know where that came from, but it seemed like the thing to do,"

"No the thing to do would be to smash every banjo in the place before we left, if I had known, we could of met up last night," I joked

"I told you plain blank," she smiled.

"Well um, what can I say, I thought you meant Amity."

"Really, you, Alana, you're the people Amity warn themselves about, you spiteful bitch,"

"It's just Lana," I couldn't help but smile back, I had never heard curse words before, but coming out of her mouth they seemed so fluid, like they belonged.

"Good, I'm just Brit,"

"Well Brit, this seems like beginning of a beautiful friendship," I said resting my head against the train wall,

"Oh god, you're not going to sing are you…"

* * *

"Lana, they are jumping," Brit shook me,

I quickly got to my feet to look out the window, kids dressed in black in the cars in front of us were jumping onto the roof top,

"That looks so dangerous," an Erudite boy beside me spoke glancing out the window,

"Really, I think it looks fun,"

I made my way back over to Brit a smile on my face so big my cheeks hurt,

"You would, together?"

I nodded my head before she grabbed my arm and we took off running together.

Rolling onto the gravel roof, an Ough of a sound came out of Brit's mouth while a laugh came out of mine.

"Your crazy girl," she said standing on her feet along with me,

"You jumped too,"

"I guess I did," she looked so pleased with herself.

I quickly looked back at the train to see the Erudite boy looking out the window as it passed the roof, he was on his way to nowhere, he had failed initiation.

All of us who had made it off the train grouped up near an older guy standing on the edge of the roof,

"For you transfer's my name is Max, and I'm one of the five leaders here at Dauntless," his face looked like it hadn't smiled in years, "Feet below us is the members entrance, and it's the only way you're getting in,"

"You want us to jump?" A candor girl spoke, "You've got to be crazy,"

"Here there is no crazy, its bravery and either you are or not," he swallowed, "And somebody had got to go first," he jumped off the end of the roof onto the gravel making room for whoever would go first, no one moved.

"I'll go," I spoke, knowing it was clearly not a dead end, they would find a much better way to kill us then a jump.

It took me less than thirty seconds to talk myself onto the ledge and push off, it was just like jumping out of a tall tree in Amity.

Or so I told myself as a screech exited my mouth.

A net.

A Net.

Thank god it was a net.

Bouncing a final time I couldn't help but laugh, I just jumped off a building.

The weight of the net shifted as I rolled to one end and was lifted off, being placed onto the ground.

"What's your name," a deep voice asked me, in the light from the hole I could see it was a boy not much older than me,

"Lana," I spoke lightly after having the air knocked out of me during the fall.

"First jumper LANA," the boy yelled out to the hole, as the crowd began to cheer.

After everyone made it down the hole, including Britney, the boy spoke again.

"My name is Four, and I'll be your trainer until your final test," he paused looking the group over, "for those of you who are brave enough to stay."

The end of his sentence brought Goosebumps to the back of my neck.

"I'm usual in the control room, but I come out once a year to train," he spoke walking away from the group, expecting us to follow.

"This is where we split, Dauntless born go with Lauren, transfers, with me."

He continued to tell us the history of dauntless showing us to direct places, the pit, chasm, but my least favorite our room.

"We believe in close quarters here, so get used to these faces, you'll be seeing them a lot,"

That was the understatement of the year, close, 7 people in a room for 4.

After we settled in we made our way to dinner.

Brit and I stood in the doorway until some dauntless born pushed past us. Muttering something about transfers.

"First things first, we need to make friends," Brit spoke scanning the room.

Finding an empty space she sat leaving me a small hole between her and Four.

"I'll leave the friend thing up to you, people don't' really like me," I said in a hushed tone, apparently not quite enough for Four, he grunted when I finished speaking.

"I thought all of you hippies in Amity loved each other?" he shook whatever was in his metal cup around before sloshing it into his mouth.

"Well let's just say Lana is a special case," Brit spoke.

I looked over the table searching for something to eat as Brit pilled whatever meat substance was being served onto her plate.

I reached for an apple and began biting into it,

"Aren't you going to have a burger?" she asked as more people sat down.

"Um I don't think so," I reached over poking whatever was on her plate with a fork.

"You've never had a burger before?" a Candor boy asked taking a big bite.

"Um, I've never had meat before," I shrugged my shoulders like it was no big deal.

"Aren't you going to introduce me Four," a voice interrupted the group of people giving me an interview.

"Eric this is Brit and Lana," Four nodded in our respective directions.

The man, Eric, seemed uninterested, as he spoke with Four.

The guy was built, bigger than the guys in Amity who worked the fields, lifting and hoeing all day. His hair was short by Amity standards but long compared to Four and the Candor boy. His fair skin seemed to glisten against the harsh lights of the room. But what interested me most was the bits of metal sticking out of his face, and the thick patches of ink on his neck.

"What's your tattoo?" I spoke out of turn, interrupting their conversation.

"Really?" he asked in my direction.

Before walking away.

"What is his problem?" I nudged Four with my shoulder.

"That's just how he is."

With that Four got up and left too.

"And, that, is why you're in charge of friends," I spoke as heat raised to my embarrassed face.

"Well my name is Matt, now you've made a friend," the Candor boy said in my direction.

The whole rest of dinner Matt and Brit tried to convince me to try a burger and when I finally couldn't take it anymore I ate one just to get them to be quiet. But I couldn't help but relies that night was the most I had ever laughed in my whole life.

* * *

After we had all lied down for bed I couldn't help but notice the cramping in my stomach. I think my burger was fighting back.

Standing up trying to stretch out the cramp didn't work so I slipped on my shoes and decided to take a walk.

I ended up over the Chasm, staring down into the water, not even taking note of my surroundings as finally the burger won out,

Gagging over the end of the chasm, I jumped back a thousand feet as a hand grabbed my hair just in time to miss my once eaten burger.

Finally after what seemed like an hour of puking I stopped.

"Thank you," I spoke without turning around, whipping off my mouth onto the inside of my shirt.

"Don't mention it," a voice I recognized spoke, I quickly whipped my head around to come face to face with deep gray eyes.

Eric.

I looked him over noticing he was in black sweatpants and t-shirt.

But what I saw last brought a blush to my face.

"I'm sorry, I think I puked on your shoes,"

* * *

A/N: I don't own anything. Please Review and let me know what you think. I have never written a fanfiction before.

Thanks

Lana


	3. Chapter 3

Eric's POV

Rubbing my head from last night's drinking binge I followed the roar of people until I made it to the dining hall.

The roar of the room seemed to soften as I stepped inside, per usual. In a room full of black and red, the new transfers stood out.

And history shows where they were Four would be.

Making my way to his broad back I couldn't help but snicker, he was much smaller than I was, and I'm not sure in a fight he would win anymore, probably because I rather die than let him.

Pulling me out of my silent conversation a set of huge green eyes met mine.

She was sitting with Four at the table with the other initiates, in a bright yellow top, along with some sort of headband around her head. She looked like the people from the sixties we had to study in erudite history.

Amity.

Before I could get any closer John made his way up to me, he was my only true friend in Dauntless; he was a transfer from erudite with me. He was the only one who knew the real me, the guy who drinks himself to death every night to keep the nightmares away.

"Well look who finally showed himself," John spoke clapping a thick hand against my back.

"I've been busy," I squinted against the lights of the room to look up at John's face.

" Busy nursing a hangover," john laughed, "You'd think after two years you wouldn't get them anymore," he continued on muttering about how the erudite needed to cure the hangover. But I couldn't listen to him, the girl sitting beside four was slowly poking the girl's burger beside her with a bent fork.

"Eric, are you listening?" John could be such a woman sometime.

"What?" I shook my head trying to get her image to disappear, But looking up again I continued to stare at her.

"What are you looking at?" John scanned the room in the direction I was looking in.

"Amity? Really Eric? I don't feel like carrying a crying Amity home after you bag her and toss her out,"

"That was one time John," So maybe I had not such a healthy relationship with Woman.

"One is enough. Although she might be tougher then she portrays, she was first jumper."

I felt a shocked reaction spread across my face. Amity? First Jumper.

"I'll leave you to it then," John walked off in the direction of his girlfriend Tori.

Closing the space between Four and I; I tried to think of something to say to him. I noticed the girl was being pressured by her friends with a piece of the burger on the fork shoving it towards her mouth.

"Um I've never had meat before," The Amity spoke to the Candor boy across from her. Never eaten meat?

"Aren't you going to introduce me Four?" I put on my in charge voice, Flexing my muscles as I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Eric, this is Brit," An Amity I didn't care about, "And Lana," I tried my hardest to keep from staring as I made up some lie about Max looking for Four, trying to have a reason to be at the table.

"What's your tattoo?" She asked. She shouldn't have asked. People didn't speak to me out of curiosity, people spoke to me in fear. I had taken pride in showing up in more than one of the transfer's fears cape last year.

"Really?" I mocked watching her eyes squint trying to get a better look at my neck. She would see them, my scars.

Without even thinking I walked away from the table, and away from the heat of her stare.

John caught my eye on the way out and laughed. Knowing the girl had pissed me off.

Once I reached the hall Sarah came over with a piss poor attempt at pushing me against the wall,

"Last night was fun Eric," She spoke in a tone almost like the meowing of a cat.

Sarah had been this weeks special, one of the girls who thought they would change me, make me softer, kinder. She also used her job in the kitchens to get my alcohol.

"Yeah, it was okay," I pushed her back, not feeling in the mood today.

"Want to have a rerun?" she batted her eyelashes coated in mascara, clumps so thick sometimes in my drunken stupor I thought small bugs were stuck on the tips of them.

"I'm busy Shelly," I heard her yell "SARAH," down the hall as I walked away. I knew her damn name, but I didn't care enough to let her know that.

"What did the Amity do to you?" John spoke passing me the bottle, later that night in my apartment.

I growled in return.

"Asked what my tattoo was," I subconsciously reached up and rubbed the sides of my neck.

"OFF WITH HER HEAD!" he yelled in a friendly tone, He as well as I knew it was no big deal.

"I'll make sure it's done during fighting," I laughed back. Finally being myself in the safety of my own home, and with a little liquid encouragement.

John and I continued to bicker, discussing what Jeanie had us doing, how annoying Four was, and how I would beat his ass given the chance.

Too soon we were out of liquor, I tipped the bottle back, a little dramatically, to show John it was defiantly empty.

"Thank god, I've got to get back or Tori will have my ass," John and Tori had been together for about a year, she was the tattoo supreme and he was the muscular leader of the fence gang. It was a close as Cheerleader Football player we had in this time. I informed them of that when everything began, to which they just informed me I cared far too much about history in erudite.

"Run home to your woman so she can beat you John," I stumbled over to doorway, "I'm going to find more to drink,"

Locking the door I followed the dim lights in the opposite direction of John and towards the kitchens.

I had learned the path so well I could do it in my sleep.

Left. Left. Right. Over the Chasm…

That was where my path took a turn.

Starring down into the water was Lana, her face was as pale as a ghost with a slight green tint. What was it with Amity and the chasm?

Before I could process what happened she was up off her feet, making a horrible gagging noise. My rough hands wrapped around her soft dark hair, causing her to jump in fright, closer to me and less to the edge of the chasm. She continued to puke her guts up and silent tears were running down her face. When she thought it was over she turned her green eyes towards me, opening her mouth to say something another batch of vomit came out, landing on my only pair of boots.

When she was sure it was finally over she turned her back to me once again, rubbing her shirt against her mouth.

"Thank you," the voice that had burned into my head earlier spoke in a pathetic tone.

"Don't mention it," I growled back letting her hair slide free, before she turned to meet me again.

She took a minute to look me over before a red tint spread across her face settling on her cheeks.

"I'm sorry, I think I puked on your shoes," she muttered before skewering down the hall.

AN: Is anyone liking this story? Any reviews would help, they seem to be a motivation.


	4. Chapter 4

Eric's POV

"Jesus Eric, what happened to your shoes?"

It was too early, way too early. John knew better then to wake me this early.

"What do you want?" I hissed my voice full of sleep.

"You've got to get up, you're with Four and the Transfers today," I didn't respond but someone else did,

"Can't you just stay here?"

Sarah?

I rolled over to see her on the opposite side of my bed with sheets pulled up to her neck, covering herself from John.

"What are you still doing here?" I growled at her, she knew better than to stay the whole night.

"I fell asleep," she reached over to stroke my chest. Which I openly moved out of the way of.

"Well you're up now," I threw my head back on the pillow. "Bye."

A huff could be heard as the weight of the bed shifted and John's laugh filled the air. When she was finally out of my room I let the breath I was holding escape.

"They will never learn will they?" John began tossing clothes onto my bed.

"Get, out! I'm up!" I threw my pillow in his direction in a laugh.

"Have fun spending the day with your Amity girl," John spoke stepping into the hall, "And throw those shoes away," He shut the door.

Damn I had forgotten about my puke covered shoes, clearly I could not wear them today. Digging through my closet for no reason, I huffed when I came out empty handed, I knew I owned no other shoes.

"Damn Amity,"

* * *

Lana's POV

Holding a gun in your hand for the first time is life changing, the weight of it surprising, the cold metal against your hands made the hair on the back of your neck stand.

If only my mother could see me now.

The force of the bullet leaving the gun knocked the air out of me the first time, but now I had got a handle on it. I wouldn't be killing anybody anytime soon, but if I was aiming for their heart I would at least blow a toe off.

"Okay initiates, get to lunch, then meet me back here for fight training,"

Lunch, something I wasn't looking forwards to after last night projectile spectacular.

I also let out the breath I didn't know I was holding when I made my way to the pit this morning and Eric wasn't standing there with four.

But after lunch was a different story. I picked at my apple core walking down the hall listening to Matt and Brit joke about my none meat experience once again. Before I looked around the room a voice I had grown too familiar with spoke.

"For those of you who don't know, or remember, my name is Eric, and you'll do well to remember it," he spoke with such anger, who could forget it? "I'm one of the five leaders of Dauntless," he seemed so young? He went on explaining the ranking system before he finished his speech with a sentence that chilled to the bone.

"You chose us," he paused for dramatic effect. "Now we get to choose you."

Four quickly took back over instructions on how to fight and avoid being hit while Eric circled the room watching us.

When I was sure he wasn't watching me I did a once over scan of his body again. Nothing had changed, except the dark circles under his eyes had grown bigger; and further down I scanned and noticed he was wearing black house slippers.

Snorting in a laugh I continued to hit the bag while Four and Eric continued circling. Somehow they ended up crossing paths right behind me.

"Eric, what are you wearing on your feet, are those house shoes?" Four snickered behind me, only to hear a rumble of a man answer.

"And if they are? I could still beat your ass on with slippers. _Tobias," _Four didn't respond and continued making his rounds.

Tobias? Was that Four's real name?

"You''ll never win standing like that," Eric jumped me once again as his cold hands touched my bare stomach, where I was only in a sports bra. I turned to look at him, not saying anything.

"Oh god, you're not going to puke again are you?"

* * *

"I think I want a tattoo," Matt spoke during dinner as I poked around in what the Dauntless called a salad, which was really more of a bowl of lettuce.

"Of what, my face, so you can remember it when I beat your ass?" Britney spoke in a flirting tone.

"No so I can remember what it looks like when it gets mangled," he shot back quickly turning to me, "What about you Lana, want a tattoo?" he pulled me in tightly with his arms.

"Nope, don't think so," I said for some reason resting my head on his shoulder. I had never had someone voluntarily touch me in Amity. They were afraid they would be pointed out as a rebel; as much as Britney likes to talk to me now, she never had before our test.

I kept my head on his shoulder, still tired from the sleep I missed out on last night. Suddenly the weight of the bench shifted beside me.

"I know you're from Amity, but here we don't lounge on each other," Eric's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Well I thought I would cuddle with him before I slept with him, to know if it was any good," the sarcastic mark slipped out. Eric's pierced eyebrow raised as anger once again spread across his face. He didn't say anything else as he filled his plate with whatever mystery meat they were serving tonight.

"Hey, I'm John, you're Lana the first jumper right?" A tall guy; apparently named John, sat down across from me at the table.

"Yeah, that's me," I smiled at him taking a drink of my water.

"Amity's never jump first," he stated grabbing the potato slices off Eric's plate instead of getting some from the middle of the table.

"Well, I left because I had a desire to jump off buildings into the unknown," I took another bite of my apple, rolling my salad with the other fork, as I felt a discustsed look cross my face.

"Really it looks like to me you came here for the food,"

I liked John already.

"She doesn't eat meat," Brit spoke to John, "I'm Britney,"

"John," he answered nodding his head in her direction. "What do you mean, you don't eat meat," he looked at me like I'd had two heads.

"Correction, I had never eaten meat till yesterday," I thought back to last night and head rose in my face again. "And it fought back, in the form of puke,"

John's eyes grew as he shot his head over to Eric, who was silently eating his food, staring at his plate, it was the most content I had seen him yet.

"Puke huh, did you…"

"Come on John," Eric interrupted jumping up grabbing John's arm to drag him away, but not before he got close to my ear, so only I could hear.

"I'm not a very good cuddles, but I'm damn good at fucking," he pushed his thick hand against my back in a sort of slap goodbye, making my arms ache from the fighting before.

"What was that about?" Four asked taking Eric's open seat.

"Oh, he was just warning me about the meat…"

Four gave me a confused look before he began fixing a plate, examining the meat.


	5. Chapter 5

We were woken up first thing in the morning by an unusual voice.

"Get up Bitches!"

I opened one eye towards the door to see the guy I had met during dinner yesterday yelling across the room.

John.

"That means you LANA!" he yelled as Eric came in behind him "Four had something to do today so you're with Eric and I,"

I made a first attempt to get up and my aching arm objected, just three more minutes, surely that wouldn't matter, I thought closing my eye up again.

"I said you LANA!" John's voice was close, to close.

A chill was brought to my whole body as John picked me up over his shoulder, first thought, I should of worn pants second thought, Eric could see my ass.

"Get up, its fight day," Eric yelled out to the rest of the room as I stretched across John's shoulder.

"Can I get down now?" I whispered in John's ear, while everyone raced around the room after Eric had yelled.

"Yeah, and you should probably put pants on," he laughed lightly slapping my butt as he put me down, quickly returning to Eric's side only to receive a slap to the back of his head.

I hunted around in the pile of clothes for the transfers until we got our own clothes.

"We need to get new clothes," a candor transfer, Alice, spoke beside me as she dug through the clothes as well. She was about the same size as me, and we usually were digging for the same set of clothes.

"After dinner?" I asked her as we slipped on our pants.

"It's a date," she spoke with a laugh slipping on a shirt about two sizes to big.

"COME ON!" Eric yelled walking out of the door.

"Why would Four do this to us?" Alice asked as we walked out of the room.

"Yesterday you learned how to fight a bag, today you will fight each other," Eric yelled to the group of us, pointing at the board displaying who will fight who.

Britney's name was first on the list, she was fighting Alice.

I continued scanning down until I saw Matt was fighting Alex an Erudite transfer.

Finally my eyes sat on my name

Lana Vs. Kyle

"You've got to be kidding," Matt muttered behind me as I scanned the room to find Alex.

He was big, tall

I'm no small girl, I'm about 5'8. But Alex, he stood at about 6'6 and probably weighed 200 plus pounds to my 125.

But his size wasn't what made me nervous, it was the way he smirked when he saw who he was fighting as he smashed his fist into his hand and rubbed them together.

"He's going to eat you…" Alice whispered from beside me.

After some words from John and Eric the first set took the mat.

Britney and Alice.

They looked like a fair fight, they were about the same size, from watching yesterday I knew Britney was fast, but Alice was strong. I sat down along the side of the ring and two bodies sat down on either side of me.

"I hope this isn't a blood bath, I like them both," I spoke to who I thought was Matt and Alex.

"I love blood baths," John's voice spoke surprising me. I looked on the other side of me to see it was Eric.

"He does love a blood bath," Eric spoke in a harsh tone. Did he ever smile? I tried my hardest to watch the fight but couldn't help my wandering eyes. I found myself staring at the side of Eric's face, but more importantly his tattoos, I still couldn't tell what they were, they just looked like blocks. But they had to be something, why else would he get them. After a few minutes he seemed to grow tired of the fight as he turned his head to look at me, figuring out I was staring he lifted his collar up around his neck, covering his neck.

"Stop playing with each other," he growled out to the girls, finally drawing my attention back to the fight. Both were covered in blood, John was getting his blood bath. Both Britney and Alice had blood running down their face, arms, and knuckles.

Finally after seemed like an awkward eternity in John and Eric's presence, Britney took one final hit to the face, and was passed out cold on the floor.

"Matt, take her to the infirmary, when you return you'll fight."

Eric went over to Alice, who looked like she was going to pass out.

For the first time I saw him do something kind, he tipped her head back pinching her nose and walked her to the bathroom. For some odd reason my heart gave a little flutter, for the ass who might somewhere have a soul.

Once Matt got back he and Alex fought for a bit before Alex's name got circled on the board.

As a unit my friends were looking weak.

Finally the minute everyone had been waiting for Kyle and I.

Kyle was already standing on the mat rubbing his hands together, he was too excited.

"Come on Lana, you got this!" Alice shouted as I tried to shake out my nerves before a hand wrapped around my wrist.

"Get angry," That was the only words I heard as gray eyes met mine.

"Haven't you met me?" I questioned, "I'm always angry," I tried to joke, it might be my last joke, I'm sure Kyle had the potential to beat my brain out of my skull.

"Get it giiirll," John yelled out as I stepped into the ring.

When we finally began to fight, I didn't know if it was everyone cheering for me or Eric's watchful eye but I had a hop in my step.

I dodged, dipped and dived trying my best to avoid his fists.

I was doing it, I was avoiding him. But as history would show confidence wrecks a smile spread across my face Kyle was sure to knock it off.

But he helped me in a way, he made me angry like Eric had told me to do.

Using all my weight I charged at him knocking us both to the floor, zoning all the noises out I didn't focus on anything but my fist hitting his skin, anything I could get ahold of. Blood was squirting anywhere, out of both of us as he got his hits in too. He was getting in more hits then I'd like to admit, but I wasn't giving up. Finally, in a dodge attempt I hit him with the only thing I could think of. I picked up my head slamming it into his in a violent head butt.

Ringing.

Everything was ringing.

I felt my body being lifted off the ground and pressed against a warm body, I automatically knew who it was.

"He pissed me off," I barley spoke as I wiggled closer to Eric.

"I know he did, he did me too," he ran his hair through my hair as he continued to carry me. At that moment I didn't know where we were going and I didn't care.

* * *

When I opened my eyes I was in an unfamiliar place beside me the weight of the bed I was on shifted as Eric's voice brought me completely out of my sleep.

"Hi," he spoke sleep deep in his voice.

"Hi," I rolled in his direction, "Where are we?" I should be freaking out, I just woke up, in bed with Eric. Mean Eric, Asshole Eric.

"My apartment, you didn't need to go to the infirmary, but you couldn't sit in the gym either, I brought you to the first place I thought of,"

Remembering what happened earlier a smile spread across my face,

"Yeah but I won though!"

My heart just about stopped when a laugh escaped his mouth.

"You won with a headbutt, you could have knocked that pea brain out," he joked.

"Boy's like stupid girls," I joked back, "Maybe then Matt will ask me to be his girlfriend, I think I blew my chances with Kyle."

I sat up slowly as I swung my legs over the side of the large bed.

"Where are you going?" he asked stretching out.

"I promised Alice we'd go get some clothes, these smell like whoever wore them last," I put my shoes on beside the bed reminding me.

I searched the floor until I saw his house shoes,

"What are you doing?"

"God you're full of questions," I spoke with a smile on my face. "But for your information I'm looking at your shoe size so I can get you more boots, you look like an idiot in slippers,"

Not waiting for his reply I walked out the door.

* * *

AN: Reviews for updates? P.s Thank you to my first 3 Reviewers!


	6. Chapter 6

"I didn't think you'd show,"

Alice stood at the top of the stone stairs that lead to the upper level of the pit, the closest place Dauntless had to a city store front.

"Girl, you're looking rough," I laughed dragging myself onto the top step. I must have gained fifty pounds today, I'd never had such problems walking up stairs.

"You're one to talk Lan, have you seen a mirror lately?" Alice laughed back. Underneath both of her dark brown eyes were back and blue with a strip of band aid over the top of her nose, scabs were over all her knuckles and she was slightly slumped over. But in my eyes she had never looked better, she was worn out and strong, and it showed to other dauntless she wasn't someone to be messed with.

"Let's go get some clothes, this shirt has pit stains from last year," I noticed when she grabbed my arm pain shot through it.

"Girl, don't lie, those are yours," I joked following behind her.

"What do you think?" Alice asked as she stepped out of the dressing room in a tight black dress that showed off her sharp shoulder blades and defined arms. Somehow the dress added age to her whole personality, in a good way.

"I think it looks great Al," I honestly told her, you could never lie to a Candor anyways. Examining herself in the mirror she turned both ways, before bringing her hands up to touch the bruises on her chubby cheeks.

"Are you sure I don't look like a man in a dress?" she asked with a tone of self-doubt in her voice.

"Do you really think I'd take a chance on trying to lie to you?" I laughed stepping up behind her onto the podium. For the first time seeing myself in the mirror. I was shocked to see what I saw.

"Al, I shouldn't have said anything about how you looked," I spoke leaning closer to the mirror. Both of my green eyes had dark circles around them that extended far past my cheek bones, and they were much more extensive than lack of sleep, bruises. My bronze skin from being in Amity for sixteen year looked bumpy and under nourished, probably from lack of meat free food in Dauntless. A huge purple knot was on my hairline, where I had slammed my head against Kyle's, drawing even more attention to my hair that I hadn't bothered, pulling up into a neat ponytail after leaving Eric's room. I looked like a hell hound.

"Hello, Lana, are you with me?" Alice's voice interrupted my mirror session. "It's your turn to try on some clothes, I think you're wearing guy's shorts for pants," her voice traveled as she shoved me into the fitting room.

"Alright, but I'm not putting on a dress."

Three pairs of workout bottoms, five tops, panties, bras and a pair of jeans later we were finally on our way out, before I remembered shoes for Eric.

Making a quick U-turn I spoke to the woman who had been helping us out,

"Do you have guy boots in a 14?" I asked the hunched over woman, who looked shocked quickly looking at my feet. "They're not for me, they're for a…friend," I quickly spoke up.

"What friend?" Alice questioned when the lady walked away into the hole in the rock wall. "John?" my awkward look crossed my face, as I heard my mother's voice echo in my head '**Alana, don't do that with your face, it might freeze looking like that,'**

"John, no, just a friend," I laughed thinking about me and John.

Soon the lady returned back with a pair of black boots with silver hooks.

I took the boots out of her hands while Alice continued to question on who my '_friend,'_ was.

"Do I know him?"

"Is he tall?"

"Does he look good?"

"Why are his feet so big?"

All she received after each question was a laugh, which just provoked her to ask more.

"Want to get a piercing?"

"Finally you're talking my language," I finally acted like I was paying attention to her as we turned right into the tattoo parlor built into the rock wall.

"There she is now!" John was sitting on a tattoo chair shirtless while a beautiful Asian woman was tattooing his back, "Tori, that's Lana, the girl that head-butted in her fight," she looked towards Alice and I as my cheeks filled with heat and her tattoo machine quit its buzzing, whipping the extra ink off John's back. As Alice spoke to the man more pierced than Eric was at the front counter I made my way over to John and the woman he called Tori.

"Hi, I'm John's girlfriend," a gorgeous smile spread across her face, it was warm and welcoming and whether she meant it or not it instantly calmed me.

"Lana, the head-butter," I slapped John in the head, is that the only thing he could think to tell her about me,

"Head butt extraordinaire and my new best friend," John confirmed with a goofy laugh.

"Run now," Tori laughed as she began dipping her needle in the ink, "Once he decides he's yours he never leaves, like a stray dog," John did a joking bark as he growled a bit when her needed began buzzing and touched to his back.

"Just don't pee on me," I spoke walking away.

"AS LONG AS YOU DON'T PUKE ON ME!" he yelled over the noise in the room.

"So, I'm getting my belly button, you in?" Alice already had rolled her shirt up for the pieced man to examine.

"Sounds good to me," spoke after I weighed the pros and cons before agreeing, seemed like even in fights it would be pretty much out of the way more than a nose or lip.

Once the needed pierced my skin I was glad for the fact it took the pain away from my face and hands if only for a moment, before it settled into a buzzing pain with the rest. My first piercing, a clear jewel hanging off my stomach, wouldn't my mother be proud.

"I had fun Lana," Alice spoke as we made our way into the dining hall, and to an empty metal table furthest from the door.

"I did too," I agreed staring at the food being served up tonight, meat, meat, and more meat, with a side of apples. Alice was a lot different than Brit, calmer and much less giddy. Strong and smart. What was best about her is she didn't know anything about my past, likewise I knew nothing about hers and she spoke to me not because there was no better choice, she chose me; like she had chosen dauntless. All signs pointed to me picking her as well.

"How's your head," she spoke to someone standing behind me. Turning I saw it was Kyle; who was sporting a matching bump on his hairline.

"Oh, it feels like a bus ran into it," he reached up to the spot as he sat beside me.

"Sorry about that," I said glancing my eyes down to the table.

"Don't be sorry, that's what we were supposed to do, fight." I quickly looked over at him to meet his eyes. "I rather lose to the first jumper than some random person," he reached across the table to the meat being served. "Besides you take hits better than I ever thought you would," a smirk spread across his thin face, and I noted he was squinting, remembering back to our first day he was wearing glasses. Had he given them up? To look less Erudite?

"Alice said you would eat me," I joked making light of the situation,

"I probably would have given the chance," he joked back as we settled into a comfortable silence.

After dinner we went our separate ways as they set out to the dorm and I made my way towards Eric's apartment to bring him his shoes. I heard quiet rock music playing as I finally reached his door. I was just glad he wasn't listening to banjo music.

Knocking I heard giggles before the door opened to Eric with no shirt on and his hair all messed up, a cloud of smoke also exiting out the door, but that wasn't what concerned me, it was the two bare naked blond girls on his bed. I felt more vomit raise into my mouth, but it wasn't food it was word vomit.

"I brought you boots," instead of passing them to him I sort of tossed the heavy boots at his head before turning around and running away.

* * *

AN: Shout out to my first group of reviews!

Love-Falling

AzkadelliaBlast94

EisForElephant

Xassiopea

koipond-tea

Sam0728

orcafan1

catchingpansycakes

Ya'll are my favorite!

-Lana


	7. Chapter 7

"WAKE UP!" A term I was so desperately sick of hearing once again rang out before the sun rose. But for once a smile spread across my face as Four's voice registered in my head. I didn't care if it was Max who woke us up that morning as long as it wasn't Eric. Britney hadn't returned from the infirmary last night, which was something that should had bothered me, but surprisingly didn't. She had never come to get me out of the 'timeout room'

"Thank god Four is back, Eric creeped me out," Alice whisper as she sat on the bottom of my bed to put on her new shoes.

"Yeah, he's a dumbass," I muttered remember the scene I had walked away from last night. I shouldn't have ran, I should have punched his ass out cold. But at the same time, why should I care, he was nothing to me and I was nothing to him. He held my hair when I was sick. That was all.

My Amity was showing.

"I wouldn't go that far…but yeah," Alice decided not to touch on clearly a sore subject. Maybe my sharp tone would pass for not being a morning person.

We followed Four back into the training room where, just like yesterday, a chart showed who we would be fighting. I noted I was on top of the list next to the boy Matt fought yesterday, Alex. I had never really paid attention to Alex before, he was quiet and usually kept his head down. But I also knew he had beaten Matt, a boy just about his size yesterday in five minutes. I couldn't remember anything else about him. But you learn at an early age in Amity the small silent thing are killers.

Ticks, Bees, Snakes.

Was Alex a silent killer?

"He's strong, don't let him get you down,"

When had he come in? Eric was standing behind me whispering in my ear like nothing had happened yesterday.

"I didn't ask," I stormed up onto the mat to escape out of his bubble.

Alex finally came into the ring without a show of emotion on his face where I have already feeling the heat of anger on my face.

I almost felt bad for him.

Almost.

Until out of nowhere he punched me straight in the face, hard. After that I don't know what happened, I snapped. I tackled him and got him down on the ground pulling back and punching him in the face repeatedly even when my fingers hurt so bad I thought they would fall off.

Everything I'd held in for the past sixteen years came out, my mom teaching me to be kind and patient. Punch.

Half my time in Amity spent in the time out room. PUNCH.

Britney only attempting to befriend me after we left. PUNCH.

Thinking about how hungry I was. I pulled my leg back into a kick.

Eric not only sleeping with one girl, but two. PUNCH.

The fact I even cared about who Eric slept with. I gabbed him in the throat.

Finally the fact that Alex punched me in the face before I was ready and his face was really hurting my hand.

"Lana. Lana!" Four came up from behind me as I continued to punch. Finally noticing he was out. Something I also didn't notice was that tears were running down my face.

"You okay?" Four asked tearing me off Alex.

"I'm fine," I answered after taking a deep breath, "He caught me off guard, I wasn't ready," I tried to justify myself.

"Well, you need to go to the infirmary, I think your fingers are broken," I looked down at my blood covered hands where my fingers were shifted in all different directions.

"I'll take her," Eric spoke grabbing the back of my arm.

"No, I'm fine. I don't need to go," I pulled my arm out of his disgusting hands.

"You need to go, I'll bring you, Eric you watch them," Four grabbed my hand on the other side.

"This is your job FOUR, I'm bring her," and he didn't wait for a response as he forcefully pulled me out into the hall.

"What the fuck was that Lana?" he yelled pulling me into an empty side hall. "Four practically had to rip you off him, what were you trying to kill him?"

"What do you mean what was that? I was fighting," I took a breath to keep from punching him in the face, "Isn't that what you want us to do?"

"We want you to show your strong, brave, and can take a hit," He continued to yell, "Not a damn cold blooded killer,"

"Oh, god to hell," I pushed his heavy body out of my way, refusing to run away this time. I slowly walked down a stone ally, I wasn't quite sure where I was going. I continued to walk around Dauntless, searching for the infirmary, dripping blood from my hands the whole way.

"Where are you going Lan?" John's voice traveled down the hallway as I heard his heavy boot bang against the floor to catch up with me.

"What is it asshole day?" I huffed as he fell into pace with me.

"No, apparently it's bitch day," he laughed by himself, I refused to join in, "What's wrong, tell Uncle John," he reached out to grab me when he noticed my hands, "Well tell me on the way to the doctors,"

"Why does everyone think something is wrong?" I asked following John back down the hall I had already traveled down.

"Because it looks like you punched a brick wall until it broke," he glanced back over at my hands, "I'd hate to see what the other person looked like?" He kept trying to joke with me, and he was almost breaking through.

"He wasn't complaining when I left," a smile spread across my sore face for the first time that day.

"So you're not going to tell me what's wrong?" John stretched his long body up towards the ceiling.

"Did you just wake up?" I asked hoping for a distraction from the conversation he was trying to start.

"Guilty, I was on the way to find Eric and food when I saw a blood trail."

The mention of his name automatically made my blood boil.

"Don't you have a job?" I asked in a tone even I would admit was rude.

"Meow, bitch. Yes I have a job, I'm in charge of the Fence Gang." We turned a corner that lead to a large step of stone stair cases. I couldn't help take a deep breath thinking about climbing the stairs.

"Sorry," I muttered stepping up the first step.

"That's okay giiirl," he spoke in a girly voice flipping his hand.

"Why are you so nice to me?" I asked hauling my body up the best I could without holding onto anything.

"You remind me of myself," he spoke from a step above me.

"How so?" I needed to stop to catch a breath already.

"Well first of all, you need help up the stairs, but you'd never let anyone," he turned to meet my eyes without even taking a breath.

"I need more than help, I need an oxygen tank," I joked leaned against the bannister.

"You are holding something inside, just like I was, and you won't be complete or ready until you face whatever it is," How did this boy get so deep, he look just like a pile of muscle on muscle. But inside I knew he was right, I was holding something in that I couldn't even admit to myself if I had to. "It might come out punching some helpless boy in the face, or in the second set of training, but either way it's got to be faced, or it will eat away at you forever,"

"So what is your deep secret John?" I asked finally taking another step.

"I'll show you mine, when you show me yours," he tapped my butt as I passed him on the stairs. "Come on slacker, were almost there."

Once we finally made it to the top, I was glad to see a Dr's door. The nurses and Dr's in Dauntless looked nothing like the amity group. I never thought I'd take medical advice from a nurse with a pink hair.

"They aren't broken, just out of place," she said nothing more as she grabbed my blood hands and a sickening snap filled the examining room as John's pulled in a breath threw his teeth; the other one snapped even louder.

"There," she spoke as she walked out of the room.

**That was all? Snap. There. **

The Dauntless were crazier than I thought.

"Hey Lana,"

I heard Britney's weak voice as I stepped back out into the main room after washing my hands.

"Well this is where I leave you," John spoke without waiting for a response left out the front door.

"So what happened yesterday?" Brit asked as we followed John's footsteps out the front door.

Walking down the stairs I filled her in on who won the fights, and about Alice and I getting our belly button's pierced.

"You hung out with her after she knocked me out?" Brit questioned in a bitchy tone.

"If she didn't win you would have," I turned to look at her, "One of you had to lose," I couldn't believe what she was saying.

"Yeah, well I'm your friend not her," Brit snapped, and if she had the strength to she would have stormed off.

"You chose an awfully strange time to be friends with me Brit, sixteen years after our birth!" I yelled louder than I meant to.

"Yeah well, I couldn't have been friends with you back then **ALANA **there wasn't enough room in that damn box for both of us!"

I couldn't hear anymore and for the third time this week I stormed away.

* * *

AN: I know it's kind of confusing what's going on with Alana and the time out room, but it will all come out in good time.

Reviews for Updates.


	8. Chapter 8

"Remember, here at Dauntless, we take the term faction before blood seriously," Eric was standing up at the top of one of the staircases overlooking the pit talking to us transfers.

"Will anyone from Amity show?" Alice asked from beside me.

"Britney's family will show," I couldn't help but look over at Britney who still hadn't spoke to me since our little disagreement yesterday. "Mine, never." Britney noticed I was looking in her direction and turned to talk to Matt before giving me an ugly look and taking his hand. "What about yours?" I turned my head back towards Alice.

"Maybe, but it's highly unlikely," she spoke reaching up to her fresh bruises from her fight with Kyle yesterday, which she lost.

"Mine won't either," Kyle creeped up behind us.

"Well, we'll just have to find something to do together today," Alice began talking to Kyle about tattoos as I silently scanned the room with my eyes until I was met with Alex's face and guilt filled my chest. I began thinking about what John had said, whatever I was holding back would fly out one day; what about if I had killed him? I could have easily killed John as well, pushed him down the stairs. Maybe I was just crazy, I wasn't exactly sure what exactly it was I was keeping locked inside.

But I no longer had time to process this information as a group of parents rounded the corner of the pit, sadly, mine was included.

"Alana, baby." My mom spoke reaching up to my face when they were in arms reach.

"Hi Mom," I tried to smile at her when she touched the ever present knot on my head.

"Alana, what happened to your face?" my Father's deep voice questioned in a firm tone.

"Initiation happened Father, we all look the same."

"Violence is so senseless Alana," he spoke in a tone that was a close as a good Amity man go to angry.

"Yes Father, in Amity it is, here it's different," I argued with my father.

"I guess this is what happened when your daughter picks war instead of love Eileen," My father spoke to my mother "She forgets her manners, is that Britney Graceson ?" he asked in my direction.

"Yes, that's her,"

"Well, let's greet her," He spoke muttering something to my mom about another disappointment. Following in my Father's footsteps we traveled over towards Brit.

"Alana, a word please," my mom spoke as she pulled me in the opposite direction, "I've talked to the group honey, they'll allow you back in if you just repent."

"What?" I questioned confused as she continued to lead me down a hall, like she knew where she was going, "Mom, where are we going?"

"You just need to repent Alana," she grabbed my arm pulling me forward in a harsh tug. "Mom." I yelped, trying to pull my arm out of her grasp.

"You can come back with me baby, my sweet baby," she continued to drag me. "When you were gone for that month, I missed you so much, now you've been gone for four days and I can't stand it,"

Gone for a month?

"Mom, where did I go for a month?" I shifted memories in my head, "I never left,"

"Yes you did baby, your father's father, he fixed you. Almost perfectly," She had a crazy look in her eye.

I kept trying to escape her grasp, but I was so weak from fighting and lack of food.

"Mom, please stop. I never left." My voice cracked as tears fell from my eyes. Scaring me even further, a heavy hand covered my mouth.

"He almost fixed you, my father," my dad whispered in my ear, "But he was sick, just like you." He kept his hand over my mouth, dragging me in whatever direction my mom had been dragging me before. "He could never find peace within him, all he cared about was books, facts." He paused to swallow while I continued to fight out of his grasp. "But not only my family is to blame, your mother's family only cared about violence and strength, much like you, they were wrong as well, neither of them could see the wrong in their ways, but not my sweet daughter, we are going to show you yours, but first Alana, you must repent,"

We had stopped moving as my mother opened up a small utility closet, barley big enough for a broom.

"Tell us the wrong in your ways Lana," my mother spoke as she and my father shoved me into the closet.

I was completely taken by what was happening, where had I gone? What had my grandfather done to fix me? Banging was heard against the door as they yelled for me to find my inner peace.

All too soon the thoughts of the _'time out room.'_ Filled my mind a small tight hot box in the middle of the town, it was made for children, once you were too big for it they would shove you in, all your limbs going numb, all your fluids sweating out of your body.

"MOM, LET ME OUT!" I banged my messed up hands against the door.

"Tell us…" My father hissed against the door.

"MOM! I never left.." I continued to bang on the door. Panic spread all throughout my body, my ears rang like when I had head-butted Kyle.

"Alana, do it," she whispered against the door.

"MOM, help me please!" the walls were moving in closer as I began to heavily sweat. "Mom, please!" I slide down the back wall of the cubby, my feet hitting the door when I did the space was so small.

"Baby, find peace,"

"I have mom, without you, I'm happy here, I belong here," I cried into the room. The only light coming in under the door that my parents stood guard. "I rather die than go back,"

Before my parents had a chance to respond an OMPH was heard along with crying of my mother, after a second I could hear the sound of fists against skin as the ringing in my ears died down.

"This is your fault Alana," my mother's voice filled the small space and then I heard nothing else from them as the light from under the door spread to the whole length as the door was ripped open.

I stood ready to fight for my life, ready to kill my father if that's what it took.

"It's okay Lana," John's voice filled the room as he tugged my out of the room as gently as possible. When my eyes adjusted to the light I saw my mother in the corner crying and my father's bloody frame on the ground with Eric standing over it, his body covered in blood as well, but there was one thing I was sure of it wasn't his.

"Get her out of here, I'll take care of this," Eric spoke to John as he began dragging me down the hall towards the pit.

Turning back around I saw Eric lift my half dead father by the collar of his yellow shirt, shaking him as he did so and my mother's green eyes, my eyes, fill with tears and fear, before we rounded the corner.

Passing the pit John continued to drag me as I breathed in heavy the whole time.

Great another set of stairs, but John had remembered from before and didn't wait for permission as he lifted me up carrying me to the top.

Within minutes we were outside the apartment I couldn't get out of my memory.

"Lana, you're okay, you're safe," John kept repeating as he sat me gently on the couch.

"Thank you, thank you." That was the only thing that would come out of my mouth as I rested my head against his shoulder that soon would be filled with tears.

* * *

For the second time that week I woke up in Eric's apartment, only this time John was still there.

"Why were they doing that? I should have killed him," Eric heavy feet could be heard pacing the floor.

"I'm sure she would have loved you killing her parents Eric,"

"What if you hadn't seen her being dragged, we might have never found her. Who knows what could have happened,"

"Eric she's safe,"

The room silenced out as I slipped back into sleep again.


	9. Chapter 9

Eric's Pov

What the fuck was I doing? I questioned myself as John and I sat on my couch watching Lana's body roll around on my bed. Had I really beaten her family to a pulp for locking her in a closet, I probably wouldn't even beat mine for doing it to me. If I had had a knife I would have slit their throats. What was this girl doing to me? I quickly stood up alerting John.

"Where are you going man?" he asked as I pulled on the boots she had gotten me and made my way to the door.

"Going to get a drink and find Sarah, get her out of here when she wakes up," I told John in my big leader voice, something he never listened to.

"Are you kidding me Eric?" his eyebrow lifted above its usual position, "Her parent's just tried to kill her, and you want me to send her ass back home?"

"Exactly," I slipped on my vest.

"What the fuck are you doing man?" John stood up making his way over towards me.

"It's not what I'm doing, it's what this bitch is doing to me," I growled in his direction.

"What melting your ice heart Eric, you're going to blow it," John stood crossing his arms around his large chest, his chiseled arms flexed from a year of working on the fence.

"What heart John, I don't care about anything but booze, smokes and getting laid,"

"Yeah Eric, no heart, that is why I'm working in the position I'm in, living in a nice ass apartment with you, with Tori."

"You did all that on your own John, I had nothing to do with any of that!"

"Really Eric, Really!" John snapped at me pushing me against the door. "I was ranked fourth, I'm a leader of the gang, living in an apartment instead of a room filled with bunk beds, Tori met me giving you tattoos, all that you did for me, and you know I'm not stupid."

"I did that because you would have done the same for me JOHN!"I passed to collect my thoughts, "You lost your fights from being so tired from staying up helping me train to beat Four, you were better at me in the sims, and I still won, thanks to the fighting. I owed you!" I shoved him back.

"That's called a heart Eric!"

"I can't deal with this now," I turned for the door, "Get her out of here!"

* * *

Lana's POV

I was lightly being shaken by a large set of hands.

"Come on, I've got something for you," John tugged me towards the door once I finally opened my eyes.

"Where are we going?" my voice was cracked from crying and yelling earlier.

"Just trust me, you need something," he made his way towards the door as I followed him. Heading down the hall we made it to a purple apartment door about fifteen doors down, he didn't knock as he entered the apartment.

"Honey, I'm home!" he yelled in a sarcastic tone, down the small entry way of the apartment. Tori was sitting on a small burgundy couch near a fireplace made into the ever present rock wall all through the dauntless compound.

"This girl needs food," He spoke as he pressed his lips against her forehead.

"Did you miss lunch?" she asked in a harsh tone.

"Oh cut the shit Tor, she doesn't eat meat either,"

Her eye stretched as he talked back to her,

"So your starving to death then?" she asked standing to go into a tiny kitchen attached to the living room.

"I eat apples, and lettuce," I answered still out of it, from the situation before.

"Starving," she corrected me.

"Starving," I agreed.

"You need nutrition when you fight," Tori informed me as she dug through the ice box.

I took the time to examine the room while she continued digging. The walls of the place were painted in a deep blue with graffiti like paintings on the wall, most of them consisted of dragons, birds and dauntless signs.

"Does everyone get apartments like this?" I asked out loud to either of the people in the room.

"No, only top ranked," John answered glancing around the apartment.

"Where is your apartment?" I asked him twirling a pencil that was on the counter between my fingers.

"I live with Eric, I wasn't ranked high enough, he simply was inlove with me and wanted to keep me close," he joked slapping Tori's butt while she was bent over.

"It probably went more like, John wouldn't take no for an answer when Eric tried to toss his ass," her voice became louder as she pulled herself out of the fridge bringing groceries with her.

"I'm shocked, when did he tell you?" John asked pressing his palm against his heart while the other pressed to his forehead dramatically.

"Eat this," she slammed a plate full of food onto the counter.

"What is it?" I moved the food around with my fork.

"A meat substitute the erudite made," she didn't bother to explain the rest of the plate, it consisted of fruits and real vegetables other than lettuce.

The food was like eating gold, it slipped down my throat and I instantly felt renewed. Refreshed.

As I ate Tori continued rummaging around the kitchen; fixing a second plate.

"Awe babe, what are you making me?" John sat down on the chair beside me against the small counter.

"Not shit, this is hers too," she laughed setting another small plate beside my larger one.

"They are vitamins, take those then eat the cake," she ordered making her way back into the living room to finish doing whatever she was working on before.

John stretched across the counter sticking his finger in the frosting of the cake; before I had a chance to slap his hand away Tori interrupted us.

"Leave her cake alone John," she warned without looking up from her paper.

"Tori, do you want a roommate?" I asked laughing as John pouted beside me on the counter.

* * *

AN:Filler chapter. So, four updates in one day. Boredom of spring vacation sets in. I realize I am slacking in the description department, but I've never tried to

write anything before and I'm working on it. (wish me luck) and thank you to everyone for giving me helpful hints.

Let me know what you think!


	10. Chapter 10

"Time estimate Four?" Eric asked Four while the group of us stood by train tracks. They had woken us up in the middle of the night yelling something about 'War Games,' but it was too early to contemplate what they were talking about, somehow Eric and Four were wide awake, along with the Dauntless born, who were jumping out of their skin in excitement.

"Why are we out here in the middle of the night?" Alice startled coming up from behind me.

"Because Four and Eric are into torturing us," I smirked, not sure if she could see my face in the dark.

"I can think of much better ways to spend the night with Four then waiting for a train," Alice spoke in a light voice.

"Girl, preach," a girl I had never seen before walked up beside Alice, she must have been a Dauntless born. "Four is constantly hit on, and never goes for it," she paused to look in his direction, "But he still looks damn good," our laughs filled the air, which earned us an ugly look from Eric.

"oh no, Mr. Personality heard us," the unnamed girl continued on, "He doesn't like fun," she continued to laugh tilting her head in Eric's direction. "I think that almost makes him better looking as well,"

"Does he avoid the girls too?," Alice interrupted, trying to keep the conversation with the girl going.

"Eric? Oh yeah, and he loves it, haven't you heard about him?" she asked in an offended tone. "Oh I forget you're not from here," she answered her own question. "He's a bag'em kind of guy,"

"A what?" I asked in her direction, while my eyes shifted over to Eric who was having a quiet conversation with one of the Dauntless born.

"He takes them to his room, has his way with them, and kicks them out," she huffed, "He doesn't want anything to do with anyone, except for his friend John," she laughed thinking of the duo.

"Why is he and John so close?" Alice questioned her.

"They transferred here together, I guess they've been friends their whole life,"

"Eric is a transfer?" I hissed in the girl's direction, the train turned the corner making it harder to have a private conversation.

"Yeah, two years ago I think," that was the only information she gave me as she took off running for the train, coming to our senses Alice and I began running after her, after my meal earlier with John and Tori I already felt stronger, faster, more level headed, given the right motivation, I probably could out run the train.

When I finally pulled myself onto the train, everyone else was against the walls gasping for breath, even Four and Eric, no matter how many times you get on the train, it still takes every bit of breath you have.

After everyone had collected themselves Eric began explaining what we were doing out in the middle of the night, but all that kept running through my mind was the information the girl had given me, all I heard of his speech her some key words.

Capture the Flag, Guns. Teams.

I couldn't help but let my mind wander, Eric was a transfer? Looking at him you never would believe it, he exuded Dauntless. He was tall, strong, had muscles onto of muscles, brave, pierced, tattooed, and cold as stone. Wasn't that the criteria of Dauntless? But more importantly, her words ran through my head _'bag-em,'_ he apparently had a parade of woman running through his room, so the two girls I had seen weren't just a one time deal? Instantly anger filled my body thinking about him kicking the girls out in the middle of the night, probably with his dumb smirk on his face.

"Lana!"

Four's voice pulled me out of my thought process.

"What?" I asked in a snooty voice, why had he interrupted.

"Your on my team, aren't you listening?" Four spoke back as he motioned me closer.

"Oh, yeah." I wouldn't let him know I was zoned out, god only knows what they would do to you for that.

Maybe throw you in a box like Amity.

The thought made goose bump spread over my body. What had my father meant about my grandfather made me forget? Where had I gone?

"Wake up Lana," Kyle's voice spoke "Your team just jumped off!" I did a quick survey of the train and noticed Four was gone and jumped right off into the unknown.

"I was wondering if you were coming," Alice laughed as I pulled myself off the ground.

"Yeah, I was thinking!" I told her honestly, there was never any sense in lying to a Candor anyways,

"I noticed, I grabbed you a gun," she handed me a paint ball gun, and a thing of ammo.

"Paint balls, really, I figured they'd just use the real thing," I laughed.

"Didn't you hear, Eric said he wished they could, and I quote 'we use paintballs, because they won't let us really shoot you,'" Alice laughed as I swung the gun over my shoulder and followed our group.

"So what is your plan," Four spoke once we had finished walking and grouped up.

"Well where did they go?" a dauntless born spoke from behind a tall boy, you couldn't see her.

"Well they are in front of us," I said, I thought it would be obvious, "they got off the train second, and the train only goes in one direction."

"Thank you captain obvious." Four laughed.

"Hey I'm just trying to be helpful!" I laughed back. I thought I had been.

"Nice try!" the girl from earlier voice came up. Now that we were in better moon light I could see her. She was about mine and Alice's height, with a nose and lip piercing, her long curly natural red hair had even brighter red tips, and she was rail thin.

"My name is Becky, by the way," she spoke making herself at home between Alice and I.

"You need a plan, Eric and his group will have one," Four spoke again trying to get us to play the game.

"Maybe this one had an idea," Becky said over the group that began fighting over a plan. Instantly I knew what she meant.

"Yeah," I yelled out, "We know they are in front of us, they know we are behind them." I paused thinking everyone else would get on our wavelength.

"We know that! You clearly didn't come from Erudite," the tall boy spoke.

"Well what about if we fool them, they are only going to be looking in this direction!"

Four smiled catching on, "So what's your plan Lana?"

"Go wide on both sides, once we see them and pass them, keep going and meet up behind them. Sneak up behind them. Shoot them. Get their flag!" I said with a smile spreading across my face. As the group started arguing on who was going to shoot and who was going to find the flag.

The dauntless born, they wanted to shoot.

"Alice and I will get the flag!" I volunteered.

"But its Eric's team, he's not going to let us win that easy," The tall rude boy spoke again.

"You don't worry about Eric, I'll take care of that," Four had the biggest smile I'd even seen on.

"He's probably with the flag," A girl's voice spoke out.

"No," I confirmed in her direction, "Eric isn't going to miss a chance to shoot something,"

* * *

The funniest thing about passing a group looking so hard from you is staring at them when they don't know it.

As our group passed them wide in the woods we could just barley make out Eric's team in the woods. They were standing clearly in the middle of a field, hoping to lure us in, and as I predicted, they were all looking left, right and forward, none of them behind where their flag was, right in plain sight.

"You were right," Four startled me while we passed whoever they had sent to get out flag, creeping past us without know it. We had left people behind for them.

"Thank _you _captain obvious," I replied smartly.  
"They don't suspect a thing," he continued talking keeping in pace with me.

"Eric took all the bronze, none of the brain." I tapped my head, a smirk spreading.

" No, I took all the brains none of the bronze," Four joked as we finally passed the group and headed towards the middle, meeting up with the other half of the group.

"Ready?" Four quietly questioned the group. Receiving a bunch of nods, we took off in their direction as quietly as possible.

Until the shots took off, alerting the group for the first time.

"BEHIND US!" a voice yelled out once it was far too late and the attack had already began, silently I grabbed Alice's hand pulling her in the direction of the flag we saw earlier.

Paint balls were flying everywhere as we crept over, the florescent flag stood out in the middle, no one around it.

"It's too easy," Alice said looking around from a big rock we were hiding behind. Luckily, the sound of the war was covering up our voices.

She was right. Someone was watching the flag.

A giggle caught my ear, as we crouched thinking.

Brit.

She was standing on top of the rock, looking in front of the rock, instead of behind where we were.

Without saying another word I grabbed Alice's arm, and pointed up at Brit. Ali nodded her head in understanding.

Before we could get Brit down Four's voice spread across the field.

"GET IT LANA COME ON!"

Without another thought Alice jumped on top of the rock shooting Brit as I ran for the flag. A smile spread across my face as I touched the flag, and it grew even larger as Eric came into sight just before I got it, a growl exited his mouth as I grabbed it between my hand and my group cheered!

The only thing I did in reply to his growl was give him a long exacerbated wink.

AN: Have I said I don't own Divergent and Characters? Because I don't.

Review pretty please?

-Lana


	11. Chapter 11

Eric's POV

"Are you ready to get beat again?" Four asked as we headed out to the train tracks to play capture the flag.

"Last time you just got lucky," I snarled in his direction as the initiates filled out of the compound and out into the night air.

They joined the roar of Dauntless born that were already dying to play.

The last of the people out of the compound, were Alice and Lana, they looked like they had about two minutes of sleep.

"Oh good they made it," a snide comment came from beside me, I turned my head to notice it was the other Amity girl, _what was her name anyway?_

"Yeah, they wouldn't miss a chance to show off," The guy standing beside the Amity girl spoke, I looked them over noticing they were holding hands.

"Time estimate Four?" I questioned him as the group bunched up, knowing it made him uncomfortable to have to answer to me.

"Really Eric, it's been two years, you can't learn the damn schedule?" Four snapped in my direction as a smirk spread across my face.

"I've got you, you're like my little one man assistant, I have no further use for technology." I spoke loud enough for the group to hear me put him down. I began looking around proud at myself when I heard laughs, but I noticed it wasn't because of what I said, and my smirk instantly disappeared.

Lana, Alice, and a Dauntless born were huddled up talking about something quietly, I took the chance to look Lana over up and down. She was standing their barley clad in black spandex shorts and a black tank top with a red beanie slouched on the back of her head covering the top of her long brown hair.

Dressed like a true flower child.

"You're so lucky you get to do this shit every year man!" A half-drunk dauntless born Kevin, spoke to me, but I only half listened to what he said as I continued to steal glances at the group of girls.

Once the train finally rounded the corner and we were all boarded on we stood catching our breath before Four and I began explaining the rules and picking teams, she wasn't listening the whole time, she continued to just stare into space.

"You can choose first," Four spoke to me in an attempt to insult me.

"No, I insist you really need the help," I poked back at him.

"Fine. Lana!" he spoke looking at me as he said it, _why did he look at me?_

Once he said her name Lana literally had to shake her head to pull herself back onto earth.

"What?" she snapped in Four's direction, I couldn't help but smirk at the tone she took with him as he explained she was on his team.

After we had split the group up into two teams, I told Four's group to get off first, so I would know exactly where they were, and they all quickly jumped out the door as the train rounded another corner, all but one.

"Wake up Lana," The boy with a matching head bump to her's spoke, "Your team just jumped off,"

As soon as she acknowledged his voice and surveyed the train she jumped off.

"What an idiot!" The other Amity girl spoke when she was finally off the train.

"Britney, she's way ahead of you, so idiot or not, try to be more like her," Head bump guy spoke.

All he earned back was a huff from the whiney girl.

"Okay, initiates, lets go," I didn't wait for a response as I jumped out of the train.

I played the game a little differently than four would, I didn't give them a chance to make a plan, I'd been working on it since losing to Four once again last year.

"Here is the plan, we know where they are," I pointed back into the woods of the direction they had jumped. "We are going to put the flag in plain sight, and wait for them to come get it," I didn't take any of the mumbling into consideration.

"You dumbass," I spoke in the Amity girls direction, "You guard the flag," a smile spread across her face, "Don't get excited, not because of your skill, because they will never get past us for you to be of any use," when she started to pout I felt my heart start to beat, loving wrecking this girls day. "Stand on the rock, out of the way,"

With that we took to our guard and waited.

"What if they are doing the same thing over there?" A dauntless born girl, Emma, spoke in my direction, the piercings in her lips made a sharp metal scratching nose against her teeth.

I hadn't thought of that, Four with a good plan?

"You two," I pointed at the Amity girl's boyfriend and Kyle beside him, "Go find their flag,"

I believed in sacrificing a few to save many.

But about five minutes after they were gone, sound of paintballs flying were coming, from behind us. Everywhere they hit they splattered, leaving stains on trees, clothes, buildings, anything.

I weaved and ducked out of range trying to move closer to the flag to protect it, until I saw Four sneak behind a rock.

I would get his this time.

We began shooting at each other from different blocks, both of us missing by just barley a hair.

I heard a click of his gun, he was out of ammo, I smiled as I stood up to get right into his face, pressing the gun to his head, ready to pull the trigger.

Click.

My gun was empty too.

"GET IT LANA!" Four yelled throwing both our guns onto the ground, hauling ass in the direction of the flag.

I ran so fast I though my lungs were going to explode, but not fast enough, her hand wrapped around the bright orange flag before I could reach her and I let out a harpy screech.

In response all she did was wink.

* * *

"Eric we've got to write up ranking to post tomorrow," Four yelled down the hall way in my direction after we had got back from capture the flag. The last thing I wanted to do was spend the rest of my night with Four.

"We can do it tomorrow morning," I shrugged off once he fell into step with me.

"We can't I'm busy tomorrow, remember the initiates are going with their ranking job tomorrow," Four reminded me.

Max had come up with some plan to motivate the transfers to move up in their ranking, showing them what job they would be placed in if they were accepted tomorrow.

"Oh shit, so I'm stuck with one of them tomorrow too," I muttered directing Four to his apartment, he definitely wasn't going to mine.

Once we settled down in his dank kitchen he brought out the chalk board we had used for the past years as he twisted the chalk in his fingers.

"So who is number one?" I asked ready to get this over.

"Lana."

"Lana?" I questioned thinking of the girl who had been filing my thoughts for days, who was freshly running through after watching her face grabbing the flag.

"Yes, she won both of her fights, was the first one to hit a target, first jumper, it was her plan tonight, and she was the one who got the flag,"

I had been so tied up in who she was I hadn't been thinking about all she had accomplished, she was head of her initiate class without even trying.

"The only set back she had was her fight with Alex, she lost control, it should have moved her down, but she's so far ahead of second after tonight it doesn't matter," Four continued on.

"Who is second?" I questioned, I couldn't argue about Lana, Four was right.

"Alice," Four made his point for Alice, yakking away.

Finally two hours later we had made the final charts on ranks and who was going home.

* * *

Lana's POV

"Today you will be going on a little field trip," Max's deep voice echoed through the pit as he spoke to us the next morning. "But before you know where you're going, you have to know where you are," Once he finished his little speech Four came forward holding a chart and Eric smugly followed behind.

"Okay initiates," Eric spoke in a rude tone, " this is your first ranking, bottom two, you're out," he spoke the words like they meant nothing to him.

But I no longer let that bother me as the board turned around in Four's arms.

_Number one? I was number one? I couldn't be._

But there is was plain as day, or white as chalk.

Alice's arm wrapped around my shoulders as I allowed my eyes to move down the list

**Lana**

**Alice**

**Alex**

**Kyle**

**Matt**

**Britney**

**Cara**

**Nolan**

The final two names on the list were people I hadn't even spoken too, they kept to themselves and didn't seem to care that they were on the bottom, they shrugged and went on their way. I would have lost my mind.

But way in the back of my mind I wondered if they were braver then me, they had accepted that they didn't belong and weren't putting up a fight, bravely taken the train to wherever it would lead them.

"Okay, those of you left," Max spoke once again to the group of us. "You're going with the job that due to your rank you'd be assigned to,"

"Number 6 Britney, Kitchen," she muttered something about having no cooking skill before she went off with some old lady in a hair net.

"Five, Guard faction less," Once again Matt went off with his respected field trip guardian.

"Four, Fence guard,"

"Three, Fence Leader," Alex got to go with John who waved his hand in Alex's direction as they stalked off.

"Two, Control room," Alice sent me a large smirk when she saw she was spending the day with Four.

A pit dropped to the bottom of my stomach as I saw who was left in the room.

"Number One, Leader."

With that Max turned away, leaving me with Eric.

"Just great," I muttered moving closer to him.

"What was that initiate?" he spoke in a gravelly voice.

"I said, 'oh yay great,'"

"That's' what I thought, come on." He didn't wait for me to follow, walking out of the door.

"Where are we going?" I asked when I finally feel into step with Eric.

"Meetings," he mutter sounding just as excited as I did, thinking about going from fighting and war games to sitting in a room listening to meetings.

Leading me past all the usual places, he continued speed walking until we got outside the compound. Instantly the sun felt warm on my skin, that was exposed from being in a tank top. I stopped walking to soak in the feeling of being outside again, a light breeze blew through my hair and the smell of the fresh air almost brought tears to my eyes. Eric must have noticed I wasn't following beside him because he had stopped a few feet ahead of me.

"Come on, what is it with Amity and the outdoors?" he begrudgingly asked me; tapping his foot in annoyance.

"I'm not Amity anymore," I grunted shoving past him, mad he had ruined my moment.

* * *

Eric's POV

"Watch yourself initiate. you're not Dauntless yet either," that shut her up. But I knew she would be.

"Where is the damn train," I spoke more to myself than anything as we waited by the tracks.

"We are leaving Dauntless?" she asked shifting around beside me.

"No, I'm waiting for the train just to watch it go by, it's my day to count the compartments," I snapped at her stupid question.

"Well in that case, you'll probably need to borrow some of my fingers, you only have ten,"

"Get on the train bitch," I shoved her with more force then I wanted to, to which she only laughed running to get on.

"Really," she took a gasp "where are we going?"

"You'll find out," I gasped back taking a seat knowing we would be on the train for a while.

After about an hour of listening to her huff, she decided to speak again. I slid my eyes open waiting, knowing it was coming.

"This is what a leader does?" she spoke from the other side of the train.

"Yes, we ride on the train, and when we get back act like we did something all day," I replied sarcastically,

"Don't forget harass the transfers,"

"No, I usually don't do that, you're just a special case,"

"You know I get that more often than not," she spoke back loud so the wind wouldn't steal away her words.

"Why doesn't that not surprise me?"

"Britney, she says that I'm the worst Amity ever," she spoke almost in an upset tone.

"Britney is a bitch, not even the good kind, and I thought you weren't Amity?" I questioned, why did I feel the need to comfort her?

"I'm not, I never was,"

She didn't say anything else till the train began to slow and she took a space in the window.

"Is that Erudite headquarters?" she asked as looking over the lit up part of the city,

"Yeah," I wasn't looking forward to going back, to the place I had so desperately escaped years ago.

"It's so…bright," she spoke continuing to stare.

"The scientists found a way to make it run on solar power, the lights are always on here," I grabbed he arm dragging her off the train with me, using my weight to balance her.

"You can't get dirty we are going to a meeting," I spoke holding her up.

"Yes sir,"

* * *

AN: I have next chapter done, but when I try to upload in Doc Manager it gives me an Error 2 Reading, but I haven't given up on the story just some glitch I guess Fanfiction has right now

-Lana


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I don't own anything, obviously. Also I'm sorry this took so long; I'm on spring break and I only have a few days a week with Wifi. But I haven't given up on the story.

* * *

Erudite was unlike anything I ever imagined, the place sparkled in cleanliness, every wall was painted a light shade of blue and the hall floors were granite, it was like a castle, a very expensive one.

A huff pulled me out of my dream state as Eric stood a few feet ahead of me staring.

"I'm coming, hold your horses," I spoke as my brain willed my legs to go faster.

"I hate horses, come on."

"You don't even know a horse, you just hate everything!" I smartly replied.

Left

Right

Left

Left

Eric led me in a complicated mess of halls and turns, he didn't even once have to stop and think about where he was, or if he was going in the right direction.

"How do you know where you are going, you can't even remember the train schedule?" I asked trying to keep in step with him through the maze.

He didn't seem pleased to have another question.

"Are you sure your test didn't say Erudite, what is with all the damn questions?" he muttered taking yet another turn.

"If it had said Erudite, I wouldn't need to ask, I'd already know," I answered in what I thought was a smart remark.

"Erudite don't know everything Lana, they are on the pursuit to learn,"

In his statement he answered my earlier question,

"You're from Erudite?"

That stopped him in his tracks, "You don't know anything _Alana,_" he spoke back in an ugly tone.

"Ah, Eric, there you are, I've been waiting on you," A blonde woman stuck her head around the corner, she looked so familiar. Eric walked up to her, acting like we had never had the conversation.

"Jeanine," Eric spoke to the woman once we got closer, the woman, Jeanine, was in a business two piece, both a dark blue, with short blonde hair, blue shoes and a blue folder.

The only thing on her that wasn't blue was her muddy brown eyes, eyes I instantly knew I didn't trust. Subconsciously I inched closer to Eric, already feeling uncomfortable.

"Eric who have you brought with you,"

"Lana," I spoke reaching my hand out to her, I didn't want Eric to share too much.

"Well Lana, what brings you to Erudite?" she asked looking me up and down before setting off down the hall while we followed.

"Ranking.."

Instantly Eric interrupted me, "She is shadowing me for the day, job positioning."

She seemed to except that for an answer continuing down the hallway.

"_Don't say anything about initiation," _Eric hissed pulling me close.

"So Lana, are you enjoying Erudite headquarters?" She asked without turning her head.

"Yeah, it's nice," I didn't know where she was going with this.

"Good, Josh," we entered into a waiting room, "Show Ms. Eversong around,"

How did she know who I was?

"Eversong? Is she here to see Paul?"

'**He was sick like you. All he cared about was books. Facts.' **My father's voice rang in my head.

"Yes, I'm here for Paul, lead the way Josh," I motioned my head towards the door, following Josh's lead.

"Lana!" Eric warned.

"Enjoy your meeting Eric, don't leave without me,"

I sent him a smile as I rounded the corner.

I was half listening to josh's incessant yapping explaining every room or section of Erudite we passed. I couldn't take my mind off of my dad's speech while he pushed me into the utility closet, at the time it hadn't meant anything, now I wished I had a recording of it to repeat over to myself.

"Paul will be in the lab, he's always in the lab." Josh confirmed without seeing into the lab. The door to the lab slide open gracefully, like the doors of the small store in the factionless part of town, it didn't sell anything, but before the war it was a convenient store.

"Paul, Lana Eversong here to see you," Josh spoke to an old man hunched over in the corner over a lab table, where multiple beakers and magnifying glasses sat.

"Ah Lana, I hypothesized you'd show up eventually," he turned to look at me, his green eyes glaring into mine, his lips were so light it matched all the skin around his face, but you could tell they were pulled into a smile. "Thank you Josh," once Josh left the room and the door slide shut his smile feel.

"That was if your father didn't kill you first,"

"Are you my grandfather?" I asked already knowing the answer, he looked like an older version of my father.

"Yes," he looked me over, "You made the right decision by leaving them, Alana," he must have took my outfit as a sign I was no longer Amity.

"Why?"

"Your parents, they were blinded by the Amity, their ideas, it's beautiful, but how they project it into their lifestyle will never work," he sat on a spinning stool with his back to the table, turning his arm out inviting me into the seat in the corner.

"How long did he leave you in that box after you left?" Paul inquired pulling whatever he was working on into his hands, fidgeting with it.

"I don't remember any of this," I stopped to swallow, scanning my head for any clue, "Where did I go?"

"I don't know where you went, your mother's mother found you." He continued messing with the bit of metal in his hand. "I knew we had given you too much, it was Jeanine's first time administering the memory serum,"

"Jeanine? I've met her before?" I questioned pulling my chair closer to him.

"Yes, you've met your aunt many times before,"

"My AUNT?"

"Way too much serum," he still hadn't made eye contact since he sat down.

"What is the serum? What does it do?"

"It's for your memory, after you ran away Lana, your dad wanted you to forget your desire to leave, it wasn't the first time you attempted to go, his sister, Jeanine, would do anything for her brother, together they used my memory serum on you, I knew it was wrong, but I thought it would be my chance to make up my mistakes to your father, to help him with his wandering child. But it was a mistake Lana, your father is sick."

"A memory serum!?" I half shouted.

"To make you forget, in small doses it takes negative thoughts out of your head and replaces them with pleasant, but they gave you too much,"

"I was just a little kid, any amount was too much,"

"Alana, that was last year,"

* * *

AN: I have a polyvore for this story, link in my profile. It shows what the characters look like in this messed up head of mine! Reviews equal faster updates!


	13. Chapter 13

'_Alana, that was last year,'_

My grandfather's words kept passing through my mind, sitting on the train ride back with Eric, I hadn't got the chance to ask any more questions, the moment he told me Eric came through the door informing me we were leaving and Paul instantly turned his back to me and began tinkering on his project again.

"Who was that old man you were talking to?" Eric's voice got closer as I opened my eyes acknowledging him for the first time since we left. I hadn't realized he was sitting so close to me, but when I made eye contact with him he wasn't even two feet away,

"Um, some scientist guy I guess," I quickly lied to Eric, not wanting him to know what I was talking about with Paul.

Eric's pierced eyebrows rose in a manner of disbelief and a small smirk spread on his face.

"You make a habit of hanging out with old smart guys?"

Had he believed me?

"Well, since I've been in Dauntless I haven't come across any smart guys at all, except for Four," I smirked back at him, earning a snarl. I knew that would get him mind off Paul.

"Yeah Four, some smartass he is, you know they offer him Leadership every year and they turn him down?" Eric smirk was erased off his face and almost a sort of fear had replaced it, was this his problem with Four? He could replace Eric with a simple yes.

"I wouldn't want to be leader either," I informed him rubbing my hands down my arms, trying to keep the chill off of them from the open door of the train.

"Why would you not want to be leader, you're in control, people look up to you to tell them what to do," Eric had a sort of shimmer in his grey eyes.

"That's exactly why," to me it was simple.

"You don't want to tell people what to do? And they always have to listen!" Eric questioned standing up to take off his jacket and slung it over the back of my shoulders, heat instantly covering my body, the jacket smelled new but still had a twinge of manliness to it; Tabaco and mint.

"No, I've been the person struggling to follow the rules all my life, I don't want to make someone else feel the way I did,"

"Rules? You don't have rules in Amity, don't you live by the wind or some shit?" he took his place down beside me.

"Where did all that come from? Live by the wind? We have rules, tons of rules,"

He shrugged his shoulders and reached over towards my hand, my body tightened as I thought he was going to hold it, but he reached into the pocket of the jacket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

"Well, continue tell me about it," he said while lighting up.

"What do you want me to say? I didn't fit in, I left." I didn't add the part about it not being the first time I left. "Those will kill you, you know that right?" I nodded my head in the direction of the cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

"I think it would take a lot more than this to kill me," he informed me flicking the ashes off the end.

"Why did you leave Erudite?" I questioned him, snuggling further into the jacket.

He stopped and paused for a seconding thinking about the question, before puffing on the cigarette again, "I didn't fit in, I left,"

He stood up from the wall beside me and made his way over to the door of the compartment, where he stood for the whole rest of the ride.

* * *

"So how was being stuck with Four all day?" I teased Alice, once we met up at dinner.

"You know he's cute, but he doesn't have much of a personality." She laughed reaching to the middle of the table collecting her dinner. "How was being stuck with Eric?"

"He's cute with too much personality!" I joked with her.

"Cute? Eric," she shifted her head in the direction of the leaders table, looking Eric over.

"Yeah, he's cute, but I think his attitude over shadows it," she began eating her dinner.

"Did you know Dauntless has files on all of us?" she asked me while I bit into my usual apple.

"What kind of files? On Transfers?" I questioned twisting the steam of the apple.

"Yeah, on us, like where we came from, who our parents are, where they came from," she took a breath and a sip of her juice. "Four spends half of his day filling it into the computer in the control room, they keep transfers on paper until we are actually accepted into Dauntless"

'_Your mother's mother found you,'_

Paul's voice filled my mind again.

"Can anybody just get in there?" I inquired trying to act uninterested.

"Yeah, just walk in, I mean I don't think you'd have to long before someone saw you and kicked you out of there, but no one guards it," she answered.

"And you know the way back?" now she realized what I was doing.

"Yes," she smirked in my direction. "Why are we breaking into the control room?" her smile grew even bigger, the chance to do something devious.

"I need to find something out," I smirked back.

"About who? Find something out about Britney like what she's allergic to, feed it to her?"

"No killer!" I laughed, not a half bad idea. "About myself,"

"Oh," her smirk fell. "Well Four is always in there apparently, so we'd have to go while he was busy,"

"The only time he is busy is when he's training us" I spoke my plan already falling through.

"Well, we will have to go while he's distracted," her smile spread across her face again "But what do you want to know about yourself?"

"More about where I came from then myself, I need to know who my mom's mom is, I think she's in Dauntless,"

A confused look spread across her face, and for the first time in my life I knew I could trust her. I began with visiting day, explaining what my parents had told me, leaving out the part about Eric beating up my parents, and I explained what Paul told me.

"Your family sounds like it lives on the edge of insanity,"

You've got to love a candor.

"Probably, but I need to talk to her, I don't know my mom's original name."

"We'll get in there,"

At that moment the Candor was completely whipped off her face, and a Dauntless smirk spread across it.

* * *

"What are they going to do to us?" Britney muttered from across the room where we were all sitting, waiting for stage two of initiation.

"I bet they are going to cut open our head to see what makes us tick," Alice spoke from beside me loudly, hoping to freak Brit out.

"Oh good, I hope they make us eat some of our brain," I laughed as Alice continued on describing horrible situations.

"Lana," Fours form filled the metal door direction me towards him,

"Good luck," Kyle muttered as I passed them.

Once the heavy metal door slammed shut behind us I came into a room that was just like the room we all went to for in testing.

"Another simulation?" I asked in Four's direction. Not quite daring to take a seat.

"Same premises," he nodded me in the direction of the chair. "But this serum finds your fears, makes you face them."

"So we literally are facing our worst fears?" I jumped forward as my bare stomach hit the cold back of the chair, once again in my sports bra.

"Yes, set back,"

Four continued to explain the serum but my brain was running a million miles thinking about what I would face, what was I afraid of?

"Ready?" I hadn't even noticed the large needle he was holding.

"I guess,"

"Slow your heart rate down, be brave," Four spoke as he pushed the thick needle into the thin skin of my neck; but the pain didn't last long, I was sent into a different room.

"Okay Lan, let's see what your scared of," I spoke to myself; I was in an empty field, no other people, no animals, just the chair, and a wall off in the distance. The wall was the only thing that had to be where I needed to go.

I passed through the barren land, there was absolutely nothing here.

"I've got to be afraid of something," I continued to talk to myself, no one was here to hear me.

Once I got up to the wall I saw it was just a plain brick wall, I pressed my hand against it, feeling the heat radiating off it.

There was nothing for me here either.

Turning around I noticed another brick wall, about two feet in front of me.

"What am I scared of bricks?" I laughed to myself, turning to go around the other wall, but quickly out of the sky another wall fell, connecting the front wall to the back, turning I saw the forth wall fall, forming a box.

"No, no, no," turning in a complete circle, I was boxed in.

"Four I don't want to do this anymore!" I yelled out, figuring he was watching, as another wall fell across the top putting a roof on the box.

"Four!" I yelled pressing my back to the one of the walls, burning the skin on my back, it wasn't just a normal box; it was an oven.

Instantly the heat in the oven raised, it had to be 300 degrees in the brick prison. I made my way to the middle, hoping to get away from the heat of the walls.

Abruptly the grass along the bottom lit in flame, the skin on my legs felt like they were bubbling, spreading heat up them, a pain I had never felt in my life, skin cooking right off the bone.

'_Lower your heart rate'_

I didn't know if Four was talking to me, or my brain was reminding me of what to do, but I couldn't. I wouldn't let myself cook. I had decided that I was being burned everywhere, so I painfully made my way back over to the corner where the walls met, pressing my legs on each side, shimmying up the walls to get to the celling. Every part of my skin sizzled as it touched the walls, my rough knees, palms of my hand, all burning.

I slipped a little as the bottom of my shoes melted like hot tar in the summer.

Once I got to the top I lifted a hand hopping to push the top off, but nothing happened but a sizzle of my hand.

I let out a frustrated scream as I fell down onto the flames.

'_Lower your heart rate,' _Four was talking to me.

I decided I would listen, I was already half cooked, and blisters were covering my skin. I continued laying in the flame starring up at the celling, counting the bricks.

"Welcome back," Four's voice filled my ear canal, instantly the pain and smell was gone, never have existing in the first place. "You did well,"

"I was cooked," I spoke, out of breath from panic. Four didn't say anything as he typed on the keyboard in the corner, finally he turned to me.

"But you cooked fast," he let an uncharacteristic smile spread across his face. "Medium Rare at most,"

* * *

_AN: Reviews equal updates. Tell me what you really think, are you liking it?_

_-LANA_


	14. Chapter 14

"Let's never do that again," Alice spoke as we made our way into the dining hall.

"I agree, except we have to do it again tomorrow," I smiled in her direction as we sat at an empty table and began filling our plates, well Alice did.

"I was drowning," Alice admitted as we settled in to eat.

"I was cooking, literally, in a huge brick oven," She looked at Ali's chicken and all I could think of what the chicken cooking, for once I was happy my parents decided we were vegetarians.

"I was being spanked by a naughty nurse, but my hands were tied so I couldn't touch her," John's voice interrupted our conversation as he sat at our table, along with Eric.

"Don't you have some place to be?" I asked him pushing his chest. Which only earned me his arm around my shoulder.

"Yes right here with my best friend, and her friend Ali,"

I pulled forward to look at Eric on the other side of John.

"What was your fear Eric?" his eye grew, shocked by me bringing him into the conversation, but he didn't answer.

"His was me leaving him high and dry, with no friends," Eric tilted back his cup drinking the last of whatever was in it, "Without booze," John added.

Without missing a beat a blonde came over with a bottle of whatever Eric was drinking filling his cup, running her hand down the front of his chest.

"Sara," John muttered in our direction as we both watched Eric and the blonde interact. "Eric has been throwing it in her for months now," he added.

"Thanks for that visual," Ali finally contributed to the conversation.

"Who isn't he throwing it into?" I asked John loud enough for Eric to hear.

His head snapped over in my direction.

"Come on Sylvia, let's go," Eric stood pulling the blonde girl with him.

"I thought you said her name was Sara?" Ali asked when Eric was out of the ear shot.

"It is, he doesn't pay attention to detail." John laughed eating a chunk of cheese off my plate.

"He doesn't even know his girlfriend's name?" I snarled judging Eric once again.

"That's not his girlfriend," He looked at Ali and I like we had extra heads growing out of our necks. "He's just fucking her," and a smile spread across his face as his eyes lit up, "See you girls later," he said his goodbyes placing a sloppy kiss on my forehead and made his way over to Tori who had just walked into the dining hall door.

"Did you see his eyes light up when he saw her?" Ali asked with a smile on her face.

"Yeah, he really loves her," I smiled in their direction as they sat at a table together.

"I've been thinking," Ali paused, waiting for my reaction.

"About what?" I questioned trying to egg her on.

"Today you went first to the stimulation, then I went after you," she stopped.

"I'm not following!" I laughed trying to figure out what she was saying, as she leaned in closer.

"Four still had the rest of us to go after he did our sims, he wouldn't be in the control room," she whispered.

"You're a damn genius!" I took her arms in my hands, shaking her.

"So as long as we go in the same order, it will work!" she smiled happy to see my reaction, and excited about the thought of breaking some rules.

I stood out in the hall after my second stimulation, trying to collect myself, my skin still felt like it was crawling, even after I had checked to be sure there were no more cockroach legs on me.

The door to the hall opened as Ali flung herself against the wall beside me, tears running down her face breathing heavy.

I sat there waiting for her to collect herself knowing she would need time like I had needed, but we had to be gone before the person after Ali came out.

"Cockroaches," I spoke once she started breathing normally again, "Millions of them,"

"I was buried alive,"

"You win," I looked in her direction, trying to smile.

"Ready?" she asked standing up leading her way down the hall.

She began leading us down the normal hall of the pit, but quickly she took a turn down the hall that I would have never noticed.

"We have to climb," she informed me as we came to a dead end.

"Climb what?" I questioned, maybe she had forgotten the way.

"That," a smile lit her face, she was having way too much fun.

In the corner of the wall there was a sort of make shift ladder made into it, it went right up to the top floor of the rock levels.

"Four climbs this? This is why he's so built," I mentioned at I began going up the ladder steps, they barley had enough room for the tips of your toes.

"No, Four took the stairs" she laughed, climbing up beside me.

"WHAT?" I tried not to laugh along with her, "Then why are we taking a ladder?"

"I thought it looked fun, I saw Max use it the other day when we were up in the control room," I knew without looking she shrugged when she filled me in on the ladder situation.

"Wow," I just laughed.

After what seemed like hours of climbing we finally made it to the top, I peaked my head over the ledge looking both ways, no one was up here, she was right. No guards, no Four.

"See I told you I knew the way come-on," she grabbed my wrist once she was over the edge pulling me in the direction of a set of heavy looking doors.

"They don't even keep them locked?" I asked as we went right in. This was too easy, nothing in Dauntless was this easy.

"Guess not."

The room was exactly what I had pictured it to be, still a rock room like everything was here, dank, cold, filled with computer screens, keyboards, and two computer chairs. But more importantly it wasn't what the room looked like it was what it contained, 4 of the 8 screens on the walls were spilt into four different security cameras in Dauntless, and the other 4 were just black screens with a mic in front.

"What are these screens?" I asked Alice as she began digging around.

"I asked the same thing, Four said each one is for a different faction, so they can communicate if needed."

Empty coffee cups and dirty plates were everywhere, I wouldn't be surprised if they had mice and cockroaches in here eating the leftover food.

"Four needs a maid,"

"Oh I didn't tell you, the kitchens clean up in here," a huge smile was on her face, "Britney had to come in here yesterday and clean, but threw a big fit, and Max came and dragged her out, that's how I knew about the ladder."

Both of our laughter filled the room.

"Here we are, Alana Eversong," she handed me a manila envelope and she held one in her hand, sitting in a computer chair.

"Who are you reading about Ali?" I smirked clearly knowing it wasn't her folder, she had once told me her whole family had been in Candor since factions began.

"Kyle, I think I might let him ask me out," she smirked opening the folder.

"Might let him?" I laughed taking the other chair,

"Yeah, he's tried a couple times, but before I let him get the question out I walk away,"

I began looking my folder over, nothing was really interesting till I got to the family tree page.

**Alana Eversong (Dauntless Transfer via Amity)**

**Robert Eversong (Father, Amity Transfer Via Erudite)**

**Rebecca Eversong (Mother, Amity Transfer Via Dauntless)**

**Paul Eversong (Paternal Grandfather, Erudite)**

**Cecily Eversong (Paternal Grandmother, Erudite. Deceased)**

**Brian Lodgner (Maternal Grandfather, Dauntless via Abnegation)**

**Catherine Lodgner (Maternal Grandmother, Factionless)**

_Factionless? My grandmother was Factionless, how did she find me? Was I with her? How would I ever find her to ask?_

"What are you two doing in here!?" A familiar voice drew my eyes off of the paper, Eric.

His large frame stood in the doorway of the control room, his face red and his body tense.

"Light reading?" I answered trying to lighten the mood.

"Breaking and entering you mean?" he moved closer to the two of us.

"In our defense, nothing was locked so its' not really a breaking and entering case, more like trespassing?" I shrugged my shoulders trying to make him smile.

"Lan…" Ali grumbled from beside me, her way of telling me to shut up.

"What are you lightly reading?" Eric asked ripping the envelope out of my hand. He looked it over and quickly looked up into my green eyes, he must have thought I was a real freak, reading a folder about myself. "And what about you Alice lightly reading on yourself too?" he questioned her, fear spread across her face. Why was she scared of Eric?

"Um no sir, on Kyle," she answered honestly, "He's about to pass me in ranking and I wanted to fear him something he can't have," dishonest.

That comment almost made Eric laugh, almost.

"Do you girls know why the Control room is way up here?" he asked clearly not using his indoor voice.

"No," we both muttered, we were in so much trouble.

"We put it up here so no one comes into it," made sense.

"Ali, give me your folder and go back to the dorm, I'll send Four to deal with you,"

"Yes sir," she muttered turning around in the doorway to look at me with an apologetic look in her eyes before she went down the hall.

"Eric, it was my idea to come in here, I just dragged her along,"

"Save it," he began putting our folders away, "She worked in here yesterday, that is how you knew how to get here," at least he had lowered his voice.

"Lana, if it hadn't of been me in here to catch you two, you'd be factionless by now." He shifted through the cabinet putting them back in alphabetical order.

"How did you know we were in here?" I was questioned still in the chair.

"My office is up here," he said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"What are you two doing?" Four's voice rang out in the room, and I had to stop myself from running into his arms, glad not to be left alone with Eric any longer.

"He's trespassing, I came to stop him but he wouldn't listen to reason," I joked as a smirk passed my face.

"Actually it was the other way around, you need to deal with Alice, she's in their room, they were reading folders,"

"What folders?" Four asked scanning the room, fear on his face. It had never crossed my mind that there might be more important folders in this room then just keeping track of members.

"Transfer folders," Eric nodded his head towards the door basically telling Four to take a hike.

"Come on," Eric grabbed me out of the chair and led me down the original hallway to a dark red door, another door that wasn't locked.

"You all really don't believe in security here do you?" I questioned as he pushed the door open.

"We are the security,"

The office he lead me into instantly brought a warmth to my body, it was another rock room like usual, but it was cozy, the walls were lined with bookcases, most of them empty, but there was a small collection of books on the bottom shelf in the far corner, like he was hiding them. The carpet in the room was a dark green, almost a mossy color that matched two cushion chairs that sat in front of a large mahogany desk with a black leather computer chair.

"Tell me Lana, why are you always at the wrong places, at the wrong times, asking the wrong questions?" Eric asked as he sat down in the leather chair behind the desk motioning for me to sit in the green chair.

"I'm not, you just caught me today,"

Eric smirked at me, "I've caught you a lot of times, breaking and entering, oh I'm sorry _Trespassing, _not paying attention to directions, puking into the chasm, locked in a closet."

I had almost forgotten that he was there all those times; that he had beaten my father to a pulp for me, getting me out of the utility closet.

"Thanks for that, by the way." I tucked my legs up underneath my butt, "I don't think I said thank you,"

"You just did," his smirk remained, while he sat there staring at me I didn't miss the opportunity to stare at him. His blonde hair was doing in usual pompadour thing, his slightly tanned skin looked like it was going to rip at any time over the muscles he had developed underneath them, he was still lean even with all his mass, but drew my attention most was the scars and scabs on his knuckles and hands. Were those from my father?

"Why do you follow me?" I asked having to end the staring contest between us. His dark grey eyes rose as I pulled him out of his world.

"I guess I'm usually at the wrong place, at the wrong time, asking the wrong questions too," he stood from his chair getting closer to me.

"You never answer a question I ask, you always answer it with what I already said," he sat on the armrest of my chair staring down at me, my blood started to run and my heart beat, he was close, really close. "Well then I don't see how you can punish me for something you can't seem to stop doing yourself…"

"Oh for the love of god shut up,"

He pulled me up into his lap, pressing his lips to mine.

AN: I'll be gone for a few days, let me know what ya'll think.

-LANA


	15. Chapter 15

The feeling of his chapped lips should have been disturbing, all the other boys I had kissed had been soft, smooth. The feeling of his icy lips rings against my lower lip was also unfamiliar, his calloused hand on my hip holding me in place, the other covered in scars and scabs brought goose bumps over my body as he rubbed up and down my side. All of these factors worked together to remind me of something, I wasn't kissing some wild boy hidden in the fields of Amity, fumbling not knowing what he was doing as he muttered reaching for my zipper before our parents started looking for us. This was a guy, a tough, pierced, experienced guy that never turned down a fight, no matter who the challenge was from. Everything he did from the way he kissed to the way he ran his hand made him in control, just like the way he was in his world, leader, and my body was letting him be in charge like everyone else.

But my mind was a different story.

With all my might I pulled away from him, hopping off his lap with both feet on the floor, as he eyes squinted at me not quite understanding what I was doing, a darker shade of gray then I ever had seen before.

"You can't just tell me to shut up and kiss me, I'm not your little kitchen girl, I'm not going to come fill your drink and rub your chest, you're always trying to fight with me, it's not attractive," I informed him not sure where to put my hands or stand, my body was fighting back, wanting to feel him against me again.

"Sounds like to me your jealous, you brought boots, that's the same as booze." He stayed in the position he was, an angry look on his face. "And I'm not always trying to fight you,"

A psst passed my lips as he spoke, "You're always fighting with me, telling me I'm not doing something right, calling me an Amity, you make me want to beat your face in, you make my skin crawl,"

A smirk covered his face, "Well punch me, it would be hot, and I only make your skin do that because it's trying to get off your body and crawl to me,"

"Oh aren't you so confidant, I've got news for you buddy," I made my way closer to him my index finger pointed out, "I've heard it all," poke to the chest. "I've seen it all," another poke to his chest. "And I'm not impressed, I eat boys like you for breakfast,"

"WHOA! I guess she told your ass!" John's voiced echoed through the rock room, turning I saw him standing in the doorway, laughing. I didn't know what was so funny about this scene.

"And you!" I pointed my finger in John's direction as he did a dramatic shocked face and pressed he back of his hand to his forehead, "Need to wear a damn bell," I couldn't stay mad at that face.

"I used to wear one, but it became really hard to sneak around," Eric silently stared bullets in John's direction.

"Now is there anything further, or am I free to leave?" I asked Eric in a sarcastic tone, knowing he loved to be in charge.

"Wait, you were in trouble, and he got a kiss like that?" John smirked once again "Well you're in tons of trouble Lana, I need to have a stern talking to you, meet me in my bedroom later!"

"Well we can discuss it while you walk me to the pit, come on," I pulled the sleeve of his jacket dragging him out into the hall.

"Yes Ma'am," he gave one look back at Eric. We didn't say anything until we got to the top of the stairs, and began descending.

"So what was that all about?" John questioned, losing all his silly voices and being serious, no one was on the stairs for layers you could hear a light roar from the main level downstairs.

"I broke into the control room, I needed…"

"I'm not talking about why you were in trouble, I'm talking about your apparent punishment," I began to say something but he continued talking. "I've known Eric my whole life, I know he's an asshole, a power hungry maniac, and a man whore, but I can also tell you he's the best friends I've ever had, he's a loving guy on the inside, and the moment he saw you at the table your first night he couldn't stop looking at you,"

"He's got a funny way of showing his positive attributes," I interrupted into John's speech.

"What can I say, I only get to see them because I'm totally gay for him," John tried to lighten our talk, "But all that besides, he doesn't know how to love, no better than it seems like you do, he's had a hard life and he's fucked up from it,"

I scuffed, "Yeah, really fucked up," I replied as we reached on of the landings.

"Well missy, no more fucked up then what I saw last week, you're parents tried to lock you in a broom closet," he took the chance to take my hand looking over all the scars from my fight with Alex, bring back the memory of the doctors snapping my fingers back into place, "Lan, everyone has their demons, some face them and it's over," he reached up and pushed a piece of my hair behind my ear in a loving way only John could manage, "Some drink to keep them at bay, or blank out in a fight and beat a boy to a pulp," he kissed my forehead as large tear began rolling down my cheeks, "But I can say with my whole heart, or what little one I have, that Eric isn't what he seems,"

"Well I'm still not going to let him kiss me, he's not my type." I spoke as we began down the stairs again.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night killer,"

* * *

After my walk with John I went to the dining hall to find Ali, wondering what kind of punishment Four had given her, since I seem to have got off scotch free. Her back was towards the door, but she was in our usual spot, but something was new about her, either she had grown an extra arm, or someone else's was around her shoulders. A light ginger mop of head was sitting beside her, Kyle.

"So, what's the verdict, are we cleaning or something?" I asked sitting down across from the duo.

"I've got to clean the dining hall after dinner for a week," she muttered glancing angrily in Four's direction, "What about you?"

"I've got to help you," I wasn't going to tell him I got a kiss as punishment.

"Good, at least it will go by faster,"

We ate in silence until dinner was over and the place had cleared out, "So at least tell me you found out what you needed in there," Alice asked.

"Yeah, I need to find my grandfather, my grandmother , it said she was factionless, but she must have been here at one time; My mom grew up here."

"Do you think he'll tell you anything?" she questioned as we made our way to the kitchens to get our cleaning assignments.

"His original faction was abnegation," I shrugged, "Maybe something imbedded into him,"

Once we got into the kitchen a happy shriek filled the room;

"You must be the girl Four sent to clean," Eric's blonde girl met us in the doorway, "It was just supposed to be one, which one of you is..Alice," she had to think of the name Four had told her.

"Me," Alice said looking in my direction;

"Eric told me I had to help Alice, he must of forgotten to tell you," I shrugged in her direction, avoiding her eyes, I wasn't a good liar.

"Oh, Eryy sent you?" she screeched an annoying smile spread across her face, "Did he say anything about me?"

'_Erry?'_

"Are you Sylvia?" I questioned the blonde, remembering what her real name was. "He said he knew you,"

"It's Sara, he knows, he's just playing,"

"Whatever," I spoke to her, ready to get this work over.

She had us mop the floors, clean the tables and bring the dishes into the kitchen for an oily teenager to wash, "He's in more trouble than yous," she informed us, she must of thought 'yous' was a word.

"Take out the trash and Four said don't leave, he's be into talk to you Alice," she directed her head in a pile of trash bags in the corner of the kitchen, clearly it had been days since someone took it out.

"This smells worse than when the sewer pipes busted in the court room," Alice spoke taking two bags in one hand to hold her nose with the other, "This meat was rotten last year," she faked gag throwing her bag into the large industrial trashcan.

"You're the one the eats the meat," I growly spoke not breathing through my nose, tossing in the rest of the trash bags.

"Not anymore we are going to have to split that apple at dinner," she laughed as we went back into the dining hall to wait on Four.

"So, how are you going to hunt down your grandfather?" she asked turning her body so her legs were under the table, I was sitting on the table with my feet on the seat beside her.

"Well, I'm not sure, and I'm also not sure what he's going to tell me," I informed her, running my hands through my hair, then thought better of it after lugging trash.

"What if he tells you to go to the factionless to ask her," a fear spread across her face. I hadn't thought of that.

"Then I guess, I'll go,"

"Where are you going?" Eric came into the empty dining hall holding a bottle of whatever he was drinking tonight sloshing the liquid at the very bottom.

"To take a shower after I leave here," I held my hands up like I was contaminated, "I smell like last year's trash,"

The rise in his nose as he got closer to us confirmed my sentence, which instantly brought anger to my body, "Why do you care?" I snapped in his direction offended.

"Why are you here anyways?" he asked ignoring my question.

"Doing my punishment," I spoke, hoping he'd play along.

"What punishment?" he tilted his bottle back drinking the last of it, "I don't have time to talk, I need to get something more to drink," he buzzed straight into the kitchens where a screech of 'ERRY,' filled the room, Sara must have seen him.

"You mean you didn't have to clean with me?" Alice asked as an angered look spread across her face and I instantly felt heat cross my face.

"No, Eric just reamed me a new ass and told me to leave," I couldn't tell her about the kiss, about what John had told me. "But I couldn't let you get a punishment alone when you were just helping me,"

Her anger slowly faded away as she thought about what I was saying, "Well thank you for helping me, but don't lie to me again, I might be Dauntless now, but I still hate being lied to,"

I instantly felt the weight I didn't know I had been holding on my shoulders lift, "Deal!" I smiled at her right before Four came in.

"Ah Lana, I was wondering if you'd show," Four spoke coming up to us, also raising his nose at the smell.

"Jeez, I know we need a shower," Ali spoke to him in a joking voice, they had apparently become close over their control room day.

"Yeah you do, get out of here,"

He motioned towards the door to both of us.

"In our defense I don't think you smell bad," I told Ali stepping into the hall.

"Awe thanks Lan, I don't think you smell bad either,"

Even with each other's confirmation of our smells we both made our way to the showers after stopping off to get clothes to change into.

* * *

Standing under the water I let everything from the day flow out of me, water from the facet wasn't the only thing on my face, tears were leaking down across them too, scrubbing my body with soap didn't seem to make me feel clean, but something in the back of my head was telling me it wasn't my outside that was dirty it was the way I felt on the inside.

"She's in here," a muffled voice echoed in my stall as the light breeze of the shower curtain moving hit my nude body.

Turning around, still under the head of the shower, a girl I didn't know stood in the doorway, along with Sara.

"So, you think you can kiss Eric and get away with it bitch?" she questioned me moving into the stall with me along with the other girl, he eyes were glossed over with pure hatred.

"What are you talking about?" I asked her reaching behind me to turn the water off.

"Oh don't play stupid, your little friend informed me," she looked me up and down, making me feel self-conscious, having my naked body scanned.

"I still don't know what your…"

"Save it bitch, Eric is mine, and my friend and I have come to remind you of that," her 'friend' wasn't a normal Dauntless, she was chunky, like a bull.

"You need your friend as backup, you can't fight me yourself **SYLVIA**," my mouth spoke while my inner self screamed to shut up, my eyes looking her big friend up and down.

"It's SARA!" she wailed lunging at me, but once she got up close she thought better of it moving out of the way so her partner could get in.

"You're going to leave Eric alone, do you understand," the bull spoke to me, moving closer. My body was a stubborn ass, because my legs refused to run, I never backed down from a fight, well the two fights I'd had.

"Does she make you come fight all her battles?" I questioned the girl as we started circling each other, to which I got no reply. "What does she do for you in return? Pluck your chest hairs?" the brahma bull made a disgusted face. "Oh you didn't like that did you, maybe your little friend ratted you out," I spoke remembering what Sara had said before.

"Yeah some friends you've got, do you know how fast Britney came running to me, after you two left ,she was cleaning the top floor and saw you molesting Eric in his office."

"Well she's not the only one with friends," Ali's voice filled my cubical, I had completely forgot she was there.

"This is none of your business bitch, stay out of it," The bull said in Alice's direction.

"It is my business whore," and with that Alice jumped naked onto Sara and began punching her face in, leaving me nothing to do but distract the bull from helping her friend.

The sound of wet punches bounced off ever surface of the room, and before I knew it the chants of 'fight, fight, fight,' filled the girls shower, I had a slim opportunity to look over at Ali while we circled each other again, she had Sara down on the floor, beating her to a pulp, she had slowed down once she was sure Sara wouldn't get back up.

I knew I needed to catch up.

I charged at the large girl knocking her down to the floor, instantly she began gasping for breath as her large frame rested against her lungs, she was her own worst enemy.

Punch after punch I went after her, kicking and twisting my fist in her ribs, the water on running down the drain had turned red.

"GIRLS KNOCK IT OFF!" Four's voice screamed, he stood in the doorways holding two towels, I had forgotten I was stark naked, but he wasn't alone, Eric and John stood there as well.

Neither girl got up as Ali and I grabbed the towels from Four covering ourselves.

"EVERYONE OUT!" Eric yelled to the crowd that had filled the shower room. Mutters were heard from everyone hoping to hear our punishment.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Four questioned when everyone filed out.

"I dropped the soap," I tried to crack a joke as we both sat on the wet ground to catch a breath.

"Save it Lana," Eric spoke, the alcohol he had been consuming earlier hadn't effected how his body acted.

"Since I'm sure you two didn't start a fight, naked in the shower, I'll assume they attacked you, don't let it happen again." Crimson spread across Four's face as he mentioned the fact that we were in fact naked when everyone waked in, naked fighting.

"Damn girl, now you host fights in the shower, next time wait till I get here, I'll get naked and we can fight about the first thing that pops up" John smile instantly made me feel a thousand times better.

"Sure, I'll let you know," I smirked getting off the floor holding my towel tight, stalking past the duo in the doorway and the two unconscious girls on the floor, before grabbing my change of clothes and walking out of the shower, the patter of Ali's bare feet followed.

"You know I wouldn't just fight anybody while naked for anyone else but you right," She smiled walking towards the dorm for the night with me.

* * *

AN: I don't own anything from the Divergent world.

There ya'll go, you crazy scoundrels, an update, see it didn't' take that long.

On a deeper note, there was a lot of cussing in this chapter, it that okay? I mean obviously it's okay but are ya'll okay with it? Or leave it out? Let me know how ya'll feel.

Also this story had contained a lot of drama, but I think every good story is drama filled, no good story goes, 'She woke up, had a lovely day, and went to bed happy,'

Now I'm just rambling.

Reviews equal faster updates, let me know how ya'll are feeling about the story!

-Lana


	16. Chapter 16

The next morning at breakfast the hall filled with female mutters as Alice and I strolled in, we must have got overnight fame from our shower fight, unwanted attention.

"I can't believe we actually get to eat breakfast this morning, no wakeup call from Four," Ali smiled while talking to me in Kyle's direction, clearly ignoring the drones.

She was right, we had never had the chance to eat breakfast before, and I couldn't help but let my stomach take control as I saw that the table was actually filled with an assortment of fruit other than an apple.

"Well, is it true?" Kyle asked us while we took our seats, filling our plates.

"Is what true?" Ali asked, my stomach instantly dropped, people knew about the fight, but did they know the cause of the fight? Who had Britney told about Eric and I? Who had Sara told?

"Did you two get into a knock out drag down naked in the shower?"

Ali simply nodded her head bring a spoonful of eggs to her mouth.

"Why?" he questioned with his mouth gapping open, my heart began beating a mile a minute, Ali hadn't asked me if what Sara and her friend had said was true.

"Some shit Britney is spreading," she turned her head in my direction, "We can't forget about her," she reminded me, scanning the dining hall clearly looking for her. "She must have been smart enough to stay away," she confirmed after scanning the whole room.

"What does Brit have against you two?" Kyle asked, clearly our little feud was common knowledge.

"She's mad that I beat her in a fight, and that Lan is the better Amity transfer, also probably that fact that she looks like she got beat with an ugly stick as a child."

I made a mental note to myself to never get on Ali's bad side.

"Well, the last is true," Kyle laughed wrapping his arm around her shoulder once more. The breakfast table fell into a comfortable silence as we picked our plates, I allowed my eyes to scan the new couple. Both were strong, and handsome looking, but more than physical I saw their honestly, good nature, and loyalty. I finally allowed my brain to accept the fact they were my friends.

I had real friends.

Two people I would go to war with or for, Ali had clearly already proved herself to me multiple times, and as cryptic as it was I could only hope I would get the chance to do the same for her.

"LANNY!" another country unheard from, sat beside me, the weight of his muscles shifted our bench.

"John," I mumbled in a monotone, the silence of our table quickly escaping from my grasp.

"Awe, what a downer you are," he once again began picking off my plate in his usual nature.

"You know they let everyone fix their own plate here?" I questioned him watching him pop a piece of melon in his mouth.

"Wanna get naked and fight about it?" he smirked taking another piece.

"Not here please," Four sat down on the other side of me, and the table made a sort of grown from the bulk of the two boys.

"It was a onetime deal, I promise I won't fight naked again,"

A mumbled of damn and thank you exited the pairs mouth at the same time.

"Awe Lan, I was hoping we would make it a usual occurrence," Alice added herself to the conversation, "Besides we still have to deal with Brit," she smiled thinking of our future fight.

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Four spoke fixing himself a plate.

* * *

"Okay initiates, today we are going to do something a little different," Eric spoke to our group, today the Dauntless born also stood with us. He looked normal, but I couldn't help but notice his eyes squinted in the light of the room, how could someone clearly drink a bottle of booze a night?

'_He's had a rough life, everyone deals with their demons differently,' _John's voice filled my mind.

"We are giving you a little break from fear landscapes, and taking you on a field trip,"

A roar of excitement filled the room, some muttering they hoped it was another war game.

"To the fence," Eric added over the thunder and a room of 'BOOS' could be heard.

"Shut up and get on the train," Eric pointed out the back door of the training room which led to the tracks.

Once all of us were on the train the Dauntless born took a seat, so I figured it must be quite a way to the fence. Sitting against the back wall I felt the cool metal on my shoulder blades, bringing me back to the train ride with Eric from Erudite; our conversation running laps in my mind. When he echoed my statement of not fitting it, I had read his eyes to be anger, but from what John mentioned, I might have jumped the gun, could it have been pain in his steely eyes? My own green eyes scanned the train hoping to catch a glance of Eric.

He was sitting against a wall like the rest of us, his eyes shut with his long legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. No matter how much I fought my mind, my body gave a lurch I couldn't ignore, our kiss had been incredible. He absent mindedly bit the dead skin off his lips, his eyes remaining shut even when the guy beside him started making conversation.

"It's not as bad as it sounds," Four's voice pulled me out of my inspection. "The fence I mean," a small smile spread across his face as I turned to look at him. "Our transfer year there was an Amity boy, and he really seemed to enjoy the fence,"

"Did he?" I didn't know what else to say to him.

"Yeah, I think he works out there,"

"Oh," Why was Four being so nice all of a sudden, yesterday he told me I stunk and sent me to the showers, not twenty minutes later her got an eyeful of me fully naked.

"Yeah," he spoke watching me, before standing up and taking off his jacket, copying the move of Eric days earlier, resting his coat against my bare shoulders. Their jacket may have looked the same, but it had two different reactions to my skin, Eric's instantly brought heat to my body, relaxing me as I breathed in his scent. Four's made me tense and for a moment I hoped no one was looking at the two of us, he smelled just like everyone else did to me, and I knew more than likely there wouldn't be any cigarettes in his pockets.

I smiled in his direction, a silent thanks for the jacket, even though I wanted nothing more than to give it back to him. Turning my head I noticed three sets of eyes glaring in my direction, dark brown ones that belong to Britney, she would sure love spreading around that not only did I kiss Eric but the next day I was seen wearing Four's jacket. A kind set of Ali's as she rested her head against Kyles shoulder while he chatted with Alex beside him, and finally a steal gray pair, and for once I knew I was making a correct assumption of the anger in his eyes.

* * *

"What's out there?" Kyle asked in Four's direction from the top of the fence.

"Amity farms," I told him, my eyes refused to look away from the fields.

"Beyond that?" Kyle continued.

"Let's just say we guard the fence for a reason," Kyle seemed to take that as a viable answer.

From the top of the fence the Amity trucks looked like small cars, rather than the tanks like machines it portrayed when you were up close to them, the workers plowing and hoeing the crops were the size of ants, but out on the furthest layer of the crop field stood the hot box I had spent half my life in, instantly I felt sick to my stomach.

Who did they have in there today? Had anyone been in there since I left?

'_How long did they leave you in there after I left?' _Paul had asked me. Had they really left me in the box for longer than a day? The longest period of time I could remember was when I was real small, I only knew that because I was too short to see out of the small termite hole that was in the wood up against the top, from that hole I knew I had been in the box from sunrise to sunset.

Had I slept in that box? I couldn't remember.

"Are you planning on making a run for it?" his rough voice set my blood on fire.

"To what?" I questioned not having it in me for a fight today.

I looked over at Eric to see that we were the only ones on the top layer of the fence.

"Home," he nodded his head in the direction of the farms.

"That was never home, I told you, I don't belong there," I kept my eyes in his direction, refusing to look back out there.

"Nice Jacket," Eric sneered looking me over, I was still wearing Four's leather coat. I didn't know why I was either, it was warm once you were off the train, but for some reason I didn't hand if back to him once we were off the train.

"It's not mine," I knew what he meant but I didn't want to play his game.

"I know. I prefer you naked anyway, but clearly he did too," was he saying Four enjoyed the show last night, surely not, Four would never think like that, he blushed at the word naked.

"I thought you said I was the jealous one?" I whispered in his ear before pushing past him to the staircase hoping to catch up with the rest of the group.

* * *

AN: Short, might update tomorrow, let me know what you think.

Reviews get quicker updates!


	17. Chapter 17

"Today will be your last new fear simulation, then you start doing the same ones over for practice," Four's voice bounced off every metal surface in the hall."Lana, you're up first," he turned into the room like usual, knowing I would follow.

"Where is your jacket Lana?" Britney sneered in my direction, giggling to herself.

"I'll tell you where it is going to be," I took a step in her direction as she took in a deep breath.

"LAN," Four yelled from inside the room, preparing to break up a fight.

Once I was inside the room I had become all to familiar with, something else all to familiar interrupted us, "Four, Max wants you in his office, I've got this today," Eric stood in the back door to the room;Four looked at me with his apologetic eyes. Before handing Eric the thick needle and walked out of the door.

"Sit down, you know the drill," he tilted his head towards the chair turning to the computer.

"Hi Lana, how are you today, the weather's nice isn't it? Are you ready to face your worst fear yet?" I sarcastically spoke to myself, settling myself in the chair, why had I let this asshole kiss me?

"Hi Lana, the weather is shitty, your going to face your worst fear yet today, sit the fuck down and shut up,"

My feet instantly shot to the ground dragging my body with it, "Listen, I'm sick of this, you don't talk to me unless you have to and I won't talk to you," I pointed my finger in his direction, his face didn't show any emotion that could be read other than boredom.

"You can't avoid me Lana, I'm in charge here, look at the big picture, keep pissing me off and your out," no emotion still, "I don't care if you are first jumper, or in the first slot. You'll be out so fast people won't even remember you were here, you think Alice would fight for you, she'd be in first place then, top dog." he took a deep breath, "You need to get your shit together and remember who I am,"

"I know who you are, your a drunk, some messed up nerd who got an inch of power and took a mile, you've become really confident in your position but one word from Four and your just chopped liver baby," During my speech Eric had made his way over to where I stood, he reached back in an attempt to slap me in the face before I grabbed his wrist.

"You don't know shit Alana, you think you know, but you don't," and for the second time that week I was pulled into Eric as he pressed his dry lips to mine.

For a second I didn't know if I was in a simulation or a nightmare, until my body turned on my mind, I was my own worst enemy.

We stood aggressively kissing in the middle of the simulation room for what seemed like hours, both of us fighting for dominance, neither one being successful from the others stubbornness.

"We need to stop," I pushed against his chest, my mind finally winning out. After I pulled away Eric licked his lips looking at me, I wasn't sure what his face read, but it defiantly wasn't an apology for attempting to slap me.

"Lets get this over with so I can get away from you," I slammed myself against to chair, today not caring how cold it was against my back.

He still didn't say anything pushing my hair out of the way and taking more pleasure then he should jabbing me with a needle in the neck.

"You know the drill," he dully spoke.

Instantly I was sent to another place, just me and my metal chair. I slowly stood up not knowing what to expect, but I knew straightaway where I was, Amity. Trees were all around me, faceless figures in red and yellow were cutting crops,no one looked at me, just straight through me. Everybody had a place, a job, but I just stood in the middle wondering what would happen now.

"Alana, you've come back," the hair on the back of my neck stood at end, my father was speaking to me.

"No I haven't," He moved closer to me, moving like a creature more than a human, a creature stalking his pray. "I would never come back, I don't belong here,"

"Oh, yes you do Alana, you're our star student," an evil smirk spread on his face, "Or have you forgotten your training as well,"

I knew this wasn't real, in my mind but I couldn't snap out of it, everything felt real, smelt real.

"I guess I'll just have to remind you," he sneered charging at me, my body wouldn't let me react, my feet felt like they were stuck to the ground with glue.

An attack from anyone took you by surprise, even if you were ready your brain takes a moment to process it. My father pulled back with all his might punching me straight into the face, kicking me in the knees, until I fell to the ground, but my body still wouldn't allow me to get up.

"All these years of allowing you to be free, and you still abuse the power, the monsters inside you are strong Alana, but daddy is going to take care of them, this is for your own good," he picked up the one of the knives we cut crops with that suddenly appeared beside my head and began carving into my body, down my arms, up my legs, red hot pain seared on my body, I screamed for help, but none of the faceless bodies looked, no one heard me.

"You never even smile Alana, you used to have such a pretty smile," he pressed the knife up against the side of my mouth applying pressure as I felt blood running into my mouth, the metal taste pouring down my throat as he did the other side.

Tears were rivers down my face, but I could no longer scream for help, my face was in throbbing pain.

"I love you baby girl, so much. I have to do this, you know it," he pulled back before kissing my cheek, when he pulled back his face was covered in my blood.

"Welcome home sweetheart,"

I didn't belong here, this wasn't me, I was no longer Amity.

"NO!" I yelled, my body seemed to come to life, moving slower than I usually did I grabbed the knife out of his hands while pushing him to the ground, and I did the only thing I could do.

The knife cut into his chest like a hot knife in butter, when I pulled the knife back instead of blood a thick black tar like substance ran out of his chest and a scream escaped my lungs.

"Lan, Lan, your back, your okay," Four was standing over me, but I could barley hear him over a scream, my scream.

Four eyes stared down at me two dark blue, two deep gray, neither knew what to do. A heavy hand rested on my shoulder while I continued to scream, they said nothing allowing my to continue. After what seemed like hours my screams turned into silent tears and deep gasps for breaths.

"It wasn't real Lana," Eric tried to do the first nice thing he could, but the awkwardness of his attempt over weighed his words.

"It had to come from somewhere didn't it?" I questioned out loud more to myself than them, had my father beaten me and I didn't remember?

"Who knows what your mind makes up in a simulation Lana, it could be something else that just presented itself that way," Four tried comforting me as well.

"Can I go now?" I stood up from the table wiping my tears from my face before turning to the back door not waiting for an answer.

Once I was out in the hall I did the only thing I could think of, I walked straight to the bathroom and pulled down my pants, inspecting my legs in the mirror, would there be scars? Inspecting my tan legs from years in amity, I saw them, places that I had always shrugged off as stretch marks on my legs, but they weren't they were raised not sunken in, they were so faint you wouldn't even notice them if you weren't looking for them, but as my eye saw them it was like seeing light for the first time, scars so old I had forgotten about them, I must have acquired them as a kid, a very little kid.

* * *

The rain poured down on my body as I lied on the roof top of dauntless, where my journey had began, where I made my first jump. I didn't know how long I had been up here, but I knew I had no desire to move any time soon. This was the only place I had found to be alone, to think, try and remember anything I could. But it was like my mind was full of holes. I remembered fun things, playing in a creek, dancing in the moon light, playing tag with the other kids, I didn't remember anything negative at all, never yelled at, never doing dishes or being forced to work. Everything positive except for the hot box, the one that stood right in the middle of Amity. The sound of a metal door slamming pulled me out of my head, but didn't startle me enough to open my eyes, it was probably just Ali seeing if I was okay. Something warm fell over my body as the scent of mint and cigarettes filled my nose.

"You're going to freeze to death up here," I heard the rocks shift as he sat beside me, and a flick of a lighter.

"Well that would save you the trouble of kicking me out wouldn't it?" I didn't know why I always had to start a fight with him, it was like we were two magnets fighting each other, trying with all our might to stay apart.

"I talk a lot of shit but listen to me, I wouldn't do that," he cleared his throat.

"No one ever fights with me, or ignores my orders, I don't know how to deal with it," I opened one eye looking over at the man beside me.

"Are you trying to apologize?" I questioned not being able to keep the smirk off my face.

"I will never apologize for who I am, I don't know anything else. I'm a dick, either deal with it or get out of the way," he paused for a moment, thinking his words over carefully, "But I will say sorry for my actions, I should of never tried to hit you, especially after..."

"You didn't know Eric, I didn't know," I sat up pulling his jacket on my arms, I hadn't noticed how cold I actually was, for the first time I looked over at Eric, his hair was shifted from the rain. "I still don't know," his eyes squinted trying to look at me through the droplets.

"Well what do you know than?" he took another puff of his cigarette.

"That I need to find out," I pulled up a hand of rocks before dropping them again, not knowing exactly what to do in a normal conversation with Eric.

"Well you don't remember?" his forehead squished up, the first time he had ever looked slightly ugly.

"I don't remember much of anything," instantly I knew I had said to much, I knew I couldn't trust Eric.

"My tattoos are building blocks," he saw my hesitation.

"What?" I questioned not sure where his statement came from.

"My tattoos, you asked what my tattoos were when we first met, they are like atoms, the building blocks of a person, these are mine," he shifted the collar of his t-shirt away so I could see, the blocks traveled down his chest. To the normal eyes they were just solid blocks, but they way he said it, they were beautiful.

"Thanks," I smiled at him.

"For what?" he once again did his ugly squint at me.

"For letting someone in,"

"This doesn't mean I'm going to change," he stood making his way towards the end of the building, readying himself to jump, "Don't mistake this for my weakness," were his last words before he jumped down onto the net below.

* * *

AN: Another update? I'm on a damn roll. Ya'll that have been commenting are so sweat. I'm blowing kisses to you! Let me know what you think, probably will update tomorrow, if my creative juiced are flowing, or at least dripping

-LANA


	18. Chapter 18

"Sara is back, and her oxen of a friend," Ali informed me at breakfast the next day, once again we hadn't gotten a rude wake-up call. She nodded her head in the direction that most of the Dauntless not in initiation sat, the duo were staring bullets at us, I took the opportunity to smirk at them, noticing the bruises over their body.

Turning back to the table two things were became noticeable, there was no fruit of any kind, no eggs and no vegetables. The only food on the table were meats, bacon, sausage.

"Well, I'm glad you woke up for breakfast," Ali said handing me a bottle of water.

When I looked back up I instantly wished I hadn't, Eric came into the dining hall,and straight lined for Sara, taking a seat behind her while she smirked in my direction.

"Awe he must need to lick her wounds," Ali had noticed him over there too, "I can't believe we haven't caught hell for this yet," she took the words right out of her mouth, or did this how Dauntless worked? You had a problem with somebody you confronted them and duked it out.

"I have a feeling this isn't over," I added to her statement.

* * *

"4 minutes," Four told me while I inspected my body for burns after redoing my oven fear, "You're doing well," he sat on the edge of the chair while I looked my legs over.

"Does it ever stop feeling real?" I questioned looking up into his blue eyes.

"I'll let you know if mine ever stops," he shrugged.

"I know it's not real, but that doesn't matter to my body, I freeze up and freak out, like yesterday,"

"You were in there for 6 minutes, that 5 minutes faster than everyone else," he tried to comfort me, a small smile on his face.

"Where do your fears come from? How am I afraid of something I didn't even know I was afraid of?"

"I don't know that either,"

"What are you afraid of Four?" I questioned Four knowing it was a touchy subject in Dauntless.

"My dad too," he muttered embarrassed. "I've never told anybody before, but when I saw you yesterday, I felt like I had to," he looked down at my boots.

"I don't know if it's true, Four, I don't remember,"

"It's true, your body never forgets,"

"I'll never tell anybody your secret," I pulled his face up to look at mine and smiled at him.

"Good, because I'm still in charge," he smirked.

"Okay _Eric,_" I laughed jumping off the chair and walked out of the back door.

"My love, you've come for me," John yelled across the pit when I stepped inside from his spot beside Tori on the rocks. I smiled at him attempting to continue on my journey to the dorm. "Where are you going? Come here," he tapped the rock beside him.

"Don't you have a job?" I asked once I was in ear shot, sitting on the place he had tapped.

"Yes, three weeks on, three weeks off," he acted like it was common knowledge. "So my love what have you been doing? Had any nude fights lately?" Tori just snickered from beside him.

"Not as of yet, but there is still hope for later," I didn't know what it was about John but every emotion disappeared around him, he pulled you out of the past and brought you to the present. Where it was just you and him, he was a mind buffer.

"I knew I should of taken the security job in the compound instead of at the fence, I didn't know shower fights were going on,"

"I'm sure you'd do a lot to stop it,"

"Maybe not stop it, but I would of turned the water on, it would have been much hotter if the water was still on,"

John and I sat talking on the rock for hours, even after Tori left for her shift at the tattoo parlor. Groups had come and gone, but we just sat there talking, about nothing and everything at the same time. He told me about the latest gossip, usually included names that meant nothing to me, but I didn't care. I told him about how initiation was going, how Four said I was doing good in the fear sims, even about Eric and mine talk on the roof top.

"He said that? Jesus, we've got to get out of here?" He grabbed my hand like he was going to pull me up.

"Why?" I questioned looking around the room, nothing seemed out of place.

"If Eric said all that I believe it's the end of days and the ceiling could collapse at any moment,"

"John!" Speak of the devil and he will appear, it was just proven.

"Eric!" John yelled back to Eric on the floor above us.

"Are you coming to eat or what?"

John and I said our goodbye when we got into the doorway of the dining hall, he went one way and I went to the other towards Ali's back in our usual spot.

"Dinner isn't much of a win for you either," She spoke drawing my attention to the table as I tucked my legs underneath it.

Meat, all Meat.

I quickly scanned the other tables around us, all meat.

A laugh was heard behind me, followed by an even deeper one.

I didn't need to turn to know who it was, Sara and her Bovine.

"Why are they laughing?" Ali dropped the food in her hand, "Oh my god what did they do to the food?" an alarmed look crossed her face, we had bit that hand that feed us.

"It's not what they did to it, Its what they aren't," Kyle spoke for the first time that day. He tilted his head towards the table to the meat pilled in the center. I instantly knew what he was trying to say.

"They are starving me out," I shot my head in the direction the laughs had come from.

There they sat eyes glazed over with evil, both of them eating an apple.

"I'm just going to act like I don't care," I looked back at Ali and Kyle.

"You will care in a couple of days when you've had nothing to eat," Kyle added, "They seem pretty determined in their mission,"

"This won't last that long, someone else will complain about all the meat,"

"I don't know about that," I didn't either, no one here really seemed like herbivores.

* * *

We had moved into a sort of pattern, breakfast, fear landscape, freedom, dinner, bed. Rewind and Repeat. All but me, I hadn't had anything to eat in five days, my stomach had turned into knots, it felt like my belly button was eating my spine, but I refused to back down. They would not win. Everyday Ali tried to convince me to try a piece of meat, but I refused remembering the puking incident.

"Just try a bite!" Alex pushed a piece of chicken towards me.

"No, that's them winning, me eating meat," I knew they were watching me, they did every meal as I calmly sat at the table, acting like nothing was wrong.

"Well you're going to have to eat something soon Lan, it's been five days," Ali pushed his fork out of my face.

"You think I don't know that?"

I had thought about asking John to get me some of Tori's food but he was on the his three weeks out, when I saw her in the hall one day I had attempted to ask her about it, but as I rounded around the corner in her direction Sara was sitting on the other side of her, were they friends? Did she know what they were doing to me? Did John know? As quickly as that thought passed though my mind I couldn't help but wonder, Did Eric know? If he did he clearly didn't care, he'd been everywhere with her since our talk on the roof, usually she was seen filling his glass, or rubbing his shoulders at dinner. If starvation hadn't made me feel sick that sight defiantly had.

"Come on it's time for fear sims," Alice stood from the table taking one more gulp of water, leading the way to the metal hall.

"Today we are going to do something different," Four was leaning against the door that lead to the fear chair. "The computers are on the fritz," there was less of an echo in the room today, it was filled with the transfers and the dauntless born.

"So your going to fight,"

Where had he come from? Eric walked passed the group of us to the front taking his place beside Four.

"Transfers vs Dauntless born, by your new ranking,"

They led us into the usual fighting room, excitement was heard all through the hall as we walked, wondering if they had moved up in ranking, no one was leaving yet, the second and final cut would be after the final fear scape two days from now.

At the front of the room stood the caulk board, the usual one column had been split into two, for the first time we saw how the Dauntless born ranked and who we were fighting.

**1)Lana Vs. Zach**

**2)Kyle vs Becky**

**3)Alice vs Lyn**

**4)Alex vs Reggie**

**5)Matt vs Tyler**

**6)Britney vs Cinder**

"This will be your last chance to change your ranking based off fighting skills, give it all you've got! Zach, Lana your up," Four reminded us that initiation was almost over, we'd either be in or be factionless.

My head spun from standing in one place to long, my stomach was bubbling, there was no way I could win. I had never seen Zach before, but when he stood up on the platform I didn't fathom how I could ever miss him. He must have been closer to 7 feet tall than 6 foot, he was giving Eric a run for his money on the piercings and his Mohawk was at least another 6 inches on his head. This muscles rippled as he took his t-shirt off, evidently he couldn't fight with a shirt on, goosebumps spread on my bare stomach, who was I to talk?

By the time we both got up there and ready the room was spinning, I needed to eat something once I left here, no matter what it was.

"Fight!" Eric yelled from his perch beside the ring.

Both of us had our arms up in usual fashion, but he was different then all the others, we didn't circle each other trying to syke each other out, he pounced, pulling both of us to the ground. We were in a mess of fists and knees, but none of the pain was resonating in my body, all it could think of was food, my mind along with it. A final grunt filled the air as a fist hit my face, but I wasn't sure if it came out of me or Zach as the world went black.

* * *

AN- I don't own anything, Not sure what I think about this chapter. Usually I have to make time to be on my computer, but I've been stuck in front of it all day, and still have another day with it.

Let me know what you think!

Reviews equal faster updates!

-Lana


	19. Chapter 19

Noise was heard in the far distance, rustling and quite whispering, I kept my eyes closed, I didn't have enough strength to open my eyes as the world got closer.

"She's severely under nourished, I don't think she blacked out from the fight, it's hunger," a female voice spoke to whoever else was in the room.

"So give her something for it," a deep voice sound rang out, I wasn't quite sure who's voice it was, but I had a feeling.

"Eric stop," I finally opened an eye, and felt a ting of disappointment as blue eyes met mine.

"Oh, sorry Four," I spoke to his face that read letdown.

"Make sure she eats, she'll be fine," the nurse informed Four as she left the room.

The word eat sent a rumble through my empty stomach.

"Why are you not eating?" Four asked as I sat up and began putting my boots on.

"I'm being starved out, it's not a big deal,"

"What do you mean being starved out? Confusion crossed his face.

"Well I pissed off Sara, she works in the kitchens, I don't eat meat, all they've been serving is meat for five days,"

"You haven't eaten in five days? Then you thought you could fight?" Four was offended.

"I didn't think I could fight, I thought I could do sims, I didn't know the computers messed up," I stood up, ready to leave, and my stomach rumbled so loud I swear the walls shook.

"Come on, we are going to the kitchens to get you food," Four grabbed my arm dragging me to the doors.

"NO! If I go in there and eat they won," I pulled my arm away from Four's hand.

"So, you're starving to death,"

"I won't starve to death, they are stupid, they will give up soon," I said more comforting myself than him.

"Follow me," he grabbed my arm once again.

"Where are we going?" I asked while he dragged me down the hall, after going down a set of steps and turning a few corners I thought he was taking me to Eric's room, but he passed his door and stopped at the next door.

"You live next door to Eric?" I asked Four, waiting for him to unlock it.

"Yes, why do you know where Eric's room is?" he opened the door holding it for me.

"John told me," I lied, how would I explain anything between me and Eric, I didn't know what it was even. I lightly shook my head trying to get thoughts of him to leave, which caused me to become even more dizzy.

"Sit!" he pointed at a bar stool in his kitchen. His room was set up just like Eric's and Tori's but his was cleaner, like no one was ever in here, except for the unmade bed and a few dirty cups in the sink.

"I think I have some kind of food in here," Four muttered.

"Why are you being so nice to me Four?" I questioned him.

"I'm not sure honestly," Four turned towards me, and walked over standing in front of me, "Your different Lana, it's like your me in female form or something," he reached out to the bruise on my face. My stomach rumbled again but I didn't think it was hunger, all I could think about was how soft his hands were, and how it didn't feel right that they were.

Before I even knew what happened Four's soft lips pressed against mine, instantly sending me into panic. It was wrong. _This is wrong_ the inner Lana yelled at me.

"I'm sorry, I can't," I pushed Four out of the ways tears already running, my stomach once again growled as I slammed his door behind me sliding down the wall beside his door. I still didn't get something to eat, I really was going to have to admit defeat and ask them for food.

"Was the sex that bad?" a smile almost crossed my face as his voice rang out. I looked up through my tears at Eric who was walking down the hall holding a bottle of booze. But as I opened my mouth to talk another sob came out with more tears. Eric pulled my hand ripping me off the floor and into his room that wasn't locked.

"What did he do?" Eric shoved me down on his recliner, his hands on either side of my head, his thick arms by my eyes.

"Nothing," I sniffled.

"Why are you sobbing in a hall outside his door?" his voice was full of anger, like usual.

"I'm starving," he shook his head as I spoke, I had said something he wasn't expecting.

"I'm starving," my stomach growled louder than ever, almost like the universe confirming my story for him to hear. For a moment he remained silent, thinking, but he didn't move his hands away and I took the moment to compose myself.

"Sara," he pieced the puzzle together moving away from me, I didn't turn my head in his direction, I kept staring at the blank wall of his living room, fighting the tears away. Moments later he came back into my sight handing me a plate full of fruit.

"You haven't eaten in that long?" he asked sitting down on the couch across from me, while I dug into the food.

"If I did they would be winning, like they are now," I didn't care as I popped three grapes into my mouth, the juices filled my mouth as I bit into them and it was the best moment I've had so far in Dauntless, it tasted like cake, or liquid gold.

"Your going to choke," Eric smirked over at me from the couch.

"I don't care," I took a big bite of cheese. I continued to eat the things on the plate, but Eric's smirk grew larger as I began coughing on a piece of banana.

"Told you," He handed me the bottle he had been nursing since the hall, I tilted my head back taking a huge gulp of the substance, it warmed my chest all the way down but the licorice flavor didn't offend me, it wasn't half bad, I tilted back and took another swallow.

"Easy Killer, that's all I've got for the night," he grabbed the bottle back out of my hand. He reached out and grabbed my plate as well, "You need to stop your stomach has shrunk, you'll make yourself sick," an angry look spread across my face.

"No, I wasn't done, who knows when I'll eat again, your girlfriend is trying to starve me out,"

"Oh god, how many times do I have to tell you, she's not my fucking girlfriend you jealous bitch," he didn't wait for me to snap back while he took my unfinished plate out to the kitchen, this time I allowed my eyes to follow. The small bar between the kitchen and living room were covered in empty bottles, some matching the one he had now, some were different. A bag of chips was on the floor and it looked like someone had been sleeping on the couch.

"You need a maid," I informed him while my stomach moaned happily.

"Well clean, I'll think of a way to pay you," he smirked tossing the plate back in the fridge.

"Somehow I have an feeling my idea of payment and your idea are different," he took his place back on the couch.

"Not if you listen to your inner self, that girl I could work with," he rubbed his hand together, licking his dry lips.

"Don't flatter yourself," I huffed trying not to laugh at our bickering.

"I've got someone who does that for me too, you couldn't handle this if you tried," he leaned back wearing his signature smirk, "Your to Amity,"

I was on my feet suddenly, making my way towards him.

_Stop Lana, stop, no. no. no _ my inner self was screaming.

I pushed him back so hard his head hit the wall behind the couch and his smirk disappeared while straddling his lap and smashing my face against his. I was going to be in control this time, I wouldn't allow him to take control.

A crash was heard as his bottle shattered against the floor, his hand no longer full came up to my hips, the more he tried to take control the more I fought him, pushing him back as he tried to move.

He reached his hand up and grabbed the ponytail that hung down my back, tugging it to move our faces apart

"There is the girl I like so much," his smirk was back, but his lips were slightly puffed from the rough kisses.

"I'm no different," I didn't move off his lap, but I couldn't help the smile on my face as I looked him over.

"Yes you are, you're acting like the girl you are, not the damn girl you think your suppose to be," his smirk left once again and he looked serious.

"Oh don't go all sensitive on me now," I pushed him back again pressing our lips together.

For ten, twenty, thirty minutes, we stayed like that, our lips were melted into one, we moved as a unit, neither in charge, but if he tried to take it, I'd put him back in his place, slamming him down again.

_Alana, what are you doooing? _

There she was again, my mind.

I pulled back, but for a second I wasn't sure if my lips would go with my face, or be stuck to his for eternity.

He immediately pulled my hair trying to drag me back down.

"I've got to go, Ali will be looking for me," a cold spot formed right under the band of my jeans where one of his hand had been seating.

"Oh by all means," he smirked at me while I climbed off him, I started to slip in the liquor on the floor until he reached out and grabbed my arm to steady me.

"So you made me spill the last of the booze till shipment tomorrow, and now your leaving me,"

"Oh bless your heart," I smirked turning away from him. "and tell your fucking girlfriend, her plan isn't going to work," I stepped into the hall.

"JEALOUS!" he yelled before I slammed the door behind me.

"Lana, I looked for you," Four's blue eyes met mine as I began down the hall, "Were you in Eric's room?" he questioned, the veins in his arm grew.

"I was raiding his fridge," I shrugged my shoulders and walked down the hall, an end to an interesting day, but I couldn't help but notice I stood a little taller as I walked.

* * *

AN- I'm trying not to rush anything that a major critique I get, but at the same somethings got to get rolling one way or that other lmao.

Let me know what you think. I love all my Reviewers! I'm at 95 reviews right now, think I could break 100 for an update?

-Lana


	20. Chapter 20

"Lana, there is fruit!" Ali quietly screeched at breakfast that morning, it was too easy. Had Sara given up that fast? After the small bit of food I had eaten at Eric's I felt like I could play this game for at least another week. I did a quick scan of the other tables, they all contained fruit. Maybe someone had thrown a fit, or they had run out of meat? Most of the tables had oranges on them, but ours had a mixture of oranges and apples, my favorite. Someone else must be running the kitchens today. While Ali fixed her plate I tried to contain myself waiting till she was ready to enjoy breakfast.

"Well go on, I know your hungry," she gestured egging me on. The outer skin of the apple was crisp as my teeth passed through it, but instantly a sort of gagging noise came out of my throat. I flung the apple back on the table spitting what was in my mouth out as well.

"Oh god that's gross," Ali turned her head away from what I had just thrown on the table, the inside of the apple was completely rotten.

"So these bitches wanna play games," I muttered looking around the hall for them, it didn't take long to find them.

"ERRYY!" the squeal caught my attention as Eric made his way into the dining hall looking rougher than usual, his skin had a gray tint to it, he was slightly hunch over as he walked and his hair was flat to his head, but what really gave it away was his head slamming down onto the table once he took his seat.

"Well, I guess he had a rough night," Ali laughed in their direction.

"Looks like it," I laughed along with her, but I couldn't help but wonder what happened to him, I knew it wasn't hung over he spilled the last of his drink on the ground.

"Have you heard anything about the computers?" Alex asked taking a seat beside me, reaching for an apple as I slapped it out of his hand.

"Trust me, you don't want that," I showed him my apple.

"What the hell?"

"Sara," Ali and I both said at the same time.

"That's messed up," he muttered, reaching for the food in the middle, inspecting it before he sat anything on his plate.

"Four are the computers fixed yet?" Kyle asked as the weight on the bench beside me shifted. I didn't look as yesterday popped into my head.

"Yeah," he didn't say anything else.

"I've got to go..brush my teeth, see you later," I told Ali squeezing out from in between Four and Alex.

"Hey!" Ali yelled getting up from her seat, kissing Kyles cheek coming around the table, "I've got to brush mine too,"

Once we got into the hall she fell into step with me, "What was that all about?" she asked looking over at me.

"What was what?" I questioned right back.

"With Four, I could have cut the awkwardness between you too, and he took you to the infirmary yesterday, and your lips look like they've been stuck in a vacuum for days," I reached up to my lips feeling the tenderness of them.

"See, are you with Four?" A huge smile spread across her mouth.

"No, god No," I looked her in the eye with all seriousness.

"Don't lie, I can smell a liar a mile away and girl, you reek," she still had a smile.

"Well he kissed me.."

"EEK!" she squealed, but I continued talking.

"But I didn't want it, I didn't like it," I honestly told her, knowing she would see in the truth in my eyes.

"How did that happen?" she asked as we stepped into our room. I explained what happened after I woke up in the hospital, leaving out what happened after I left Four's, if she didn't ask it wasn't lying.

"Well, a simple kiss did that to your lips?" damn.

"I...um..."

"You're not ready to tell me, and I'm not going to push it," she smiled, how did she know, why was she so great.

"You know, your my first friend," I informed her as I felt tears I would never let fall weld up.

"Your not my first friend, but you're my first real friend," she reached out wrapping her arms around my shoulders, my first hug.

* * *

"So what are you going to do about finding your grandfather?" Ali asked while we walked to our simulation training.

I had been so wrapped up in the drama I forgot the real task at hand.

"I don't know, I think I blew it with the one real person who could help me," she knew I was talking about Four.

"Yeah, probably, What about John?" she knew we were close.

"He's gone for two more weeks, I might not see him again," she stopped walking.

"Why wouldn't you see him again?"

"Well our final test is the day after tomorrow, if I don't make it than I will be gone before I get back,"

"Lana, you're number one," she snorted, "What makes you think your leaving,"

"I lost yesterday,"

"Yeah everyone lost yesterday, except for Alex and ME!" she screeched! I had been so ate up with myself that I forgot to ask what happened after I left. "At most you might of moved down to third,"

"You won! I'm so proud!" I smiled at her, I needed to let it be about her, I owed it to her.

"We are in Lana, we aren't going anywhere," she grinned at me.

"We don't know what fears we will face yet," they had us repeating the same three over and over again that it slipped your mind there were more to come.

"Well I'll win for you and you win for me," she reached out and grabbed my hand, "If we leave.."

"We leave together," I squeezed her hand.

* * *

"Five minutes, your lowering your time," Four informed me emotionless as I collected myself in the chair, I faced my father again.

" That one is the longest one, I paralyze," he just nodded his head in the corner.

"Four, about yesterday," he quickly turned.

"Lana don't,"

"No hear me out, it's not you, there is nothing wrong with you, you're great, it's just I'm not interested in being with anyone right now,"

"Anyone but Eric," he muttered.

"I'm not right for you, like you said we are two in one," I ignored the Eric comment. "Life with me would be so plain if you knew what was coming next," I smiled at him trying to lighten the mood.

"I knew the second I did it I shouldn't' have, I tried to tell you, but I couldn't find you, then I saw you coming out of his room and I got mad all over again," he confessed, "You're just so different than anyone I've met,"

"You'll meet much better, trust me."

"Are you saying there is better than us Lana?" a real smiled crossed his face.

"Probably not," I smiled back, "Four?"

"Lana?"

"What's your real name?"

"Five, why?"

* * *

AN- I don't own anything divergent.

Short I know.

I wrote this for chapter 19 but left like it was to long, so I'm making it chapter 20 since ya'll got me to 100 reviews so fast.

-Lana


	21. Chapter 21

"Wake up," Four startled all of us, we weren't used to him barging into our rooms in the morning. "We're going to run the sim early, so you can have the rest of the day to prepare for tomorrow,"

I was too warm to get up so I rolled over so I was facing the wall, snuggling down further into my blankets.

**SMACK**

My left butt cheek stung

"Eric is with us today so we can do two at once and get it over with,"

I didn't need to roll over to know what had just happened.

Soon I felt his hot breath on my neck, "GET UP!" he screamed in my ear ripping my blankets off my body before walking away.

"Ali, you've got to get up," Four spoke beside my bed in a much calmer tone than Eric had tried to wake me, she just pulled her blankets over her head.

"Four more minutes...Four!" she told him as he yanked the blankets off her body, Four For and the number 4 were starting to confuse us all..

"I won't miss this at all," weight shifted my bed as Ali sat on the bottom putting on her boots.

"I bet they don't even wake up like this in the factonless,"

"Are you two coming?" Eric asked from the door, "Or do you have naked wrestling do tend to?"

"Are we ever going to live that down?" I asked her slipping on a pair of shorts.

"Oh honey, any publicity is good publicity," she handed me my boots laughing.

"Hey," A profound voice said beside me, while a tall Mohawk sat down beside me.

"Hey, Zach Right?" I smiled over at him.

"Yeah, I had to come compliment you, you hit harder than any of us," he pointed up at his black eye and random bruises on his arm.

"Um, thanks I think," I continued to smile,"I wasn't really trying, I didn't feel well that day,"

A smirk formed on his face, "I knew you didn't pass out because of me, I thought you were going to win, then bam you were out," I didn't know what to say to that, so I said nothing at all, "There is a party tonight, will you come?" he asked still smirking.

"Um, where is it?" I asked.

"That I can't tell you, we meet up at the tracks after dinner, bring someone with if you want,"

"Who is going?"

"Well it's mostly for the us Dauntless born, its tradition, but other dauntless members will be there.

"Okay, tracks after dinner, I'll be there,"

"Cool,"

"Lana, Zach, come on," Four called us into the room there was still just one seat in the middle.

"What are we setting on each others laps?" I asked as Zach slammed down in the seat, tapping a place on his lap. He instantly reminded me of John.

"No," Eric snapped, "Since Zach is down, you come with me Lana,"

"I'll go with you Eric, I was just messing with Lana," Zach stood up off the seat.

"No I got this, lets get it over with," he dragged me into the hall and to a door next door, which was identical to the room we just left.

"What was that?" Eric asked walking up to the computer booting it up while I sat on the chair.

"What was what?" I questioned having no clue what he was talking about, I watched as he sat on the stool in front of the computer and turned towards me.

"What were you and your boyfriend making plans for tonight?" an ugly look present on his face.

"Who me and Four? No we just got done messing around before you came in the room," I smirked at him. Little did he know what happened the other night.

"Zach," he said crossing his arms over his chest, his muscles flexed.

"Oh please, it's none of your business, can we get this over with," I pointed at the needed on the tray.

"It is my business, everything I say is my business is,"

"Eric, nothing I do is your business, you don't own me, hell I don't even know you," I snapped back.

"You know more than anyone else, but John." He swallowed deep.

"What your don't tell your girlfriend all sorts of things about yourself and your tattoos?"

"I don't tell anyone anything, and no one but you is stupid enough to question me,"

"Eric,"

"Lana," he spoke back before I could finish my sentence.

"If you're so closed out to everyone why do you keep bothering me?" but the real question is why did I care?

"Because now you know to much,"

"I barley know anything about you," he prepped the needle for the sim, coming up behind me in the chair.

"That's to much," He leaned over me putting the needle in my neck, but I couldn't help but notice he grimaced at the needle in my neck more than I did.

"What kind of party?" Ali asked me at dinner, still no food but meat, but I couldn't help but notice people were beginning to complain about wanting potatoes, or even a vegetable.

"I'm not sure, he just said to bring somebody and be at the tracks after dinner," I shrugged watching her eat, trying to hold in the saliva in my mouth.

"Well we can't go in this!" she threw her fork down, quickly standing up.

"What's wrong with this?" I asked her, gesturing down at my shorts and t shirt.

"No, come on!" she directed me back to our dorm where we kept our clothes.

She began digging through my one drawer for clothes, I didn't know what she thought she would find in there.

"Put these on," She whipped out a pair of skinny jeans and a black cropped tank top that was tight around the top but flared out in draping out the middle before ending right underneath by belly button leaving a gap between the top of my jeans, and I began tucking the jeans into my boots and added my red beanie to the top of my head leaving in slouchy in the back.

"Better?" I asked holding my arms out so she could inspect me.

"Better," she stated as she slipped her dress on over he head.

"Isn't Kyle going to wonder where we are?" I asked her as she finished getting dressed, pulling her dirty blond hair into a bun onto of her head.

"He can wonder all he wants, he doesn't own me, will Eric wonder where you are?" She questioned a smirk on her face.

"What? Why would Eric care where I was?" my heart dropped to my stomach.

"Oh don't play stupid with me Lan, when a girl had lips swollen like that, it's not hard to tell who its from," she paused adjusting herself in the mirror.

"Well, its.."

"Girl he's fine, there is nothing to be embarrassed about," she continued.

"It's not like that," she turned an eye to look at me.

"We are not together, we hate each other, it was just a kiss,"

"Lana, if that was just a kiss than the war was just an disagreement, come on dinner with be over soon,"

"LANA!" Zach yelled out of the crowd lifting a bottle calling me forward.

"Hey," I said once I got close to him, Ali followed.

"I'm glad you came!" he handed me the bottle lifting it wanting me to take a drink, I complied.

"That's right," people cheered from beside me, surprised I had taken a drink.

A few minutes later more people filed out of the dining hall, we must have been early. I couldn't help but notice Sara in the group of people, and surprisingly Four.

"Wow, I thought all he did was work," Ali smiled in his direction.

"Who knows, maybe he isn't a robot," I smiled at her while everyone began running for the train.

"And here Ladies and Gentlemen is where the party will be this year!" A pretty girl yelled from the opening of the train, before bailing out, followed by everyone else on the train.

"Ready?" I asked Ali as we made our way to the front, once again we were jumping into the unknown.

"HELL YEAH!" she yelled before our feet left the train.

The crowd lead into the dark end of the city, we were close to the abnegation's part of the city, the roads were cracked and filled with pot holes.

I jumped about 100 feet as two arms wrapped around my shoulder, "I'm so glad you're coming with," the redhead from war games, Becky, caught up with us. Her hands were full of bottles.

"Want some help?" I asked reaching out for the bottles which she handed to me.

"Are you ready for tomorrow?" she asked adjusting backpack straps on her shoulders, the clang of bottles clanked with more bottles.

"As I'll ever be," and Ali agreed.

After five more minutes of walking through the city the group finally started walking into a building. Cheers echoed through the building that was gutted on the first floor, the only thing in it was a bright red spiral staircase. You could hear the music blaring down the stairs, and everyone was pushing and struggling to get up the stairs.

"You're going to be my poker buddy!" All of a sudden Zach came up behind me while we pushed up the stairs, he was holding a bunch of bottles as well, if nothing else we wouldn't die thirsty.

"Your what?" I questioned as we finally got to the top of the stairs, the walls had been painted black with black light painted designs all over them and a little table was sit up with someone running the music, every person that walked in sat some bottles on a long table against the back wall with a bunch of plastic cups, and in the right corner there was a green felt table with a light hanging over the top.

"You've never played poker before?" Zach stopped completely shocked.

"Um, no" I shook my head.

"Well I'll teach you how, but lets get a drink first,"

I had really got a hold on this poker thing, you would never even know I had never played before by the height of my chips.

"Beginners luck man," the guy beside Zach muttered as I pulled some more chips towards me, taking another gulp of my drink. Zach had quickly kicked me off from being his partner when he saw how good I was at playing. I could hang on my own. The only thing he did was keep my drink full and try to make me loose.

"So what happens when I have _all _the chips?" I didn't even sound like myself as I slurred, Zach was very good at keeping my cup full.

"Bitch." he muttered when I finally won.

When I stood up for the first time in hours it left like my head tried to roll off my shoulders, but I knew I needed to find Ali, I hadn't seen her in hours.

After hours of partying the music was still pumping but people had began sitting down in small circles talking to each other, taking a break, and some were just passed out. Finally I saw Ali with her back pressed against the wall talking to Becky and Four was on the other side of Becky.

"ALI!" I said a little louder than I meant to, sitting down a little harder than I meant to.

"Hey Lan," she smiled at me, she had a fine layer of sweat all over her from dancing all night.

"Oh, someones had some drinks," Becky said in my direction.

"I'm fine," I smiled at her.

"Sure you are I'll ask you again in the morning," she smiled back at me.

"I think I'm ready to go back, the train is going to pass soon, are you coming?" she yawned standing up.

"No, I'm not ready yet," I took another swallow of my drink, "I think I'm gonna stay,"

"Well I'll stay too then," she kind of look disappointed, preparing herself to sit back down.

"Ali I'm fine, you're tired, go back," she looked down at me as Zach slammed down beside me handing me another drink.

"I'll make sure she gets back Ali, don't worry," Zach promised Al as she and Becky made their way downstairs.

"Well then it was two," Zach said dragging me off to the booze table, my cup was empty again, "I've got to piss," he informed me after filling his cup before walking away.

"Well if it isn't the slut, all alone," Sara's annoying voice rang out, wrecking my buzz.

"What do you want Sara?" I asked taking another drink.

"You to stay away from our men!" she pointed a finger in my chest.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked looking her over as the oxen filled up the space behind her.

"Eric, Four, now ZACH!" she was drawing a crowd, many people remembered the show from last time.

"I still don't know what your talking about Sara, whatever you've heard from Britney, it's bullshit now get out of my way," I tried to push past her, but her friend stopped me.

"Listen to me and listen to me good, you will not, never, ever, touch Eric. All of you transfer girls come in thinking your going to take the good Dauntless boys, well I've got news for you, it's not going to happen this time," Four's eyes filled the circle, but that didn't matter, the gray eyes from behind him drew me in.

"Well I've got a news flash for you too Sylvia, you or anybody else, don't tell me what to do," the room filled with cheers, apparently Sara didn't have as many friends as she thought she did.

"Stay away from him," she pushed my chest.

I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of fighting her, I was going to get her right where it hurt.

I pushed past her and the small circle, walked right up to Eric pushed him against the wall and my mouth against his.

After a few moments Eric pushed me off him, grabbing my hand.

"Lets get out of here,"

Once we were outside he began dragging me down the street away from the train tracks.

"Eric, where are we going now, I'm not going to sleep with you," I still had my cup in my other hand. I finished the drink and threw the cup down. No longer feeling the affects of the drink.

"No shit Sherlock," he continued to pull me.

"Who is Sherlock?" I asked pulling my hand out of his grasp and walking beside him.

"It's from a book," he looked at me like I was nuts.

"You're such a nerd," he snapped his head in my direction, "Really where are we going Eric, I wasn't done at the party,"

"Yes you were, we are going back to dauntless,"

"Even if I was going to listen to you, the train is the other way,"

"I know, I didn't take the train here," he continued walking down the streets, "I brought my motorcycle," we stopped in front of his bike.

"Where did you get one of these?" I had only seen them in school books, the frame was a shiny metal black, solid black no design, no shady flames. Simple. Eric.

"All leaders have a form of transportation, this is mine," he straddled the bike.

"I'm not getting on that thing," I informed him while my eye brows raised.

"Yes you are," he stood back up and lunged at me, lifting me up and putting me on the bike. "Stay still you old drunk," he insulted while getting on the front of the bike, "Hold on,"

"What if I don't?"

"Then fall off," he started the bike and revved off, instantly my arms wrapped around him.

"That's what you get for being a stubborn bitch." I didn't need to see his face to know he was smirking.

Once we got back to the compound I quickly hopped off his bike,

"You're trying to kill me!" I screeched punching his back.

"No I'd throw you off the chasm if I wanted to kill you,"

"Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow," I started down the hall towards the pit.

"Wait, you need something to eat, or your going to be sick in the morning," he put his kick stand down and waked the other way.

"I'm fine," I informed him but followed anyways.

"You're eating,"

He never locked his door.

"I've got fruit, and..that's about all,"

I sat down on his chair, while he fixed my plate. All the fights with Sara ran through my head, who was she to tell me who I would and would not be with, she didn't even know me.

"Eat," he handed me a plate full of fruit. Anger filled my body, one more person was telling me what to do.

"Everyone needs to STOP telling me what to do," I threw the plate down on the ground. "Don't kiss him, don't talk to him, eat this, don't eat that, don't punch that way, you run to slow," I threw my hands up. "I'm sick of it!"

I tried to make my way to the door before he grabbed me.

"Well then don't listen to them," were his words before he pushed me down on the couch.

AN- Going to be gone for a few days, let me know what you think.

-LANA


	22. Chapter 22

A thumping in my head was the first thing to wake me up in the morning, or what I assumed was morning. I could hear Ali snoring beside me, only adding to the drums in my head.

"Ali, stop snoring," I yelled out, reaching up for my head.

"Why the fuck are you up," his voice rang out.

I jumped up a thousand feet,

"Eric!" I yelled, the events of last nights passed through my head, or most of them.

"Lana?" he asked rolling over, to look at me.

"Why the hell am I in your bed?" I sat up in the bed, glad to see my clothes were still on.

"I was wondering the same thing,"

"Really? You don't know why I'm in your bed?"

"Oh, I know why your in my bed, I don't know why your STILL in my bed,"

"Oh please," I fought through the pumping in my head putting my bare feet on the floor.

"Lan, I was kidding." he stood up out of bed, his shirt was off and his muscles were rippling in usual fashion. "Lana, it's like five in the morning, get back in bed,"

"There you go telling me what to do again," I pushed my way past him.

"Lana, please get back in my bed,"

"Are you serious?" a small smirk passed over my face.

"Serious about what?" he looked confused.

" You're asking me something? Not telling me to do it?"

"Yes now get your ass back in the bed," he was already on his way back.

"Well, you made a small progression."

"Stop talking I'm asleep," he ripped the blankets off the other side of the bed for me.

"You are so rude," I laid down in the bed and pulled the covers up to my chin.

"Your a bitch,"

I opened my mouth to reply but his arm wrapping around my stomach stopped any of the words. I instantly tensed.

I looked over at him, not believing he was actually attempting to cuddle with me to see him open one eye.

"What are you doing, you're acting like I'm going to rape you or something,"

"That would surprise me less than you doing this," I motioned down to where he was wrapped around me.

"Go to sleep," he wiggled down on his side right beside me, but didn't remove his arms.

"Don't let me miss my fear scape,"

"Shut up,"

I think I fell asleep before my eyes shut.

Hours later I woke up to him lightly snoring, but I could no longer sleep, looking around the whole apartment was lite up buy the sun. There was nothing new in the apartment and the mess still remained. The bed shifted as Eric rolled over on his back, taking his arm of from around me, but still not waking up.

How could someone so mean be so cute when they slept?

His blond hair was messed up and sticking up in all directions, he had protruding dark circles underneath his eyes that even though they were closed mesmerized me. His neck was thick but not veiny unless they were covered by his thick black tattoos. I got the chance to check them all out, but something else caught my eye, his neck was covered in thick perfect circle scars. I leaned my head forward hoping to get a better look at them, they were everywhere. But one was particularly sticking out, begging for me to touch it.

"What are you doing now?" Eric rubbed the sleep out of his eye before catching me with my hand reached out.

"Um, I was just," what would I tell him, I was caught red handed.

"They are nothing," he pulled the blanket up higher on his neck.

"What kind of nothing did that?" I asked.

"It's none of your business," he shot up in the bed, to which I followed.

"I thought I knew to much, what is a little bit more?" I asked, still looking at them.

"Get out," he pointed at the door.

"Eric, I didn't mean too.."

"GET OUT!"

AN: Short I know but this is for the people saying there isn't enough Eric/Lana. It's just a little pop of something.

Gone till probably Monday

-LANA


	23. Chapter 23

"Are you ready Lana?" Four was going to come into our dorm room and get us one by one for our test.

"Yeah I guess," I was hoping I would still be here when Ali got back, but she had left before me, everyone had, I was going last.

"You couldn't of made me wait any longer could you?" I tried to joke to slow down my heart.

"Well, since your the last one, no." I could of kissed him on the cheek for joking back, he knew what I was doing.

"Um, last night, did you get home okay?" Four asked, I had completely forgot that Four was at the party, that I probably pushed him out of the way to get to Eric.

"Yeah, I was just sick of those girls harassing me," I tried to justify why I would attack Eric's face like that.

"So you thought eating Eric's face would make them leave you alone?" He half smiled at me.

"I didn't think that plan all the way out,"

"Just be careful," we stopped walking and he turned to me.

"I am, I mean I think their bark is bigger than their bite,"

"Not from them Lana," he took a moment trying to configure what he was going to say next, "Eric has a reputation, and usually I say ignore what they say about people, but I live next door from him, I can hear the doors slamming, and the girls laughing, bottles crashing when he flips out and wrecks the place," he looked anywhere but at my face.

"I was just messing with them, Four, nothing is going on," so much for slowing my heart down.

"I've seen the way he looks at you when he thinks no one is looking Lana, he's not just messing with you," he actually sounded like he was trying to help Eric for a minute, "But he's dangerous,"

"Okay, thank you Four, but I'm a big girl, I got this," I slapped his back and began walking down the path.

* * *

"Lana Eversong, Ranked second, Amity transfer." Four spoke to the room as we made our way to the middle. I wasn't quite sure who he was introducing me to at first, the room was filled with Dauntless leaders who already knew me, one in particular was staring bullets at me, standing next to Max, but then I saw beside him stood Jeanie and a few other Erudite holding computer pads.

"Stab him as fast as you can, Lana, to the rest just like you usually do, there will be new stuff, get through it as fast as you can, but if you can't beat it just calm down."

"Okay," I whispered to him, my heart was about to fly out of my chest, or maybe I'd make my second puking show in Dauntless.

"You're not going anywhere Lana," he smiled at me while picking up the needle, "You're stuck with us forever,"

This needle felt different, it was thicker, if I had known it was going to feel like this, it probably would have been one of my fears, I was sure I'd have a perfect circle bruise on my neck, then I'd look like..

My head flew up to look at Eric, he was grunting at the needle pushed in my skin, his eyes beginning to glaze. His scars were needle marks. I didn't have time to assess the situation, before I was dragged away into the Sim.

The first three flew by like nothing, counted the bricks, pretended there weren't a million cockroaches on me, and stabbed my father as fast as I could, but who knew what was next.

Suddenly I was gone from Amity farms and back in the pit of Dauntless. I didn't see any sudden danger, no bugs or crazy fathers, Sara wasn't even here.

"Okay..." I said out loud to myself, not sure why I was here. Then I realized I shouldn't be talking to myself, remembering all of the people in the room watching me.

I had spoken to soon on the Sara front, soon she came shuffling into the room with Eric on her tail.

"Is she believing you Erry," he voice was still nauseating. But he just smiled at the nickname.

"Yes babe, I told you we'd convince her," he grabbed her chin and quickly kissed her.

"Oh lord," I spoke to the two but they couldn't hear me, I wasn't scared I was just annoyed but this.

"You know she's afraid of cooking," Eric informed Sara, smiling. He didn't smile.

"Well that's how we'll have to do away with her," she kissed him again.

Eric would never do this, help Sara he didn't want to help anyone but himself. But I couldn't help but notice my heart was beating abnormally fast, maybe he would? Trick me so he can tell everyone my secrets, I knew I had been too rude to him right away, maybe he was after me. My self conscious seemed to think so, than Ali and John came in.

"God I had to get away from her, she's driving me nuts," Ali spoke while she hugged Sara, I knew they were talking about me.

"Eric your doing well she's got a crush on you," John tapped Eric on the back.

No one was really my friend, they were trying to get me. Convince me they were to really hurt me in the end.

_'Calm down,' _

Four's voice rang in my head, a warning to get my heart rate down. I knew he wasn't really talking to me, but my conscious must have four's voice everything in Sims sounded like Four.

I stood behind the rock's listening to them detailed explanation of everything they were doing, all the while trying to think of anything and everything else.

They wouldn't really do this to me, Ali had no reason to be my friend, she just genuinely wanted to be. John either. I knew they wouldn't.

Quickly the scene changed.

I was standing on top of the fence, the tippy top.

"LANA HELP!" I heard Ali before I saw her, she was standing right at the edge, with a darker shadow behind her, and a gun pointed right at her temple, the face was washed out, the guy didn't matter, it was Ali and the gun.

I quickly ran over to her.

"It's okay Ali,"

"No it's not he's going to kill me!" she cried, instantly my face was wet from tears too.

"I won't let him," I said and the man's laugh scared us even more.

"LANA!" she yelled out, "HELP ME!"

How? I couldn't help her, I wouldn't fit around them to get to the other side without falling off, and she would die anyways, and I couldn't sneak up on him he was in front of me.

"You're taking to long," the generic voice spoke, and cocked the gun.

I couldn't loose my best friend, the girl who helped me fight my wars, helped me break in the control room, she would probably take a bullet for me.

_'Now you're getting it,' _ Four's voice again.

"SHOOT ME INSTEAD!" I yelled to the figure, as Ali screamed and tried to worm out of his hand.

"Ali it's fine, I'll be okay," I tried to comfort her, moving closer for the man.

I didn't even hear the gun shoot over Ali's screams. The second the bullet hit me I was shot back off the edge of the fence, but I wasn't dead.

"Lana," a little voice spoke, "Lana," I small hand slapped my arm. I opened my eyes to see my little sister Becky only she wasn't five months old any longer, she was probably three.

"Come on Lanny, I need your help" she pulled me off the ground. I was back at Amity, but instead of the fields I was right in the middle of where they held their meetings, at the top of the small hill stood the hot box.

"Becky, what are we doing here?" I questioned hunched over to follow her short form, she wouldn't let go of my hand.

"I've lost my teddy, charlie, don't you remember him?" she questioned, "He used to be yours, it's all you left for me."

I knew what she was talking about, a little pink bear I'd had since as long as I could remember, when Becky turned four months she instantly took a liking to it and would start crying whenever she saw it, holding her little arms out for it.

"Where is he?" I asked her looking down at our joined hand, I could see them, but I couldn't feel her against me.

"You've got him," she informed me but continued to pull me.

"What do you mean Becky?" I continued to follow against my better judgment.

"I'm going to show you," her juvenile voice rang on ever surface of my brain. We continued up the hill until we were right in front of the box, I instantly felt panic and smelt something horrible.

"Becky, what is that smell?" It smelled like..sewer but worse, it burned my eyes, nose and the taste was in my mouth.

"You and Charlie" she said, the smell didn't seem to bother her, "Look," she directed me towards the box. "Please get my Teddy,"

"I'll get you a new teddy, don't worry about Charlie," I lied to her, I didn't want to go anywhere near that box.

Suddenly she started crying and huge alligator tears fell, " I want Charlie," she continued to cry.

"Fine, I'll get him,"

I moved closer to the box, and the smell continued to get worse, I felt vomit weld up in the back of my throat. I turned back around and Becky was still standing there with tears in her eyes.

The door of the box was cracked open, and you could feel the heat radiating out of it, from years of being in the sun with no windows. I reached out for the box moving the door further open and felt a sliver of wood push into my palm. But none of that mattered once the sunlight shown into the box, I pinpointed what smelt in a millisecond, I was laying in the middle of the box, or at least a copy of me. The box was so small my feet were touching one side while my head rested against the kitty corner side of it, with my legs bent so I would even fit. I tried to adjust myself to fit in the door, but I had to go inside ways, there was no way I'd fit in just going straight through. The box had been made for little kids, but clearly they didn't care. I could see on the copy of myself that my shirt was ripped on the biggest part of my hips and my skin looked like raw hamburger meat where someone had shoved me though anyways. My skin was tanner than usual, but I knew it was just filth, which what was making the smell.

"Do you see him? He's been in there with you for so long?" Becky's little head was in the doorway of the box.

"How long have me and Charlie been missing?" I asked her, but kept staring at myself on the ground.

"Since before the snow, it's come and gone now." she said, "I've missed him so much, do you see him?"

I continued to check myself out, my shirt was three times to big, but I remembered that shirt, it always fit just right, before mom threw it away. My jeans were the same way, hanging off of me. I could count the ribs underneath my chest, the bones on my arms were popping out like they were ripping my skin, and my usually flat stomach was puffed out from malnutrition. I was being starved to death.

"Charlie!" she yelled pointing to the corner where he sat, just as dirty as I was. I had to get him for her, I knew that, but I was so scared for myself I didn't dare leave.

"Becky why am I in here?" I asked making my way over to Charlie stepping over myself.

"You were naughty daddy said, you ran away." she had her eyes on her teddy, nothing else.

"Do you know where I went?" I asked her little form.

"With the bad people in the middle of town,"

I picked up her teddy, it was still soft after all of these years, and the second I handed it to her I woke up, I could no longer get any answers.

"Good job!" Four stood over me when I opened my eyes.

"I need to go back, I wasn't ready," I whispered to him, remembering all the people in the room watching.

"Lana, you think that was real?" he questioned his eyebrows forming into one.

"I know it was," I said to him, "I remember that,"

* * *

"Okay here's rank! The last four are out! This is a complete total of all the things you've done," Max spoke still not turning the board around. Everyone in Dauntless was in the small pit watching to see who would make it, who would be Dauntless and who would be out. " You've got scores from jumping, shooting, throwing knifes, fighting, sims and war games, all of them totaled up and put against each other, dauntless born and transfers alike.

He turned the board over and screams were heard from everyone cheering for either family or for their favorite kid.

But I was to occupied to look, I was scanning the room for Britney, I needed to ask her what she knew, why I went to the factionless.

"We did it!" Ali's arms wrapped around my shoulders jumping up and down. That was the only thing drawing me out of my hunt to look at the board.

**Zach**

**Lana**

**Becky**

**Alice**

**Alex**

**Kyle**

**Lyn**

**Reggie**

Second? I was SECOND! And Ali was fourth. We really had made it.

All my friends had made it! I couldn't help but jump up and down with her circling each other.

"And that bitch Britney is gone!" Ali said in a sing song voice.

"I need to talk to her!" I stopped jumping and scanned the room.

"She's already gone!" she informed me.

"Why?" I had to yell over the crowd.

"She knew she was out, she didn't want to stay for the party," I sighed in defeat I would never know what she knew now. I pushed my way through the crowd wanting to be alone. I still felt leery of what I had seen in my sim earlier.

"You did it," Eric stood at the back of the crowd, smiling.

"Was there ever a question?" I joked with him.

"Well let me be the first one to say, Welcome to Dauntless,"

* * *

AN: Okay I'm really gone for a while this time, I'm all to generous with my chapter updates, had this one written for a while, not sure how I feel about it.

Reviews for Updates, next one either sunday or monday.

-LANA


	24. Chapter 24

Eric's POV- Two days earlier

After Lana got herself knocked out by Zach I had a hard time paying attention to the rest of the fights, every word and whisper in the room filled my brain. I tried to un-fist my hands, it took everything I had not to punch Zach in the face, until I heard him turn and whisper to the redheaded girl, "I'm not the one that knocked her out, she had me, she was going to win, and then she just was gone,"

Four had carried her crumbled form out of the room when she fell,the thought made me sick, Four was always after what was mine, even if I hadn't decided what I was going to do with her yet.

There was no real progress in the ranking, almost all of the Dauntless born had won once it was over, but no one really moved spaces for losing, they were fighting someone in their ranking, it would only effect them a slot or two or sometimes none at all. After it was all said and done we made our way to the dining hall, to eat dinner. Sara was once again draped around me while I tried to shrug her off, but I was out of booze in the room, I needed to keep her happy to keep me happy. Which was a harder task than liquor tonight, Four or Lana weren't in the room, I scanned all over hoping she was sitting in a different place than usual.

"So what are you going to do to those bitches for fighting us?" Sara asked rubbing her chubby hands down my chest.

"It's been five days, clearly I'm not going to do anything," Five days ago Sara and her body guard had attacked Lana and her candor friend, it had been quite a little treat for the group of us that had been in there to witness, the news had sprung like wild fires after it happened, even Max had asked me about it. "All I can say man, is the sports bras do neither of them justice, but hold what they've got down," I informed Max, feeling a little odd that he had asked.

"Erry," Sara pulled me out of my thoughts.

"How many time's have I told you bitch, don't call me that," I began to stand up when her over exaggerated tears started falling, there went my chance at booze. "God, stop crying," I told her sitting back down, why did I care? She was barley even good enough of a lay to keep around.

"Is there any booze in the kitchen, I'm out?" I asked her when her tears stopped running.

"Yes baby, one bottle," She went off the the kitchen to get it, I really needed to find a new way to get liquor.

* * *

"No, Lana left with Four to get dinner I believe," Megan, a nurse that had put me together more than once, informed me. I knew they weren't at dinner I had waited till everyone was gone to see if they would show. I picked up my bottle and went on my way to my room, steaming. I would get Four back, if I had to shoot him, he was useless to me anyway, just a constant thorn in my side. On the walked I felt sluggish, bloated, from all the meat we had been eating lately, I didn't know if they ran out of produce or were on a meat kick, but it was slowing everyone down, we hadn't seen anything green in almost six days.

On the top step I heard a door slam in the direction of my door, and a sobbing that followed, once I got closer I saw it was Lana, sitting on the floor in between mine and Four's door.

"Was the sex that bad?" I knew she had spent the afternoon with Four, now she was leaving his room. She looked up at me with a crooked smile opening her mouth to reply another sob filled the air and tears bigger than Sara's were running. Her tan skin was unusually pale and her green eyes looked like glass, why was she crying? I'll kill Four if he did anything to her.

Without thinking I reached down pulling her off the floor, for being so tall she was light, almost to light. I pulled us into my apartment I tossed her into my recliner.

"What did he do to you?" I asked ,I felt my face heat in anger, I leaned in with my both of my hands at either side of her head, the only thing keeping me back from pressing my lips to hers.

"Nothing," She sniffled, more tears falling.

Nothing people don't cry for no reason, especially not her.

"Why are you sobbing in the hall outside his door?" I knew she was lying to me.

"I'm starving,"

She was starving?

"I'm starving," She said once more, her stomach rumbled and felt like it shook my whole room, confirming her story. I remained in my position hovering over her. Why was she starving, I knew from the weight of pulling myself up the stairs we had been eating hearty foods, meats of all sorts. Meats! I remembered her puking episode, hadn't that been because she ate meat for the first time.

"Sara," I spoke her name, she had been trying to get back at her for the fight. Tori didn't eat meat either, I remembered her complaining about it from beside me at dinner yesterday, stating she would have to come get some food she had in our fridge soon, she was going to run out of her own. I moved away from Lana and made my way to the kitchen. I pulled out some of everything that didn't have meat, grapes, orange slices, cheese, apples. After nothing else would fit on the plate I brought it back to her, flinging it in her face.

"You haven't eaten in that long?" I asked her sitting down on the couch across the room, twisting the top off my bottle, and looked over at her shoving food in her mouth.

"If I did they would be wining," she spoke in between swallowing and shoving more food in, three or four grapes at a time. She sounded like me, I wouldn't allow Four to have the satisfaction of knowing I couldn't beat him in a fight, I stayed up all nights of the weeks of initiation practicing. She continued shoving food in her mouth.

"You're going to choke," I informed her, there wasn't enough time in between her swallows. She shoved a piece of cheese into her mouth, soon a chunk of banana followed and I felt like clapping my hands together when she started coughing. Why did no one ever listen to me?

"Told you," I offered her my booze bottle, closest thing to water we had in the room. She took a huge couple of swallows before I became alarmed.

"Easy killer, that's all I've got for the night," I informed her pulling the bottle back, before grabbing her plate as well, her growl sounded like pulling food out of an angry lions mouth. "Your stomach has shrunk, you'll make yourself sick." Her nasty smile spread across her face.

"I wasn't done, who knows when I'll eat again, your girlfriend is trying to starve me out," she stared at the plate in my hand, I almost felt bad taking it away but I knew I was right. But I should let her get sick saying Sara was my girlfriend.

"Oh god," I felt my eyes roll, "How many times do I have to tell you she's not my fucking girlfriend, you jealous bitch!" her smile fell and her eyes grew to the size of saucers.

I took her plate out into the kitchen leaving her to stew on my last insult.

"You need a maid," she informed me as I made my way back into the room.

"Well clean, I'll think of a way to pay you," I smirked at her thinking of her in a french maid uniform.

"Somehow I have a feeling my idea of payment and your idea are different," she tried to look insulted, I knew she loved it though.

"Not if you listen to your inner self, that girl I could work with," I rubbed my hand together, thinking of her fighting, the girl that didn't care who was watching her, or where she came from she just was.

"Don't flatter yourself," She huffed at me holding in her laugh.

"I've got someone who does that for me," or offers to, "you couldn't handle this if you tried," I leaned back resting my head on the back of the couch. "You're too Amity,"

A flash filled the room, so fastI didn't realize it was her before before my head hit the wall behind me, her legs wrapped around mine at either side as our lips met she kept her weight on me, preventing me from moving. But somehow the closeness wasn't enough, I dropped the bottle in my hand which fell with a shatter, I needed to put my hands on her. I rested one on her thin hip, the other ran up and down her back under her shirt. The more I tried to move the harder she held me down. I was liking this to much, my inner self screamed at me to insult her one more time, not let her know what she was doing to me. I reached up for her pony tail pulling it to pull our faces apart.

"There is the girl I like so much," No Eric that wasn't an insult.

"I'm no different," her lips looked like they were bruising, I couldn't imagine what mine looked like.

"Yes you are, you're acting like the girl you are, not the damn girl you think you should be,"

"Don't go all sensitive on me now," she smirked pushing my back against the couch.

I had lost track of time trying to push her over onto the couch, every time she slammed me back down, it was the most erotic thing I had ever done with a girl fully clothed, no matter how hard I tried she refused to let me be in charge.

A few minutes later she pulled us apart but I wasn't ready I reached up for her hair again,

"I've got to go, Ali will be looking for me," Ali, who gave a shit if Ali was looking for her, instantly the cold in the room reached my lap, her body missing.

I wasn't sure what I said after that, still in shock from the kiss, until she slipped in the alcohol on the floor and without thought I reached out to grab her. I had forgotten I dropped my bottle, the last of the booze.

"So you made me spill the last of my booze till shipment tomorrow, and now your leaving." why was I asking her to stay? I never let girls stay, especially in their clothes.

"Oh bless your heart," she insulted, " and tell your fucking girlfriend her plan isn't going to work," she reached for the door knob.

"Jealous!" I said in her direction before the door slammed behind her. I couldn't help the smile that rested on my face the rest of the night.

* * *

This was too easy, she was making this way to easy.

While Four yelled out into the transfers room to wake them up I didn't wait a single moment to find her in the dim light, and she was right out in the open, butt up in the air.

I reached out and smacked her thick butt cheek, the sound covered up by the rustling of everyone getting up.

I leaned over by her face, and the familiar scent of fresh flowers and strawberries filled my nose, it was a smell that was strictly Lana.

"GET UP!" I yelled in her ears, tearing the other side of her blankets off her body before walking towards the front, having my fun for the day.

"Are you two coming?" I questioned Lana and Ali after waiting for them by the door, they have had plenty of time to get ready, at least three minutes. The two of them sitting together reminded me of one thing, them sitting together with no clothes on, "Or do you have naked wrestling to tend to?" with that I made my way out the door.

* * *

I walked into the dining hall for dinner after finishing Sims, which took way longer than it was suppose to, these people sucked. The fight with Lana fresh in my mind, I wasn't lying to her when I said she knew more than anyone else, but I wasn't sure what was so special about her, I mean she was outstandingly beautiful, but half of the girls here were, there was something else, something I couldn't put my finger on, like no matter what I told her I knew she would understand.

"Party tonight, you coming?" Sara asked me as I took my seat, I didn't have long to stay, I had an meeting to get to, I noticed the table was still meat.

"Maybe after my meeting," I told her fixing a plate so I could quickly eat, after she told me where It was she leaned in, "Maybe we could have a party after the party," she pushed her tongue against my ear. That always grossed me out.

"Maybe," I swallowed the last of my food, "I've go to go, I'm going to be late,"

* * *

I could hear the party blaring as I walked down the street from where I parked my bike It was in the place the party was at my year of initiation, they tended to move it every year between the same two or three places, not wanting to get caught by uninvited guests. Everything still looked the same as I walked up the red spiral stairs and into the large room the party was being held in. I zoomed right to the booze table, grabbing one in each hand, I was already to far behind my self for the night.

"Hey Eric," Zach stood beside me, reaching for two cups as well.

"Hi, thirsty?" I asked him, it didn't matter that I had two cups, I wanted to know why he did.

"One is for Lana, she's at the poker table right now, she's got like twelve chips to go and she's got them all." Zach laughed, but I couldn't help notice he was checking out the guy beside me pretty strong. Maybe he wasn't after her, it was unbelievable to me that all of us weren't fighting over her, she was unlike anyone else in this room, and now I could add poker star to the list.

"Well I better get back, she'll be yelling she's thirsty soon," he laughed walking over to the poker table. I followed him with my eyes until he got there, her bare back drew my attention right into the gap between her jeans and shirt, blemishless tan skin. Her hair was in light waves down below her shoulder blades and I couldn't help but smile at the red hat hanging on the back of her head barley hanging on as she chugged down the drink Zach handed her throwing her cards down and collected the rest of the chips on the table, before standing up and stumbling away.

"Why are you watching her?" Sara asked from beside me, in an evil tone.

"I'm not," I didn't even move my eyes from her as she flopped down on the floor beside her friend, Zach wasn't far behind.

"Oh bullshit Eric, it's true isn't it?" she shoved me, almost making me spill my drink.

"What?" I finally pulled my eyes away from Lana.

"You're fucking her too aren't you?" she wasn't asking.

"No I'm not," I wasn't lying.

"She's Four's left overs Eric, don't bring yourself down to that baby," she tried to coo me knowing that would piss me off.

"She's alone," he large friend informed her, before grabbing Sara's arm pulling her in Lana's direction. Soon yells filled the room and a small group began to form, I quickly filled into a spot behind Four, I didn't need to help her, she wouldn't need it.

"I've got a news flash for you SYLVIA," I laughed, that would get Sara going, " you or anybody else in this room don't own me, don't tell me what to do!" she continued yelling. I saw her smile as the room began cheering.

"Stay away from him!" Sara told her, pushing her chest. She processed what just happened for a second before she charged in my direction. Pushing my chest and us out of the crowd she kept going until my back hit the wall, her lips and hands all over me. I let her continue until we both needed air.

"Let's get out of here," I grabbed her hand not waiting for a reply, my skin felt hot from all the stares burning holes in it.

My skin immediately cooled as we left the building out onto the street, all the while she assured me that she would not be sleeping with me.

"No shit Sherlock," I insulted her, but kept pulling her in the direction of my bike.

"Who's that?" she questioned.

" It's from a book!" how did she not know who Sherlock Holmes was.

"You're such a nerd," she really had no idea. I let her hand go.

The whole walk to my bike she tried to fight with me about where we were going, but none the less she kept following, until she got in front of my bike.

"Where did you get one of these?" she let her eyes shift over my black bike.

I informed her about how all leaders had a form of transportation, while getting on my bike.

"I'm not getting on that thing," she didn't look scared but she defiantly wasn't sure of herself.

We argued all the way back to the compound once I got her on the bike, and all the way back to my room. I was determined to get her something to eat, her test was tomorrow and I knew she had drank more tonight than she ever had.

"Eat," I handed her a plate of fruit, to which she flipped shit, informing me everybody was trying to tell her what to do and everyone needed to stop, before she ran for the door.

Before I knew what I was doing I grabbed her arm by the door frame.

"Well don't listen to them," I distracted her long enough to take control of the situation and threw her down on the couch before attacking her face with mine.

We continued kissing on the couch for hours, we'd stop for a bit before continuing where we left off, after the fourth of fifth time of starting again I noticed her kisses had become softer, I pulled back to look at her face and noticed she was almost asleep. I quickly carried her to the bed pulling off her boots and slipped her under the blankets before I threw my shirt off and took my place beside her. I quickly fell asleep as well.

* * *

"GET OUT!" I yelled at her back before she finally put my door in between her and my eyes. I couldn't stop tears as they fell. I had let her get to close, she had almost touched them. She would think I was a freak if she knew. About all the tests Erudite had injected into me from a young age, when I didn't show enough promise in school. Years after years tests after test, on my brain, sims, body functions and movement, anything they could think of. I became their human science experiment, all lead by the Paul she had spoken to earlier in the week. How could I explain to anyone what they were, I had never said it out loud. The only person who knew was John and it was just because he grew up with me. My arms felt empty, the arms that were moments ago wrapped around her small frame. I was a fucked up mess.

* * *

"Lana Eversong, Ranked Second, Amity transfer," Four informed the room as she scanned, it looked like she hadn't slept after leaving my room either, dark circles were thick under her eyes.

While she had a small talk with Four he prepared the huge needle for her Fear sim. I couldn't help the queezy feeling I got when he pressed the thick thing into the side of her neck.

Her green eyes met mine before her mind started playing on the screen.

She whipped right through the fears she had been training for, I cringed watching her cook, as cockroaches crawled in her mouth as she screamed and tears filled her eyes when she stabbed her father, but I didn't know how to prepare myself for what happened next.

I was on the screen, talking to Sara about how we were setting her up. Did she really think I would do that? I wanted to run over to her body and tell her otherwise, but I knew none of these things were real. Suddenly her fear changed, she must of calmed herself.

She was standing on the top of the fence, in front of a man with a gun and Alice. While she argued with the man to shoot her instead I took a step forward, but felt a hand on the back of my sleeve, Four was standing behind me, holding me back from making a fool of myself.

When her body fell off the side of the fence my stomach dropped with her, expecting to see her brains splatter on the ground, but the scene changed again.

She was laying on the ground while a little girl tapped her, the girl looked similar to her, but I knew it wasn't. After listening to the two's conversation I knew it was her little sister, Becky. I hadn't even known she had a sister, actually I didn't know anything about her. The little girl was searching for her teddy bear and wanted Lana to follow, this was different than any other fear that I had witnessed, what was she afraid of? Once she got into the box my heart beat a million miles a minute, as she stared down at herself, her small frame was even smaller, covered in her own filth, while the little girl kept asking about her teddy, Lana finally saw it in the corner of the room and pulled it out, handing it to the girl.

Four went up to her as her fears ended. She whispered something to him, her body covered in heavy sweat. Six fears she had six fears, four less than me.

After she left the room Four came up to the computer I stood beside, and spoke so quite I was sure I was the only one that could hear him.

"Second," he said. She was ranked second just like me, she wasn't going anywhere. I knew from now on this girl would be in my life, everyday until my heart stopped beating.

* * *

AN: Thought we'd like to see what Eric had thought of the last couple days.

Also I get asked a lot when Tris is going to show up. If I write her in at all this is going to be the year before her's so it just affects the age difference between her and Four by a year in my warped little world, but i'm not sure where I'm going with this at all. Only thing I know is how it's going to end.

Reviews for updates.

-LANA


	25. Chapter 25

"So what are we going to do today?" Ali asked from the bunk beside me, we didn't wake up till quarter past twelve on our first official day of Dauntless, they allowed us to have a week of freedom before they sent us into the work field.

"Um, I don't know, we could do anything right?" I asked her, rolling over in bed to look at her, I was pretty content with staying in bed all day.

"I think we should get tattoos!" she smiled, she hadn't stopped smiling since yesterday.

"I don't know what I'd get," I looked at her.

"Me either," she laughed!

"Well let's not do that then," I shut my eyes.

"You were in my fear scape," she looked serious for the first time in hours, when I looked back at her.

"You were in mine too," I confessed.

"I had to choose between you and Dauntless," she admitted, after a moment, "I chose you," she smiled again.

"I had to save you from being shot, on top of the fence," I remembered everything, the way my heart beat when I saw the gun, the sound of the click. "I took the bullet instead,"

"Well were stuck with each other for life then," her smile grew, " You can't give up a girl that would take a bullet for you," she swung her legs over the side of the bed. The whole room was empty, we were the last ones up.

"Well lets go see what everyone else is up to,"

It was the first day in weeks that we didn't have to get dressed in workout clothes, or clothes that you were fine getting your ass beat in. It almost felt disappointing the rough denim scratching skin.

The roar from outside the dinning hall gave away where everyone was, still in our usual spot. Nothing in Dauntless was different then yesterday, it was just the eight of us who was different, at some time or another the four Dauntless born had made their way to our table. Zach and Kyle were taking turns throwing cards down, while the rest of the group talked.

"Well if it isn't the walking dead," Zach yelled as Kyle looked up to smirk at the two of us.

"Well, we haven't had a good night sleep for weeks, some of us need beauty sleep," Ali informed the duo as we took our seat across from each other on the bench.

"I was allowed to go see my parents this morning," Zach smiled before reaching on the other side of him and tossing an apple in my direction, even though I was sitting beside him.

"Awe, I could kiss your mom," I took a bite of the crisp apple, but could help scan the room while I did it, no Sara in sight.

"Hey, I brought the apple, lay it on me," he turned his face towards mine, I quickly grabbed his face turning it and pressed a sloppy kiss to his pierced cheek.

"Awe, I'm in love," he yelled out to the crowd, the looks brought a blush over my face. "Rumor has it there is another party tonight," he said to the group in a normal tone.

"What is dauntless just full of parties?" Alex ask, staring at Becky while she quietly ate.

"We never miss the opportunity to have a party, and we are the guests of honor" Lyn, or I think it was, informed me. I had never really paid much attention to her, but now that she was sitting right in front of me I took the chance too. She was short and stocky, with very fair skin, the only bit of color was the freckles on her face and sprinkled over her shoulders,her caramel hair was cut blunt right at the end of bottom of her chin, and her deep brown eyes were larger than a normal persons, which added a look of innocents that her personality didn't possess.

"So they have a party for the people who are about to get kicked out, and a party two days later for the ones that make it?" I spoke to the group.

"Basically,"

"Well that means we'll need an outfit," Ali and the other girls instantly flew up, cheering.

"Oh come on Lana, it's not that bad!" Becky said pulling my arm while I grunted, "Maybe we can get you a new hat," she pulled my red beanie off my head and slapped it on hers, the red yarn clashing with her bright red hair.

"Yeah, or maybe throw it away all together," Kyle yelled to them as they hauled me off behind them.

* * *

"I'm not wearing a dress," I argued with the girls in the clothing store, "No friggen way," I continued to toss down the dresses they kept throwing at me.

"Oh come on," Becky begged, "You're already pooping on our parade,"

"I'll be attending the parade in jeans thank you,"

"At least wear shorts," Lyn added handing me a pair of shorts that looked like a black sequins nightmare.

"Lana, those will look so cute on you!" Ali hysterically bopped around.

"I guess it's the lesser of the two evils," I begrudgingly threw the shorts over my shoulder.

"Now to get you a cute shirt!" they hauled me off in the direction of the shirts grabbing a few before shoving me in the fitting room.

"Bitches," I muttered at I took off my clothes, before slipping on the shorts, the sequins scratched my thighs as I pulled them up. But I hated to admit they didn't look half bad, and at least my lady parts weren't hanging out, everyone had already got enough of a picture of that a couple days ago.

"Put that on too," one of the girls thew a lacy black bra over the top of the door, "No more sports bras, for any of us," I think it was Lyn speaking, we had all been living in them during initiation, we never knew what we were going to be doing.

I stood in the bra and shorts staring in the mirror, I had completely changed over the past couple weeks, every sign of my childhood gone from my body, my face had lost it's baby fat, and my cheek bones stood out high on my face, my shoulders and arms were defined, stronger, my stomach had a hint of a small four pack, it was solid where it used to be soft flab, my hips and thighs were still the biggest thing on me, but somehow it made me look even more womanly.

I tried on the multiple shirts they had thrown into my pile, finally settling on a chiffon shirt that looked like a mens shirts, but was a sheer black materiel, you didn't even notice you were looking at skin until it met the solid fabric of my bra. When I made my way out to the girls to show them they all agreed on my choice, but Ali stepped up to tuck the front half of the shirt, leaving the longer back to hang. After earning everyone's approval I changed back into my normal clothes and carried out my choices with me.

"Now all you need are some hot heels," Becky scanned the shoe shelf.

"Hell no, I'll wear disco ball shorts, but heels and dresses are where I draw the line,"

After arguing for forever, they settled on the fact that I was going to wear my boots no matter what they said. While we waited in the line for our points for the clothes to be deduced I grabbed a knit gray beanie and a thick black one, I would need to at least feel like myself in some way.

Once we were done with clothes the girls decided they wanted to get their hair done, I declined, but said I would set with them, I had always been okay with my hair, it had a natural wave that I usually could control the frizz in, and had been long for as-long as I could remember.

"Look, Mr. Personality is getting his hair done," Becky laughed looking over at a man covered in tattoos from head to toe stood cutting hair, the man literally didn't have an empty hole on any of his showing skin to get a tattoo, that was a whole lot of personality. But then I saw whose hair he was cutting and knew what she was talking about.

"Who would want that haircut?" Lyn stated more as an observation than a question. I didn't mind his hair, I guess I had never really thought about it.

"No, who would want Zach's?" Becky laughed before stylists came to get them, leaving me alone on a padded bench, I took the moment of quiet to shut my eyes and rest my head on the wall behind me.

"You didn't want to get your hair fixed?" Eric jumped me, sitting beside me on the bench.

"What's wrong with my hair?" I frowned at him.

"Nothing, I mean, it's okay," he looked as confused as I felt.

"Okay," I didn't know what else to say, the last real conversation I had with Eric was him throwing me out of his room.

"Getting ready for the party tonight?" he questioned looking down at the girls and my pile of bags.

"I guess so, I don't know why I couldn't just wear what I have on," I looked down at myself, I thought I looked fine.

"Because you've got to put your best foot forward apparently," he didn't seem like he quite understood the clothes thing either.

"What if this is my best foot, they thew away my hat, isn't that enough?" I randomly muttered.

"I liked the hat," he stated before standing, "See you later,"

What did see you later mean? Were we over the whole fight from yesterday? I didn't plan on seeing him later, or ever again if I could help it, all he did was cause problems and piss me off, We'd known each other for a couple weeks and I think that had been our longest conversation without a fight, ever. Sure he was fun to kiss, real fun, but that's all it had been was fun. From now on Eric and I would be two ships passing in the night, and that's all.

* * *

While we stood getting ready in the mirror I couldn't stop my mouth, the conversation from earlier running through my mind.

"What does it mean when a guy says 'see you later?'"" I asked he girls, I didn't think it was a big deal to ask.

"OMG!" all the girls screeched, they seemed to think it was.

"Who was it?"

"What did he look like?"

"Is he going to meet you at the party?"

"Are you two sleeping together?"

All their questions were thrown at me at the same time, "We talked he said see you later, and left, that's all,"

"Well it all depends on the guy, if it's like a nice guy, see you later means I'll be looking for you later. But if it's any other guy, I guess it just mean bye." Becky informed me while the others shrugged.

"Why can't they just say what they mean?" Lyn questioned.

"Because, if they could they would still hit us over the head with a big stick and drag us to their cave," Ali joked as the rest of us laughed and continued to get ready.

When we were on our way out the door after we were all ready I grabbed my gray beanie off my bed and slapped it off my head before they had a chance to object.

"Oh, lover girls got her hat on," Lyn laughed as we ran out the back door to the train tracks to meet the boys.

They all were in jeans and t-shirts.

"See, I would have been fine in what I was wearing!" I informed everyone.

"Why wear jeans when you could have the potential chance to blind a poor soul," Zach laughed moving in all directions as the street lights lit up my shorts.

"Get on the train," I began running not waiting for him as the train whizzed past.

"Lets dance!" Ali yelled grabbing my arms, before I could get my way over to the poker table.

"I don't know how," my stomach dropped with just the thought of it.

"Just move, and whatever you do, don't think about it," she pulled me out onto the full dance floor.

After I made a fool of myself several times I got a hang of the whole controlled idiot dancing.

I finally got so thirsty from all the dancing I couldn't take it anymore, "I'm going to get a drink, do you want anything?" I yelled over to Ali who was dancing with some random man.

"Nope, I'm about to go find Kyle," she smiled but continued dancing with the boy.

I went over to the table filled with cups and began peeking inside each one, trying to figure out what they contained.

"What are you sampling each one?" Eric yelled over the music, all of a sudden beside me.

"No, sniffing them," I informed him smiling.

"Why?" his eyebrow ring shined in the light as it raised.

"Why are you bothering me?" I questioned as I began inspecting the cups again.

"I don't know, I was drawn in by the shorts," he smirked down at them.

"What can I say, I'm the spokes girl for peer pressure," I kept looking the drinks over.

"Here," he handed me one of the cups towards the back, as he grabbed two for himself.

"What a lush you are," I threw back the drink, while he drank both of his cups.

"Well, you're one to talk,"

"You never answered why you are bothering me,"

"I'm not sure,"

An alarm went off before I had a a chance to reply and water began pouring down on the whole room.

The room filled with cheers as everyone began dancing, the music somehow got louder.

"Dance with me," Eric whispered in my ear pulling me close. Without thought I looked around to see who was watching us.

"No one is looking, I promise," he grabbed my hips pulling me around to the music.

"Don't make promises you can't keep,"

"You're taking all the fun away from it," we continued dancing, grinding against each other, the music banged in every part of my body, but my mind was on how close our bodies were.

"Everyone will be talking about this," I confirmed as I noticed eyes on us.

"Well lets give them something to talk about," he didn't wait for a response as he picked me off the ground and wrapped my legs around his hips, our mouth slamming together in it's usual form.

After what seemed like decades the music ended and we pulled apart as my feet landed in ankle deep water.

"We've flooded the place, lets get out of here, before Max shows up," A random guy yelled and a crowd began filing down the stairs.

"Come with me," Eric was standing behind me but no longer touching me.

"I can't," I hadn't realized how much the water had been running till we stopped kissing. My hair was sopping wet, along with my beanie.

"What the fuck ever," he snapped slamming back into the crowd putting distance between us.

* * *

AN- I don't own anything divergent related. How is everyone feeling about this story? Also every time I add a significant character into my story I add a picture of how I think they should look on my Polyvore set. Link in my profile.

Review for updates.

-LANA


	26. Chapter 26

"I've been thinking," Ali and I were once again laying in our beds after noon.

"Oh lord, about what?" I couldn't help but laugh,these were the first words we'd spoken to each other today, she didn't waste any time.

"We need to find your grandfather soon, while we have free time," no emotion was on her face. She did have a point though, who knew what we would be thrown into next week.

"How are we going to go about that?" I asked her, hoping she had a plan.

"We may have a little pull with a certain number in the control room,"

"Four!" I sat straight up in bed.

"Ding, Ding, Ding," she rang out sitting up as well. We quickly dressed ourselves before beginning our journey.

"What are we going to just walk up and ask him?" I asked her, she was the captain of this ship.

"I'm thinking so," She just shrugged her shoulders, like it would that easy.

"Can we at least take the stairs this time?" I questioned remembering us climbing the wall last time.

"Well where is the fun in that?" her devious eyes lit up but she lead the way to the stairs anyways.

After the third landing we were both gasping for breath.

"Would an elevator kill them?" I asked her breathing deep.

"That would be to easy, nothing here is easy," I knew she would have laughed if she had the breath to do so.

I felt like kissing the rock ground as we made it to the very top level.

"Good lord, I didn't think we'd make it," she gasped.

"I knew we would, I didn't have what it took to go back down,"

"I hadn't thought about that,"

After we could breathe again we made our way down to the control room.

"I hope he's in here," We hadn't thought about that.

Relief filled my chest as we filled the door way of the room and saw him sitting there with his feet up.

"Took you two long enough," he turned to look at us.

"How did you know we were coming?" I asked, did he know what we were coming for?

"I watched," He pointed at a screen that showed who was on the stairs.

"Oh, well you could of come half way down and met us," Ali joked with him, sitting on the edge of a table, "We need your help," she really didn't waste anytime.

"With what exactly?" he didn't look at us while he clicked around on the screens moving pictures around.

"We need to locate someone," I took a seat beside him.

"Who?"

"Um, Brian Lodgner, he is in Dauntless somewhere," I nervously rubbed my hand together.

"Why?" I didn't know what to say.

"Look Four, we can't explain it now, can you help us or not?" Ali stood up raising her voice.

Four stared at us for a couple minutes, probably trying to figure out if he trusted us to help without information or not.

"Please," I smiled at him my heart was beating faster than ever before.

He turned back to the computer screen and began clicking around.

"I guess not," Ali muttered disappointed making her way to the door, as I began following.

"I thought you wanted help," Four spoke after an eternity, "He's right here," he pointed at the screen as an older man filled it, handing out guns as guards passed.

"How did you find him that fast?" Ali asked as I continued watching the screen, a chill ran down my spine, I had seen this man before.

"He works in the gun cabinet, you have to check everything out past him," simple enough.

"Thanks Four," Ali yelled back to him, I hadn't even realized I had began walking out the door, where was I going?

"Wait, one more thing Four," I smiled in his direction as he raised his eyebrows, "Where is the gun cabinet," he just laughed as he gave us directions.

"Are you ready for this?" Ali asked while we stood outside the door to the gun cabinet, apparently it was just a name for the room that contained guns. "You might hear some things you don't want to know," Ali reached her hand out to rest on my shoulder.

"I rather know I asked then never do it at all," my legs shook as we walked up to the front of the room, from inside you could see why they called it a cabinet, the whole room was wrapped in metal, metal tables, metal lined walls, metal guns, surprise even the floors were metal.

"Cabinet," Ali laughed, " I get it now," I took a deep breath, I was glad I had brought her.

I didn't know what I had expected would happen, it was so easy to find him, all you had to do was ask. I figured I would have to search everywhere, leave no stone unturned, and he was six left turns away. Would he know who I was?

He stood at the front of the room, he was tall and lean, like a guy that had been in Dauntless for years should look. Ali nodded her head in the direction of the desk he was standing behind.

"Now or never, " I muttered to myself taking my steps forwards.

"Are you Brian Lodgner?" I asked when I was in ear shot.

"Yes Alana, I was wondering when you'd show up," he didn't miss a beat.

"Then you're..."

"I'm your grandfather, yes. I've been waiting on you for a long time," I didn't know what to do, but I felt like crying and wrapping myself around the man I had never met, but I controlled myself. "How's your mother? Still crazy as ever?"

"Um, last time I saw her yes," I had a flash back to her yelling to me through the closet door on visiting day.

"I don't know what happened to her, she was a perfect Dauntless, until one day a group of teens from all factions were sent out to help Amity with crops after a huge snow storm and she was never the same, instantly she was in love with your idiot of a father," he took a moment to collect his thoughts, "And they always said Erudite were suppose to be smart, I could tell the moment I saw his eyes that he was off his rocker, months after her choosing ceremony you were born and I knew she would never have a chance to get away from him."

"You kept up with her?" I questioned, how did he know so much if he was in Dauntless.

"I worked at the fence at that time, you work for three weeks at a time, there is nothing better to do than trade information with the other factions,"

"Is that how you knew I would come here?" I questioned, not sure where this information was getting me.

Brian stopped talking checking out more guns to some guards that came through.

" After you came here last year, I saw Dauntless in your eyes," he smiled at me like I was his most prized possession.

"I don't remember being here, at all." I looked him in the eyes, my mom's green eyes, my green eyes.

" She got to you then," he must of thought that would be enough information.

"Who?" I didn't have time for cryptic conversation.

" Your bitch of an aunt, the only person I've seen crazier than your father," he checked out another gun.

"Jeanine?" I didn't need to ask I knew who he was talking about.

"She was looking for you when you left, you showed up here and left with your grandmother,"

"Catherine?"

"Yes, my wife, she's factionless now, your aunt has her claws in more than the Amity."

"Then it's my fault, that she's gone," I felt tears weld up for a woman I had never met. A woman who had helped me run from whatever I was hiding from.

"What was I running from?" I asked needing to know, I needed to remember.

" Not what Lana, but who. Cat she was the love of my life, but the moment she saw that look on her face she knew what she had to do, she had to help you, she wanted nothing more," his wrinkled hand reached out to wipe the tears from my face.

"Who?" he knew what I meant.

"If you need to ask, you're no ready to know,"

Brian didn't provide any more answers as the room began filling with guards changing shifts. I was angry as I left, I hadn't really got any answers, just more questions.

"Well, he was no help," Ali finally spoke when we were in the hall. She took the words right out of my mouth.

"No one seems to be," I felt more tears weld up, "I'm going to go, think. I'll meet up with you later," I didn't want to cry with company.

"Are you going to be okay?" She grabbed my hand squeezing.

"I think so," I walked off not thinking about where I was going, just let my legs lead the way.

I ended up at his door, I didn't hear anyone inside laughing which was a positive. I didn't know why I came here, I shouldn't have, but that didn't seem to matter as my knuckles hit the door. After a couple of seconds he hadn't answered the door and I turned to leave.

"Lana?" his voice followed me down the hall, I turned to see him standing in a white towel and I couldn't stop the tears.

"I shouldn't have come here," I turned back around to leave as he grabbed my hand, pulling me into his apartment.

"Well, that's the first time a girl has cried when seeing me in a towel," he tried to make a joke but more tears fell as I put on a fake smile.

"I'll be right back," I heard him head towards his bedroom but I didn't follow him with my glazed eyes. Tears continued to fall as I sniffled listening to him come back out and open the ice box.

"Here, we are still having all you can eat meat," he put a plate on my lap as he sat down on the couch across from me, even through my tears I saw he was shirtless, just a black pair of sweat pants rested on his hips. I began picking at the plate, my tears subsided as I focused in on something else. Eric didn't say anything.

"Thanks," I took a small bite of the bread on the plate. I couldn't help but notice it was new food than last time.

"For what?" he asked reaching around to the end of the couch picking up a bottle I hadn't noticed.

"For being nice," he snorted when I said the words, I even joined in after a moment.

"My god, something really is wrong with you, to say that," he laughed. I liked the sound of his laugh, it was different than a public laugh, it was more of a wheeze than anything else.

I felt my smile get bigger as he continued.

" I think I'm still drunk from last night," he stopped laughing. I had forgotten about what had happened in the events of today. How pissed he was as I turned him down.

"Yeah," was his only reply.

"Eric, I don't know how to do this," I decided to be honest. How could I deny what I felt, every second of the day he ran through my head, whenever I was sad he seemed to be there, like he knew where I was going to be before I got there. But I knew he didn't feel the same way, he was a baggem, or at least that's what everyone told me. With everything going on he was the last kind of distraction I needed.

"Like I do Lana," he snapped standing up.

"What is this even?" I stood up as well, I knew a fight was right around the corner.

" I don't fucking know Lana, I don't know anything about what the fuck this is, all I know it you are in my head 24/7. I see you cry and feel like doing it myself, I wait to see you in the morning, sitting with you friends, watching you smile, when you show up where I'm at I get excited not creeped out, when I thought you were with Four I lost my shit, when you left that morning I instantly regretted it,"What he was saying should be sweet but the way he was yelling it made it anything but.

"Well let me do you a fucking favor then," I yelled at him louder than I ever had, " You're the one who kicked me out Eric," I said his name with all the venom I could collect, "You piss me off more than anyone else ever has, and if what I've seen in my sims, if those are true,that is saying something," his posture changed, he slouched.

"You think those are real?"

"I don't know, I think so," I let my shoulders drop as well. " I've got the scars, from my dad," I refused to cry again, " I think my last fear, my worst one, with my sister. I don't think I was afraid of seeing myself die, or the guilt of leaving my sister, I think I truly afraid of the truth," I didn't know why I was admitting this to him, I hadn't even admitted it to myself yet. " It pulled me out before I was ready, I didn't know giving her the bear would do that,"

"Well go back in," he said it like it was such a reachable thing.

"How?" I asked, we had completely stopped yelling.

"I'll bring you back, I'll go with you,"

* * *

AN- Another update? Someone give me a dang award. Some Eric with a touch of fluffiness, that's got to at least earn me a cookie.

I've got so many ideas running through my head I don't know whats what anymore. All I know is I don't own anything Divergent like.

Reviews?

-LANA


	27. Chapter 27

"Eric are you sure we should be doing this?" I asked him after we plain as day walked through the pit into the sim room.

"Yes," he didn't seem to think anything of it.

"What if we get caught?" I asked when he walked over turning on the computer.

"Who is going to catch us Lana? I'm the one..."

"I know you're in charge," I rolled my eyes, "You've told me a million times, I hope the record breaks soon,"

"Jealous, you're so damn jealous," he smirked at me before picking up a needle filling it with the serum.

"Are you okay?" I remembered his face when Four had stuck me with a needle, I knew that was what his scars were from. We sat side by side on the chair, both of our legs stretched out.

"I will be," he reached up sticking a monitor to my temple and another to his. He picked up the needle on the side table and pressed it into my neck, even though it stung I refused to let him see, I needed to not wince, for him.

He shut his eyes as he stuck the rest of the serum into his neck.

"It's okay," I assured him as he sat the needle down and we were sucked into my mind.

I was on the chair alone in the field, I panicked. Where was he? He was suppose to come with me.

"Eric?!" I yelled out into the field.

"Behind you," he was standing in the field behind me, he looked just like he had in the room moments ago, nothing had changed.

"Just do what you always do Lana, I'm not going to leave you, take your time on the important ones, your not being timed," he tilted his head towards the brick wall, he had watched me do this one before.

We walked up to the wall, already feeling the heat, I quickly turned knowing the other walls would fall down. When I began to walk to the middle after the four walls fell the roof came down to top it off, the heat rose.

" Damn it's hot in here," he spoke pulling the collar of his shirt back to be his usual dramatic self. I would have laughed if I wasn't in the middle of being cooked.

"Yeah," my heart was beating out of my chest, I was sure he could see where it pumped. Soon the flames roared to life.

"What is that smell?" he questioned, standing in the middle of the fire.

"Burning flesh," I knew what I had to do but my knees wouldn't bend. After a couple more seconds of terror I felt Eric's rough hand on my arm, as he pulled me down into his chest in the flames.

"You're okay," the flames scorched up higher, he started rubbing his hands up and down my back, "Calm down Lana, you're okay," he kept repeating the words to me, and soon the flames died down and the place went black.

I knew what would happen next and I was already gasping for breath, Eric's hand continued rubbing the pattern down my back, soon little tiny feet began running all over my body, millions of them, on my face, in my ears, all over my body. I began weeping, the feeling of them making me want to gag.

"Shh, shh," Eric was still there, holding me in the dark while cockroaches ran over him too. I concentrated on the pattern his hands rubbed, the calluses leaving a goosebumps. I would of thanked him for the distraction if I hadn't had previous knowledge that if I opened my mouth cockroaches would start running out.

After a few more moments the panic left my body and the scene changed.

"That was disgusting, he informed me while we stood up in Amity fields.

"You're not telling me anything I don't know,"

"Alana you've come back," My father filled the space in between me and Eric. I froze, why did every time I see my father I freeze.  
"No she hasn't," My father fell over, blood splattered on the back of his head as Eric stood behind him holding a huge rock, which was also covered in blood.

"Eric!" I snapped, not being able to control my laugh.

"What? I wasn't going to let him beat you with me standing here," he shrugged dropping the rock before the view changed again.

Sara popped out of the hole in the rock, and I knew Eric wouldn't be far behind.

"So this is what I look like to you," Eric came up from behind me, and I think he shocked us both when he pressed his lips to my throat, as the other Eric answered Sara's question.

"Let your six fears turn into five," he pulled his lips away. "This would never happen, I don't have a drink." As a laugh left my mouth we quickly changed locations again.

"Lets not do this either," He said when he saw we were onto of the fence, he grabbed my hand before he pulled us both of the end.

We were back in Amity, his hand still in mine as small hands began hitting my back.

"Lana," I didn't reply, this is the fear I had been waiting for, "Lana," small hands slapped me, I looked up at my sister's toddler form. But I still had a hold of Eric's hand.

"Lanny, I need you're help," She grabbed my other hand, pulling me off the ground.

"She doesn't see you?" I asked as Eric got up with me.

"No, once the sim knows how your going to react it doesn't change it's just a scene that runs over and over again."

" I've lost my teddy, Charlie, do you remember him?" She answered a question I hadn't asked. I watched her do it a few more times, she began dragging me up the hill, holding an invisible hand. One of mine were in Eric's the other in my pocket.

She continued to talk, telling me about the box and how I had Charlie.

"So the sim never changes?"

"Not unless you change it, she should answer new questions, you either overcome it, or it haunts you forever," he was looking the fields all over. "It will always end when you give her the teddy," he sounded stupid saying teddy.

When we got up to the box I wasted no time opening it, the smell filling the air, but Eric didn't mention it. Tears still filled my eyes seeing myself in the middle of the box. It wasn't about me, it was about getting answers from Becky.

"Becky?" I turned to look at her standing in the door, "Who put me in here?"

"Daddy, Lana, do you see Charlie?"

"What did they do to me Becks, before they put me in the box?"

"They gave you shots, mommy said to make you better, can you reach Charlie?"

"Who gave me shots?"

"Our auntie, and her friends. Is Charlie okay?" I looked over at her in the door, her little eyes look like they were on fire.

"Why? Why did they do this?"

"Because you left us Lanny, you always were bad, but you were getting worse. You went to see grandpa, then grandma brought you back. Where is CHARLIE!" she yelled as her eyes turned black, she looked like a little demon girl.

Her story went along with Brian's. It was real everything was real. I turned back to my body in the middle of the room. The smell, the way I looked. It had really happened. I noticed in the corner opposite of Charlie had apple cores and other sort of food wrappers. At least they were feeding me, soon a cockroach ran in the corner, and the heat hit me, it all fit together. Eric was standing over my form in the middle, staring down.

"It's real, it's all real," I cried out, I couldn't breathe.

"What,"

"This happened to me," I struggled to talk.

"CHARLIE!" Becky yelled from the door, her form had crippled and her skin began shriveling up. I'd been here to long, her bones began growing out of her body.

"Eric, I can't breathe," I laid down beside myself on the box floor, I was flipping out. I forgot how to breath. I could only see the shadow of Eric as he threw the bear at my sister, and the smell instantly left my nostrils.

I still couldn't breathe.

Eric didn't say anything as he pulled the monitors from our heads listening to me gasp for breath he did exactly what I wanted him to, he pulled me into my chest and held me as I cried. It wasn't a dream or a sim, we weren't drunk or fighting for dominance, we were just a boy and a girl holding onto each other for dear life.

It must have been an hour later and we were still laying together, my breathing only moments ago returned to normal and my tears dried.

"Your sister is scary," I laughed. I was so happy to laugh I could of cried again.

"Well, your girlfriend is ugly," I lightly slapped his chest.

"She's got big tits though," he laughed back.

"I've got to get up, my legs are asleep," I pulled us apart, breaking my own heart.

"I'm glad you only had six fears, yours are more creepy than scary," he sat on the edge of the seat as I stood to stretch my legs.

"Doesn't everyone have six fears?" I thought everyone went through the same number of fears.

"No, it's selective to the person." he stopped to think before he spoke again, "How do you think Four got his name?"

I hadn't thought about it.

"Um, I thought he was ranked forth,"

"No, he had Four fears," he finally stood up.

"So I'm six?" I asked imagining people calling me that.

"I mean if that's what you want," his eyebrows rose.

"So that makes you.." I waited for an answer.

"Eric,"

"Funny, Funny," I smiled at him.

"Let's get out of here," he went over to the computers shutting them down.

"Can you believe we haven't fought yet?" I asked when we left the room.

"We are good at it, you've got to admit," he smiled back.

"Where do we go from here?" I asked, meaning us.

"Well I could take you back to your room, or you could come to mine." Boys were so dumb.

"I plan on sleeping till noon, so take me to mine." I felt just as disappointed as he look when we reached my door.

"Well, thanks for that," I looked down at our boots.

"Yeah, I would of done it for anyone," he looked down too.

"Keep telling yourself that," I pulled his head up, pressing my lips to his cheek.

"That's all I get for all that shit?" he smirked.

"There is that guy I like so much," I remember what he has said about that real me.

"What kind of guy is that?" he asked keeping his smirk.

"An asshole who drinks himself to death every night,"

"I've got just the guy in mind," he pushed me against the wall kissing me in the less romantic way he could before slapping my butt and strolling down the hall.

"You're such a dick," I yelled down to him before going into my room.

* * *

AN: What could be fluffier than this? It's probably to much, but I made it happen. So are they together now? Would it be that easy?

Review for updates.

-LANA


	28. Chapter 28

"Lana, what is wrong? You've been acting strange lately." Ali asked me as we sat eating at lunch, both of us. Somehow stuff other than meat showed up at all meals. The first day it happened I wanted to stand on the table and dance, but thought better of it as I cut into the food, looking for mold or worms. Nothing. "Is it what your grandfather said?"

I nodded my head instantly feeling bad for lying. The thoughts of talking with my grandfather had left my mind. But she was right I had been acting odd lately. I hadn't talked to Eric in two days, but I had seen him everywhere. Eating breakfast with Sara, while she rubbed his chest. Walking in the hall with her. Eating Lunch while she whispered in his ear. When we went to harass Four in the control room the day after Eric went through my fears with me I could hear Eric and Sara in his office, the sounds of their moans made me sick. That night normal food was back.

"Or lack of what he said," I took a bite of my pile of lettuce, I would never complain about plain lettuce again.

"Well, we can't give up," she smiled trying to cheer me up, it was no use.

I heard a shriek of 'ERRY' in he background and didn't need to turn to know what I would see. Ali's face fell when she saw I wasn't buying in to it, the look on her face made me regret how I was acting. I had lived sixteen years without Eric, why was I acting like I needed him to breathe all of a sudden. I got into Dauntless all by myself, I didn't need him to survive here. I had a friend, a friend who was begging me for attention. I was Dauntless damn it, and it was time I started acting like it.

"We'll have to start at square one," I smiled at her, glad I had given myself the pep talk, the look on her face made it worth it.

"I really want a tattoo in the mean time," she smiled, everyday she had asked me about getting one.

"Well I've been thinking about a piercing," I thought back to a guy at the poker table, I didn't realize it at the time, but I had loved his piercing on the middle piece of his nose, after the party I began noticing it everywhere we went, I just had been to caught up in myself to notice.

"Well, what are we waiting for?"When we stood up to go to the door Eric and Sara came into view, and I didn't turn trying to hide that I had saw like usual, I looked him dead in the gray eyes before lifting my head and walking past.

"I want a piercing here," I pointed at the guys nose, he also had the piercing I wanted.

"A septum?" he questioned.

"Exactly," I didn't know if that was the right name or not. He lead me over to a chair like the sim chair and motioned for me to take a seat.

"I'm Lennon by the way," I finally looked him over, he was covered in tattoos , not an empty space.

"Do you spot light as a hairdresser?" I remembered seeing him while the girls got their hair done.

"I spot light as many things, I thought I had seen you before, you were talking to Eric right," he opened a fresh needle.

"Who?" I wasn't here to think about him again.

Lennon didn't reply.

"Ready?" he held an odd pair of tweezers around the spot in my nose, " Breathe in, than out," As I let my breath out I felt the needle push into the skin between my nostrils. While he wiggled the needle around water formed in the corners of my eyes.

"Everyone's eyes water, don't worry," his deep brown eyes looked into mine, the water running.

"What are you doing to this poor girl," why was he here? If an needle wasn't sticking out of my nose I would have ran.

"Nothing she can't handle, this is a tough bitch, I've seen full grown men squirm at this," Lennon smiled down at me, I continued to watch his eyes, refusing to look in Eric's direction.

"If you say so," he spoke back.

"Oh go to hell," I felt my body tense.

"I like her," Lennon pulled the needle back as he adjusted the piercing.

"Well mark that on the list Lana, someone likes you," he snapped angry about me telling him off in front of Lennon.

"One more thing I'm better at than you," He stormed off.

"I bet you two have hot sex," Lennon finally stood up reaching for a mirror.

"What?" I would have wrinkled my face if I didn't have a foreign object hanging out of it.

"Eric doesn't talk to girls he's not sleeping with," he shrugged showing me the mirror.

A little purple horse shoe was hanging out of my nose, right where I wanted it.

"I love it," I smiled at him, reaching up to adjust it for myself as he riddled off care instructions for it.

After he was sure I wasn't going to pass out when I stood he let me leave.

Ali was standing in the waiting room.

"You're already done?" I questioned while I came up to her.

"Yup, what I got was real small," she smiled while she looked my piercing over. "I like, let's go see what everyone else is doing,"

We were going stir crazy, after going from being exhausted day after day, to doing nothing at all was killing us.

"We could go shopping," Lyn offered to the group.

"No." the boys and I argued.

"We could go see what's happening in the pit,"

"No," everyone replied to Becky.

"Get something to eat,"

"We just ate," Zach rubbed his stomach.

I noticed something move in the door of the dorm room, for a minute I thought it was Four, but I saw sadly mistaken when I saw the sleeve of his jacket. I tried to ignore him but his arm kept waving me forward.

"I'm going to the bath room, I'll be back," I didn't wait for a comment as I followed his arm towards the door.

He was flailing his arms in the hall, he grabbed my arm and began dragging me.

"Where are we going?" he didn't answer, "Eric," I tried to pull my arm from his grasp, he didn't let it go, "I can walk on my own, I'm an adult," he finally let go of my arm, but still didn't say anything, finally we made it to an empty room near the dining hall.

"What is your problem?" I asked when he shut the door behind us.

"I'm not the one with a problem, I've been doing some research," he looked me up and down.

"What inside Sara?" I snapped.

"Feisty, I like that," he smirked. I wanted to slap the look of his face, " I went in your file in the control room, you know the one you broke into, and I saw you're grandmother, she was kicked out of Dauntless, so I looked it up, she was kicked out for kidnapping,"

"Kidnapping?" I questioned not getting where he was going with this.

"Yes, she had you, but she didn't kidnap you, I watched the security cameras from that year, the day she left. It was definitely you, but you came here to her," he stopped to stared at me, "Why did you come here?" he asked.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. I had never seen the dauntless compound until I jumped.

"What do you mean you don't know Lana?" he reached up to pinch his nose between his eyes.

"I mean I have never been here before I jumped two weeks ago,"

"Why are you lying?" he almost looked upset, "Do you really think that poorly of me?" he actually was hurt.

"I'm not, I don't remember, I don't remember anything about any of this," I yelled at him, what would I get from lying?

"Why won't you let me in?" For a minute I thought I saw tears build in his eyes but as he blinked they were gone.

"Eric, I'm telling you, I don't remember leaving, being in the box dying, Jeanine coming to Amity,"

"Jeanine?" he questioned.

"Yes, apparently she's my evil aunt,"

"So he really is your grandfather," he said more to himself than me.

"Who? Paul, that old guy, yeah," his eyes grew in size.

"Nothing," the anger that always lingered when I was around Eric made it's way up my chest.

"So I'm suppose to trust you, but you don't trust me," I turned to the door,

"He.." he stopped and swallowed, and looked me in the eyes, I saw his inner struggle to tell me whatever it was, "He used to be the guy in charge of my tests," he pulled out the collar of his shirts showing me the scars I had come so close to touching.

"What tests?" I allowed myself to look at his scars, before he dropped his collar.

"It's complicated," I had seen a lot of emotions on Eric's face before, but nervous was never one of them.

"What about any of this isn't?" I wasn't sure if he was talking about us or his situation.

"I don't know how to do this Lana, I don't let people in," he ran his hands through his hair, "I don't know who I even am anymore when you're around,"

"I didn't ask you to Eric, this would never work between us, I don't trust you, and you can't stop sleeping with Sara, or anyone else at that."

"You don't even know me Lana, you only know what you've heard about me,"

"I don't know what to say Eric, you're living up to it, I heard you two the other day I was in the control room with Four," he was speechless.

"I can't change overnight," he shrugged.

"I don't want to change you," I paused, "I like who you are, the asshole Eric who can't stand not being in charge, but I hate the stuff he does,"

"Well what do you want Lana?" he leaned in closer.

His dry lips were right there, begging to touch mine.

"You'll do for today," I pushed us together.

We stood there kissing and touching until we got tired of standing and Eric pulled us on the floor with his legs straight on and me sitting on his lap with my legs one either side, it had become our signature move.

Eric pulled us apart for a moment to grab a breath before we both leaned in at the same time, our nose slapping.

"oww," I reached up to my new piercing," Did you just head butt me?" I looked down at him, matching his smile.

"You're the head butter," he kissed the tip of my nose.

"You didn't just do that," I joked with him.

"See I told you, I don't know what's happening with me,"


	29. Chapter 29

"Oh you never gave me a thank you," Eric yelled to me before I left the room.

"For what?" I turned to look at him, he was still sitting on the floor.

"The best make out session of your life," he smirked.

"mm, it was probably 3rd place, Four is much better," I smirked back

"You'll take that back," he stood up slowly after sitting in the same place for two hours.

"I don't have time to start this again, I'm hungry,"

"You could thank me for that too," he put his jacket on that he had lost about an hour ago.

"For me being hungry?" I felt my face distort in confusion.

"Well for that too," I hated his smirk, "But for more than meat dinner,"

I felt my eyebrow raise, "I don't even want to know what you had to do to get that done,"

"You really don't," he tried to make it a joke, but he was the only one that's laughing.

"That's real cute," I could have puked thinking about it.

"Oh here we go, storm off again," he looked at me like I was a five, there was that anger again.

"You don't get to do that Eric, I'm not some slut that's going to make out with you at parties, or in some closet," I pointed at the room we were in. "And I'm the one that has to put up with your shit,"

He looked flabbergasted, like I had just shown him light for the first time and he didn't know if it was a good thing or not.

"I'm using Sara, not you," Did he think that would fit anything?

"Oh well let me thank you Eric," I spewed at him sarcastically.

"Don't do this," he did the thing.

"Don't do what? Tell you how I feel?"

"Why are we doing this? Why do I even give a fuck?" He pulled his fist back and hit the rock wall, a familiar crack of fingers filled the room.

"Well I don't give one anymore," I turned to leave.

"Don't," his bloody hand reached out and grabbed mine, I could feel myself shaking, but I wasn't sure if it was anger or silent tears anymore.

His eyes looked so serious.

"What are we doing Eric?" I questioned out loud after asking myself a million time.

"I won't see Sara anymore," he acted like it was a promise.

"Oh good, so she can really kill me,"

* * *

Eric seemed to be true to his word the next day, he began eating at the leaders table, while Sara stared bullets at me, from the table behind Ali. Had he said something to her? We still hadn't got anywhere, so we liked to kiss each other, and bicker, but our real fights were lethal; we were like a tornado and a hurricane bouncing off each other, given the chance we could cause destruction for anything around us. That should probably be the first warning that we would never work, but I couldn't help the smirk I sent in Ali's direction with my all knowing eyes.

"New member's of Dauntless, stay after breakfast." Max spoke loud enough for the whole dining hall to hear, even though all the people he was talking to all sat at the same table.

"Do you think he's finally assigning us jobs?" Becky's eyes lit up.

"Do they just tell us what we are going to do? Or do we just get a choice?"

"I'm not sure, I've never asked," Becky shrugged. I guess we'd find out.

After the final few people left the room Max, Four and Eric made there way over to the table, I noticed Eric's scarred up hands and the way he swayed like he could fall asleep at any moment.

"We really want you to take the job placement serious, you are here for **life.**" Max looked so serious when he spoke, "We are giving you one more chance to try out what you ranked in to do,"

Max went through us one by one, giving us two choices of things to try.

"Lana since you were second, you could either go out to the fence and learn how to run it, or you could learn security stuff for the control room, remember tomorrow you will have to make your choice for good." I knew what I'd pick before I heard the second choice.

"Fence,"

* * *

"MY BABY!" John yelled once I jumped off the train. I felt his contagious smile spread on my face, everything about John made me happy, he was my female Ali. "You made it, you're Dauntless,"

"Why did everyone doubt that I would?"

"I didn't, not for a minute honey," he held my hand as we went up to his office in the fence. "So what have you been up to?" I almost choked on my words as I told him everything that happened over the last few days, my grandparents, my fear sims, Sara starving me, and everything between Eric and I.

John would add comments to my story while I told them.

"Why didn't you ask Tori for some food?" he asked when he learned about me being starved. "He went into your sims with you?" I nodded in reply finishing on with my story.

"The shorts didn't sound that bad," I even told him about how strange Eric was walking this morning. "If he pissed her off then he probably didn't have anything to drink,"

Once I finished everything he leaned back in his seat like he was thinking.

"Soo, where does that leave you two? If he told her what's what,"

"That's the million dollar question, I don't even know how I feel about him besides annoyed."

"I'm annoyed by Tori all the time, but that's what keeps me coming back, the unknown."

"Well just because he says he's done with Sara doesn't mean he's not going to find a different girl," he twisted his mouth up.

"Eric usually doesn't say things he doesn't mean, he's honest because he doesn't care whose feelings he hurts, so if he's putting any effort into whatever you two are doing, he means it,"

"What about Sara, she believes they are together, he must have allowed her to believe it,"

"I've been around since before Sara, she's always known he used her for alcohol, but she is like all the others, she thinks she's going to tame the beast, fixed him and he'll be the perfect guy because she trained him that way, she's not like you,"

I took a moment to process what he'd said, I wouldn't change a hair on his head, except for her.

"How do you know I'm any different?" I questioned him.

"Because, if it's at all possible, you are even more messed up than him," he smiled at me.

He was right, my favorite traits of Eric were his less desirable ones. I liked the way he fought with me, and how he was always in competition with Four, or how he anything he did he put all he had into it, I even found it humorous how much he drank.

"So what do you do out here for three weeks?" I hadn't even seen him lift a paper.

"Well my lady, allow me to show you,"

* * *

I still felt upset when I got back to the compound after leaving John, but I was glad to get some things sorted out in my head.

"There she is," a hand wrapped around my mouth as someone picked me up off the ground, Sara came into my sight but a hand remained over my mouth, someone strong.

"Well if it isn't the new Dauntless slut, just get back from wrecking someone else's life?"

I fought against the hand to reply.

"But you will be just a memory in his life once you go missing," she cryptically spoke, as whoever had me carried me along behind her down the hall.

We reached the bright kitchen as the swinging doors hit the bottom of my feet.

"You should of stayed worried about not eating meat and minded your own business and kept away from Eric," I tried my hardest to look around, my screams against the hand over my mouth didn't go anywhere. I caught a reflection of myself in the bottom of a pan, and who was carrying me.

Alex?

"I've had this plan to cook you since Britney told me about it, but I never had the help I needed. But I wasn't the only one you have burned here," she walked behind me, "Isn't that right Alex," I could see in the pan that she rubbed his chest like she did Eric's, " I saw Alex after you beat him to a pulp, I saw that look in his eye when you ranked higher than him, I knew he would help me, Isn't that right baby?" I felt him nod.

"Now you're going to fry bitch," she walked over to a large metal box, turning a switch. The sound of something sharp hitting against something else made me scream louder, "But first I've got to cut you up into smaller pieces." the fight I had doubled to get out of Alex's grasp, I would have done anything to get away. The machine got louder as we moved closer, tears streamed down my face, I felt helpless as I fought against Alex's grasp. I couldn't give up, I wouldn't. I tried to bite Alex's hand but he remained unfazed.

Alex picked me up higher, I was hanging over the edge of the machine, as Sara laughed. I could now see the two sharp blades turning into each other, small sparks flew from the metal pieces clanged.

"Put her down!" Relief flew though my body, I had never been happier to hear his voice, "Turn the machine off and put her the fuck down," Alex instantly dropped me as I screamed, my hand grabbed the end of the machine, but I cried harder in relied as my knees hit the tiled ground and not two sharp blades.

"You two come with me," I heard Max speaking to them as the machine turned off. I turned my back to the machine resting against it trying to breathe through the tears, by the door stood Max, Eric, and Sara's big friend.

The three of them followed Max out as Eric moved closer.

"Are you okay?" he leaned down in front of me. I didn't say anything.

"Please tell me you're okay, I came as fast as I could," he pushed my hair out of my face. I was in shock I didn't think I could speak.

Eric soon lifted me off the ground, and held me like a baby in his arms, I didn't have what it took to ask him where we were going, tears were still running down my face. I had almost died.

Eric carried me up flights of stairs until we were outside his door, he didn't put me down as he opened it and walked past his little living room.

He laid me down on the left side of his unmade bed leaning down to take my shoes off, he didn't' say anything either as he pulled the blankets over me.

He took his shirt off and joined me on the other side of the bed, pulling me close.

"I've got you, I'm never going to let anything bad happen to you again, I promise," he whispered to me before kissing my forehead. He kept his lips to my forehead, only removing it to whisper that he had me until we both fell asleep.

* * *

AN: Why is everyone trying to kill Lana? I fear I'm truly warped.


	30. Chapter 30

Eric's POV- One Day Ago.

After my fight with Lana in the coat closet, I had decided that I was going to keep my word, I would quit it with Sara. If I was honest I didn't even know why I kept going back to her, she was nothing more than a bitch, not even the good kind. Not like Lana was; Lana was feisty and had the strength of most of the guys in Dauntless, but there was soft about her, probably the fact that the past year of her life remained a mystery. I had put my usual face on while we were in her Fearscape, but seeing her in that box made my dinner come up in my throat. I wouldn't even do that to my worst enemy, but it was her family that put her in there. After I dropped her off outside her room it took everything I had not to get on my bike and go to Amity to see her father myself, maybe lock him in the box and set it on fire. The thought of him screaming for help while his flesh burned brought a disturbing smile to my face.

Once I got to the kitchen's where I knew Sara would be I took a deep breath, ready to hear her throw a fit.

"ERRY," she clapped her hands together like a drugged seal. Every time she called me that the hair on the back of my neck stood on edge, but I let her continue to do it as long as she continued with the perks.

"Sara, it's over," I didn't want to let her down easy, personally I didn't care.

"What is? You're going to stop with the slut?" she asked as a smile made her eyes squish together, I didn't even know what color they were.

"Yes I'm done with the slut Sara," I knew she meant Lana, but this could be fun.

"Oh thank god, I was really going to have to hurt her soon Erry, I mean when we fought, that bitch bruised my face, MY FACE!" she dramatically pointed towards her poodle face, " She's such an evil girl," she made her way up to me, he hands on my chest like usual, her long pink talons could easily slit a throat. I slapped her hand off me.

"Sara, you're the slut, we're done, it's been..long to say the least," I should have turned and left, but I had to see the look on her face, my smirk came back. I really was fucked up.

"You're going to be with her?" her mouth opened so wide I think I saw a fly shoot in there.

"I'm not going to be with you, besides you're horrible in bed, I just liked the booze," I turned and left, the smirk still on my face. I couldn't believe that a kitchen appliance didn't come flying in my direction.

The next morning at breakfast I sat beside Max at the leader's table, while I carefully inspected my food. I sat in a direction so I could see Lana and her friends, she clearly was checking her food too, I wouldn't be surprised if there was a razor blade in her apple, apparently she was thinking the same thing. She stood out in the group of her friends even though she shouldn't have, her hair was pulled up in a huge knot on top of her head today, in a plain black t-shirt and denim shorts, but somehow she commanded the attention of the whole room.

Max spoke loudly from beside me to the new Dauntless pulling me out of my five minute once over of Lana.

"I think both Zach and Lana would be good choices for leadership, don't you Four?" Max asked after he sat down, I didn't even notice that Four was there.

"I don't think Lana would take it," she would be stupid not to, I thought.

"I'm surprised she did this well," Max continued on, "Amity always do well fighting, if they pull their heart out of it and use their head, they are very strong, from working in fields all day, but for some unknown reason fears get them every time,"

"I don't think she was an everyday run of the mill Amity," Four was pissing me off now, talking like he knew who she was. I felt my hands form a fist.

"No, but no transfer is, otherwise they wouldn't leave,"

* * *

"Um, Hi," Sara's friend Mandy walked into Max's office, while we were having a meeting. I remembered Mandy from my transfer year, she was from Candor. She had always been nice, until Sara got her claws into her, then she did a flip and became her little sidekick.

"We are busy," Max waved his hand towards the door.

"I'm sorry, but it's important," Max threw his pencil down annoyed and turned towards the girl.

"It better be,"

"You know that Lana girl? Well I think she is in danger," my heart instantly drew attention to itself in my chest.

"She seems to always be in trouble," Max didn't' care.

"They are going to kill her," Mandy ignored Max's attitude, she was talking to me.

"Who is?" I stood up my chair made a clanging noise on the floor.

"Lana, and that Alex boy, he's pissed that she beat him, and Sara, well you know." she didn't want to rat me out to Max, "They are looking for her,"

"How are they going to _kill her?_" Max still looked bored.

"They said they were going to chop her up and cook her," That drew Max's attention.

I quickly stood up to go wait by the train.

"When?" Max asked Mandy.

"I don't know, I left as soon as I heard their plan, I may be her friend, but I'm not a killer."

"She should of jumped of the train a few minutes ago," Max noticed looking at the clock.

I didn't care what he would say, I took off running, but I was surprised to feel him behind me on the stairs, luckily we were in Max's office not mine, which was a layer above the main floor. As we rounded the corner of the kitchen I heard the endings of Sara's speech . The three of them were by the meat grinder. Sara was standing with an ugly smirk, while she rubbed Alex's chest, who was holding Lana over in the air, a stern look on his face. He was ready to drop her at any time. Instantly I regretted bitching out Lana for beating Alex up.

"Put her down," every ounce of venom in my body poured out of my mouth, he continued to ignore me, "Turn off the machine and put her the fuck down," I ordered through gritted teeth.

He instantly dropped Lana close to the machine, my heart jumped far enough up my throat to choke me as she grabbed the machine but landed safely on the ground in front of the meat grinder, the noise of her cries filling the room. I got to her as fast as I could while Max took Sara and Alex out of the room. I had to put my hands on her, I needed her to know I was there, she sat on the ground in front of the grinder not reacting to my words or touch, without thinking I picked her up and began cradling her while going to my room.

Once I laid her in my bed I went to the other side pulling my shirt off for bed, I was almost sure you could see my heart beating through my chest from the events of tonight, Lana still hadn't said anything. I had never seen her look vulnerable at all, but at that moment she was like a battered baby doll, staring up at the ceiling like she didn't have a thought in her head, I knew looking at her that I never wanted to see her look like this again. I pulled her closer to me, want to knock her out of that mind set.

"I've got you," I did I wasn't letting go, "I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you again, I promise,"

That night we fell asleep with my lips to her forehead.

* * *

**Lana's POV**

I knew before I opened my eyes where I was, if you had told me yesterday your heart continued beating a million miles an hour, hours after you're attempted murder, I would have said you were crazy. Or that I would be in bed with Eric AGAIN, you might have gotten a more crude comment.

Finally I gave in and opened my eyes,.Eric was beside me rolled up in the sheet like a cocoon, a light snore came out of his mouth when his chest rose. It was almost cute, at that thought a snicker came out of my throat, waking Eric.

"hi," he turned in my direction while he rubbed the sleep in his eyes.

"Hey" I said sliding down further into the bed, trying to find some warmth from the blankets he stole. "I'd say thank you for yesterday, but I'd sound more like a broken record than you usually do," I tried to smirk but nothing showed on my face.

"Still insulting me I see," he could manage a smirk.

"I'll never stop, you're such an easy target."

"So, who is going to make an attack against your life today so I can save you again?"

I was glad he was making a joke of it, if I didn't laugh about it I would surely cry.

"Who knows, maybe Sara has another boyfriend," he scrunched his nose up in my direction.

"She tried to make me kill you, but I haven't had time to act on her plan yet,"

"Eric, how old are you?" it slipped out of my mouth, but I really had no idea who the man I was laying beside was.

"Eighteen, almost nineteen," he looked me in the eye as he answered. "I assume you're sixteen,"

"Why did you leave Erudite again? You're such a smarty," he thought about my words for a minute, instantly, I felt guilty for bringing up his old faction, remembering him talking about the tests they did on him.

"I didn't mean it like that," I opened my mouth to explain but he interrupted me.

"I know you didn't," but none the less he rolled over turning his chiseled back to me, his tattoo less back made him look younger, almost innocent.

"He said they gave me some sort of shot, when I was in Amity, to make me forget." I admitted to his back.

"Who?" He still didn't turn toward me.

"I guess Jeanine," I paused thinking about the small bit of information I had, "Or at least, she gave me some of it, Paul asked me how much they gave me after he left, but I don't remember anything,"

He finally turned around, "What happened to you Lan?"

"I wish I knew,"

The story poured out my mouth like word vomit, about what my grandparents had told me, and what I had found out on my own.

"And you don't remember any of it?" he questioned.

"The more I think about my life, the less I remember." I muttered to him.

"They used to do tests on me, because I wasn't smart enough," I felt his emotion while he spoke, I finally had a glimpse of why he was how he was, " I was always built like this, even without trying, I was the bronze they used to say, an brainless head, to them I was nothing more than a lab rat." I couldn't help it I rolled closer to him with my lips popped out, quickly they touched and I pulled back, a proper kiss, not the beginning of a make out session.

"Don't kiss me because you feel pity for me," he looked angry as he pulled back.

"I kissed you because I'm so happy to find someone more messed up than me," I smiled at him.

"At least I remember it happening," he tried to make light of our situation as well.

"Look where that got you," I lightly slapped his bare chest.

"I know, I'm king of the castle," he opened his arm trying to draw attention to the apartment around him.

"No, you're a true idiot,"

That morning was the first time I left Eric without a fight happening, a full twenty four hours, and I couldn't help the smile on my face as I walked down the hall.

* * *

AN: I'm back chickadees, I was stuck in NY airport due to the flooding over night, and finally made it back home just in time to catch up on my classes, so I won't be updating multipel times a day anymore, but I will try to do update a couple times a week.

Reviews for updates

–Lana.


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